Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes
by sunsetstrip2010
Summary: Prequel to Finger Tip Love Notes and At The Tips Of Our Fingers. Begins with Spencer's graduation day. Let's see what took place between then and future domestic bliss. :
1. Heads

Chapter 1: Heads

Spencer's POV

"Spencer Carlin Graduates! Spencer Carlin Graduates!"

Averting my attention from re-pinning my graduation cap to my hair, I turn to throw a blank stare at my girlfriend, who is maneuvering her black Porsche into a parking spot at the high school.

She puts the car into park, and turns it off before beaming at me, proud of her clever little joke.

So I guess I should explain the joke.

Ashley is not yelling an announcement of what today is and the accomplishment I am about to achieve like a proud girlfriend.

No, let me back up a bit.

So I have this older cousin in Ohio, Kate. And Kate is about ten years older than me. So Kate's Dawson's Creek was a little show called Beverly Hills 90210.

You following me?

Okay, here's more information.

So Kate told me that Ashley and I should rent the DVD collection of 90210 and watch it. It was apparently the rage, but I was far to young to watch it when it originally aired.

And so we did. It took us months upon months, but we watched the entire series of that show, a few episodes a night when we had time.

And we missed a plot line here and there. Most nights we'd end up fooling around…

SO anyway, you remember the episode when Donna, aka Tori Spelling, got all wasted before the prom? And then they almost did not let her graduate?

Well, let's just say my Ashley found that episode pretty hilarious. She walked around screaming "Donna Martin Graduates!" through the halls at school for a week.

And she received many looks…very similar to the one I am giving her now.

So back to present. NO, my sweet girlfriend is not making a proclamation. She's quoting 90210.

And it is taking all the restraint I have not to completely lose it.

And all restraint is gone. One look at her proud face, and it's all over.

"Baby, you are a complete goofball," I tell her sweetly as my laughter dies and I pull her into a tender kiss.

Pulling back she yanks tenderly on my blond curls, careful not to mess up the cap I have worked so hard to secure.

"I'm proud of you baby," she replies as she gives my face a few loving strokes. "You ready to do this thing?" She throws me a twinkling smile before hopping out of the car and beckoning me to follow her.

I slowly climb out of the passenger side and make my way around to her, smiling again as she takes my hand in her own.

Starting towards the front doors, we are met with some fellow graduates, who are adjusting caps and smiling nervously.

"Hey, guess what?" she asks a few classmates before we open the door to go inside.

They throw her confused and questioning looks as she turns and thrusts both arms in the air.

"SPENCER CARLIN GRADUATES!"

And I yank her firmly by one arm and drag her inside the school.

…

"Marcus Brock!"

I hear a few screams and hollers from the crowd as Mark takes the stage, proudly accepting his diploma with a handshake from Principal Beasley.

_Ok, I'm next._

"Spencer Carlin!"

_Oh. My. God._

_Was that a bullhorn?_

I avert my attention from the diploma that is being thrusted towards me to find my family on their feet, and my girlfriend with a large horn-shaped object in her hands.

And she's jumping up and down, almost manically.

I laugh out loud and give her a small wave before accepting my diploma and re-taking my seat.

But not before hearing…

"I LOVE YOU SPENCER CARLIN!"

Shaking my head lovingly up at her, I mouth:

_I love you too._

After a few more names are rattled of…I hear another familiar one.

"Aiden Dennison!"

And there's the blow horn again.

…

The after-graduation party is at the beach. Kyla, Chelsey, Aiden and I have finally rid ourselves of the sweaty polyester gowns and are stripped down to bikini tops and shorts.

Well, minus the bikini top for Aiden, though sometimes…I wonder…

Glen and Madison are making an 'appearance' and we have not failed to chastise them both for being the 'losers' who came back to the high school parties. Though secretly I am glad they are both here.

The bonfire is burning steadily, and a line has formed at the keg. Ashley grabs two cups and fills them before re-joining the crew.

"Hey, where's mine?" Aiden pouts as she hands one to me before kissing me quickly on the lips.

"I'm not your bitch," she smirks as she throws an arm around my shoulder.

"That's right. She's MY bitch," I remind him, eliciting laughter from everyone.

Well, everyone except Ashley. In fact, the pout on Aiden's lips transfers quickly to Ashley's, who turns to me, attempting to pull an apology from me.

"Baby…" she protests, causing me to smile and tilt my head endearingly towards her. "Oh, who am I kidding?" she confesses before capturing my lips again.

I pull her into a loving embrace before casting a look of triumph at the dumfounded faces who have witnessed the whole scene.

_Totally whipped._

"Alright, I'll get a round, but I need help carrying. Come on meathead." Glen signals for Aiden to follow him to the keg. "Alright you fucking losers. Out of the way. King High alumni in your presence!"

Aiden stands behind him, sticking his chest out, daring anyone to argue.

And I just laugh and shake my head, sharing eye rolls with their respective girlfriends.

…

As the last of the fire burns out, leaving barely more than glowing embers, I watch as people start to clear the beach slowly…and drunkenly might I add. Cabs are lining the edge of the beach, and I see a few disgruntled parents pulling their inebriated graduates into their cars.

The seven of us are huddled closely on blankets, finishing the last of our warm beers, swapping stories about our glory days, which ended officially today. I am leading into Ashley's chest and she has her arms wrapped securely around my stomach.

"Dude, you were drugged out of your mind. Your opinion hardly matters," Aiden teases Glen, who was in the midst of telling a pretty hilarious story about Aiden in French class last year.

"Whatever, man. If you ask me, you were the one smoking something," he retorts. "So anyway, he leans in and asks the chick if she wants him to tutor her. And he asks her in French. And to translate…he asked her if she wanted to come to his 'building' after 'work' to 'look at' some 'papers' with him. Or some shit like that. It was PA-THETIC."

"Shut up man. She thought I was charming." He throw Kyla a Cheshire Cat grin and wiggles his eyes at her.

"Yes, I am sure she was snowed, babe," she groans through rolled eyes.

We all laugh, sharing in her pain somewhat.

"You know what I will never forget, though?" Chelsey intervenes as Aiden pulls his face from Kyla's neck.

We all turn our attention to her.

Chelsey is usually a little less silly than the rest of us, and we are bracing ourselves for a tear-fest as she continues.

"When Ashley told Ms. Hudson that Kyla ate her homework before getting detention. Well after winking at Ms. Hudson and imitating cunnilingus before walking out of the classroom." She stares blankly at Ashley before bursting into laughter, joined again by the rest of us.

"Yeah, I mean for that to be a sign of what I was gonna do to Spencer after school, by the way," she chides and it's my turn to roll my eyes at my significant other. "What? I did…and then I DID." She winks at me and I feel my face grow hot.

_Yeah…she really did._

"Well, judging my Ms. Hudson's preference for Polo Shirts tucked into khaki pants, and her unusually short finger nails, I'd say she put you in detention, on her week to be on duty, for a very purposeful reason," I smirk through a wink.

"Yeah, not my type," she states dismissively before taking my hand in her own and sucking on one finger. "I like fingernails," she informs me as she bites softly on my nail.

"Oh yeah, you like them scratching…"

"OKAY, OKAY, ENOUGH!" Glen yells before covering his ears and slamming his eyes shut. "Jesus, it's bad enough I have had to hear it a few times," he moans before opening his eyes again, his expression pained.

"Lucky bastard," Aiden mumbles before yelping as Kyla's flat palm smacks his chest.

"Alright, gang. As fun as this is, I need to get my baby home so we can celebrate her accomplishment properly." She looks right at Glen when she says this, and he moans again before pulling Chelsey to her feet.

"For the sake of all things holy in this world, get me out of here. And please tell me she's staying at your place tonight," he practically begs as she helps me to my own feet.

"Yeah, but I am pretty sure you'll still hear us," she throws over her shoulder as we turn to start up towards the beach. "Hey, breakfast at Ed's in the morning," she suggests and everyone nods in agreement. "But not too early, Glen, if you know what I mean."

"ASHLEY!"

And that's the last thing we hear as the laughter drowns out the rest of his ramblings.

Well almost the last thing…

"SPENCER CARLIN GRADUATES! SPENCER CARLIN GRADUATES!"

…

"You want to know my favorite thing about you?" she whispers as she wraps her arms firmly around my face, pulling me close enough to steal another loving kiss, as we wrap up into one another in post-coital bliss.

"What?"

"Your eyes…" She kisses the corner of one softly, causing me to close them gently. She then places two kisses on my closed eyelids.

"Is that it?" I tease as I open them again to meet her stare.

"No…I also love your cute little button nose," she whispers again as she places a tender kiss on the tip.

"Anything else?" I stroke my hands through her sweaty brown curls as she laughs softly.

"Jeez…tough crowd," she smirks. "But NO…that's not it. I love your silky blonde hair, how it always smells like coconut," she exhales before burying her face into my locks, inhaling deeply.

I feel my body grow flushed as she presses more firmly against my front before pulling back.

"That all?" I continue, secretly loving every moment of this flattery.

"Well, in case you have not figured it out, I love every little thing about you, baby," she says honestly as she stares deeply into my eyes.

"That's cheating."

"Okay, fine, fine. I love your beautiful, soft forehead," she continues before placing a long wet kiss to it.

And I decide that although I would love for her to list of every single part of my body, I'd rather her actually just get down to the business of ravishing the parts she has yet to mention.


	2. Ed's and Hardy

Chapter 2: Ed's (and Hardy)

Ashley's POV

"Meathead," Glen greets Aiden as he and Kyla sink into two free chairs at the table, joining Glen, Chelsey, Spencer and I.

"Fuckface," Aiden retorts, groaning a bit as he grabs a menu, clearly suffering from a slight hangover from the graduation party the night before.

"Dude…what the hell are you wearing?" Glen asks with a face scrunched in disapproval.

And I pull my lips from Spencer's ear to finally greet my sister and best friend.

"Wow, it's Jon Gosselin in the flesh," I deadpan as Aiden looks down at his black t-shirt, adorned in fake jewels and bright colors.

"Whatever, it's totally in right now," Aiden protests as we continue staring at him like he has sprouted a third eye.

"Kyla, you let him out of the house dressed like that?" I give Kyla a questioning look as she just shakes her head and pats his bicep.

"Seriously, don't blame me for this," she insists as she pours herself a cup of coffee.

"It's totally in!" he exclaims again as he smoothes his hands over the front a few times.

"I think you look good, Aid," Spencer assures him sweetly.

I turn to her and throw her a soft smile.

_Always the sweetheart of the group._

"Thank you, SPENCER," he emphasizes, and I see Kyla ceremoniously roll her eyes as he puffs his chest out, drawing more attention to his be-dazzled front. "So where's Mad…"

"Hola Chicas and…" She stops dead in her tracks as she takes in Aiden's loud apparel. "And…uh…Chica's apparently. Nice threads Aid."

"Jesus! Glad I got out of bed for this abuse," he pouts as we all laugh, both at Madison's joke and Aiden's reaction.

"So….how's everybody feeling today?" she inquires as she takes the last empty seat at the table.

"Like shit." That's Glen.

"Pretty good." Chelsey.

"Tired and I have a headache." Kyla's interjection.

"I hate my friends." Clearly Aiden.

"Awesome…." That's me and Spence, practically in unison as we gush at one another.

"Alright, that's a lot of feelings," she smirks as she glances around the table. After a few moments of silence, she continues. "And I feel good, thanks for asking," she teases as we break concentration from coffee cups, menus, or in my case, my girlfriend's blue orbs.

"So what's everyone gonna eat?" Glen has a menu to his face, and I almost see the drool forming on the corner of his mouth.

_Food_.

For once, Glen's obsession with all things fried and buttered is not lost on me.

Six more menus are lifted off the table, and the normally boisterous group is silent for a good three minutes before the waitress approaches to take our orders.

…

"So, what's everyone gonna do with their summer?" Chelsey inquires excitedly as the last of the breakfast dishes are cleared away by a busboy.

"Drink, surf and sleep," Aiden announces. "Maybe not in that order, but come this fall, I'm gonna know nothing else but hours of practice and sprints till I puke."

"Dude, I'm sure a summer of drinking and being a complete piece of shit will prepare you well," Glen announces as Aiden flips him the bird. "I'm just sayin…I'm sure that whole puking thing…"

"Shut up loser. At least I'm not working at Lady Footlocker."

"It's not Lady Footlocker, you prick." 

"Guys, it's too early and we all had way to many beers last night for this," I groan, begging them to shut up. "SO, anyways, what about you Chels?"

She fiddles with her napkin before looking sideways at her fairly new boyfriend. I see his face drop momentarily before swallowing hard and forcing a supportive smile on his lips. "Just hanging with my man and painting a lot. I leave for Paris in mid-August," she reminds us before taking Glen's hand in her own.

"It's so exciting, Chels!" Spencer intervenes with her usual sweet support. "And wouldn't it be amazing if we could all come and visit you sometime?" She casts her huge blue eyes at me and I just nod my head before draping an arm around her shoulder.

"Oui," I agree, eliciting chuckles from the table. Everyone knows that is about the extent of what I retained from my beginner French class a few years ago.

"And Kyla?" Chelsey nods her head towards my sister, clearly wanting to continue this conversation.

"Well…apparently drinking, surfing and sleeping," she chides, nudging Aiden softly before continuing more seriously. "No, I don't really know actually. I have applied to UCLA but I haven't heard back. I want to get into a fashion design program somewhere, so I guess I will see about getting on with a local designer, doing an apprenticeship or something. We'll see…" Her voice trails off a bit, and I inwardly recognize what's going on in her head.

Kyla, much more than I, really regrets dropping out of high school. I never really thought the scholastic route was for me, but Kyla actually did really well in school, and needless to say she got a little caught up with the money and brief taste of fame over the past year.

"Hey, little sis. You'll get your big break," I assure her softly, catching her eyes before smiling supportively at her. I watch her stressed expression soften and she thanks me with her eyes before turning to Madison.

"Mads? What's your story this summer?"

"Wow, I figured I would go ignored on this Q and A as well. Thanks, Ky." Her eyes twinkle a bit before she glances around the table. "Well…I am hoping my songwriter will be hard at work on some more material for me." She looks straight at me before raising her eyebrows.

"Mads, let's get one thing straight. I am not YOUR songwriter. I'm a songwriter," I insist, causing her eyes to roll under those same raised brows. "BUT if you play your cards right, and quit calling my songs 'queer' I might hook you up with something before the summers through."

She cannot help but laugh at my threat-slash-promise, knowing full well she's insulted me to the point of not writing anything for her, but rather writing her out of my professional life.

"Alright, Ash. Point taken," she assures me, giving me a genuine smile. "And so what about the two lovebirds?"

I tighten my arms around Spencer's shoulder and pull her into me. "Well, I plan to relax with my baby as much as possible before she becomes the big woman on campus. BUT, first things first. We're moving her in tomorrow," I announce with wide excited eyes as I turn to Spencer.

"Yep, tomorrow's the big day," she agrees, throwing me a sweet smile, my excitement mirrored in her own eyes.

"Wow, Mom's gonna be a wreck," Glen assures us all, met with nods of agreement. "Good luck, Ash," he adds flatly.

And I cannot argue. Attempting to wriggle Spencer from her mother's grasp tomorrow is the only part of moving day I am not looking forward to.

Shaking myself from the dreaded thoughts, I take a sip of my coffee before glancing around at my closest friends.

"Well, I'll handle Paula Carlin. But don't you guys think you're getting off early. Carlin's house, 9:00 sharp, and bring your moving muscles," I remind them all, met with groans of protest.

"Sorry, Ash. I'm washing my hair," Glen states seriously, shrugging his shoulders as if its out of his hands.

"First time for everything," I retort, not missing a beat.

He sticks his tongue out at me, and I widen my eyes before tilting my head towards Spencer and wriggling my eyes.

That shut him up.

…

Walking hand in hand from Ed's, I give her hand a firm squeeze before opening the passenger door for her. I give her a chaste kiss before she climbs inside, and shut the door gently.

Making my way to the driver's side, I climb inside and throw her a quick smile before maneuvering my car onto the main drag.

"I can't believe you have to spend tonight with the fam," I pout a little pathetically as she chuckles and takes my right hand in her own, lacing our fingers together.

"Baby, you are gonna survive," she insists, only causing me to stick my lower lip out even further. This causes her laugher to increase momentarily. "Honey, after tomorrow, we'll never spend another night apart. But tonight, for my last night under my parent's roof, I need to be there with them, okay?"

She is facing me, leaning adorably back against the seat.

"I know…" I whisper, truly understanding the importance, but wanting her with me tonight nonetheless.

"And besides, you've been invited for dinner and game night. You'll simply have to survive eight short hours in that big bed without me."

"That's eight short hours too long," I respond immaturely, but honestly.

"Well, then you'll just have to call me when you get all settled in," she oozes and I feel my body grow hot.

On second thought, maybe this won't be such an AWFUL night…


	3. Shoulders

Chapter 3: Shoulders

Ashley's POV

"It's okay, Paula. We're just going to be a few miles away," I assure her as she buries her face in the crook of my neck, soaking my shoulder with hot tears. I glance with pleading eyes to Spencer, who only returns amusement at my predicament.

I knew this was going to be bad, but it's not even officially moving day…

"Wi…wi…will you pr…pr…promise to come over ev…every Sunday for family dinner?" She stutters through her convulsions as I comfortingly rub her back.

And she wipes her face along my bare shoulder again.

_EW_.

_I am pretty sure that's snot. _

"Every Sunday," I promise as she lifts her swollen eyes to meet mine. Finally releasing me from a near choke-hold, she turns to her daughter, beckoning her with open arms to come take over where I just left off.

Spencer rolls her eyes ever so discretely before taking Paula in her own arms. I reach out and stroke one of her blonde pig-tails gently and smile in understanding as she glances down at her now soaked shoulder.

_Pig tails. _

Normally adorable, but right now I am thinking of how fun it would be to have one in each hand while Spencer is going down…

"Ladies, soup's on!"

Arthur's announcement jolts me abruptly from the impure thoughts I was having about his daughter.

Shaking the thoughts the rest of the way from my brain, I take Spencer's hand in one of my own, and one of Paula's in the other, and we make our way to the dining room where we join Chelsey and Glen at the dinner table.

"Bout time," Glen moans as we take our seats.

As I open my mouth to insult him, ready to comment on his slightly expanding belly, I see a look of recognition wash over him as he takes in his mom's puffy, red eyes, before turning a sheepish gaze to Spencer and then to me.

I respond with a challenging look, begging him to say just one more word.

And he doesn't.

"So, Spencer, are you all packed and ready to go?" Arthur asks enthusiastically as he begins setting platters of pasta and salad and bread on the table. "Umm…hope family style is okay," he interjects, straying from the subject just as Paula starts to sniffle again.

_Good save, Art._

"This looks amazing, Mr. C.," Chelsey states appreciatively as we begin passing the food around the table.

"Incredible," I agree, suddenly realizing I am starving.

"Ashley, since you are stealing my ONLY daughter from me in just a few short hours, I think its only fitting you say the last grace I will ever hear with my family under my roof," Paula suggest, her tone uneven as she wipes a tear away with her napkin.

And I pull the fork of penne pasta that was about a centimeter from my mouth back as quickly as it was traveling towards my lips, and set it down quietly in hopes no one noticed.

"MOM, come on. Don't be so dramatic," Spencer groans as she gives my thigh a small squeeze under the table.

"No, it's alright Spencer. It's the least I can do," I say sweetly, directing my words to Paula, who raises a challenging eye back to me.

Don't get me wrong. Paula and I really do get along fabulously these days. But every once in a while, we hit a small speed bump in the road.

And the fact that I am 'stealing her only daughter' tomorrow morning to come live with me in sin, well, that's the kind of speed bump that could knock a car out of alignment.

And the living in sin thing…not a gay thing, seriously.

No, if you live together before marriage, well, you are living in sin. And regardless of Paula's acceptance of Spencer and my relationship, you can take the girl partially out of the Catholic Church, but you cannot completely take the Catholic Church out of the girl.

"Wonderful. Everyone, please join hands," she instructs before throwing me yet another doubtful look.

"Ahem…" I clear my throat nervously before continuing. "Dear God, thank you for this wonderful meal that Arthur has prepared for this beautiful family. We know that this food, however, is a gift from you, Lord, and through it we will find nourishment and strength."

I peek out of one eye at Paula, who's eyes are still closed, but note the doubt on her face has started to melt away.

"LORD, please be with Paula and Arthur as they begin a new phase of their lives, and lend them your hand, Lord, when they need your strength in the days to follow when their daughter moves into the next phase of her life."

I feel Spencer's hold on my hand tighten before I continue.

"LORD, give your strength to Glen and Chelsey in the months to come, so that they may find peace and security in their love as Chelsey journeys to far away lands. Watch over and protect her, and bring her home safely to us when your plans for her in Paris are over."

I steal another peek at Paula, who is now nodding slowly, her eyes concentrating through closed lids, her lips pursed together in more concentration.

"AND LORD, be with Spencer and I as we continue to grow and thrive in this life that you have blessed us with. Help me to protect her from harm and support her endeavors, as I know your strength will allow her to do for me."

I feel her hand begin to shake, and I am fairly sure it is from the stifled laughter she is holding inside.

"In your name Lord, we pray, AMEN."

I open both eyes and take a moment to glance around the table.

Spencer's jaw is open and she is staring blankly at me, as if I am a stranger who has randomly wandered into the house and made herself at home at her family's table.

Paula is staring adoringly at me, still nodding her head before shaking it in utter amazement.

Arthur is staring at his wife out of the corner of his eyes as if trying to gauge her reaction to my prayer.

Chelsey is glancing around the table, opening her mouth as if to speak, and then quickly shutting it again before fixing her eyes on Glen.

And Glen, his jaw is on the table.

"Thank you, Ashley. That was just lovely," Paula gushes, interrupting the silence before signaling for everyone to begging eating.

"What the HELL was that," Spencer whispers as she pretends to lean over me to grab the salad she already has a healthy helping of.

I just smile innocently at her before helping lift the salad bowl to her.

"Ahem…yes, Ashley, very nice words," Arthur adds, still looking a bit dumbfounded.

"Well, let's eat!" I suggest as I finally shove the forkful of pasta in my mouth.

…

After a 'rousing' game of Scrabble, Paula and Arthur retire to the bedroom, but not before kissing and hugging the four of us to within an inch of our lives.

Glen, Chelsey, Spencer and I continue to hang out, engaging in intelligent conversation for a little while longer.

"So Ash, that was quite a prayer," Glen says with amusement as he places the lid on the game before throwing an arm around Chelsey and scooting closer to her on the couch.

"Why, thank you, Glen. I don't know, the spirit just moved me," I retort, causing Spencer and Chelsey to chuckle softly.

"Babe, I thought it was really nice…from the heart," Spencer assures me lovingly as she leans into my chest.

"Yeah, if her heart is located in her ass." He looks at me smugly and I see his tongue begin to exit his mouth before he quickly retracts it, recalling the last time he made that mistake.

"Well, babe, I better get you home. And you guys have fun tomorrow. You know, it's not too late to call some movers," Glen suggests smugly as he helps Chelsey put on her jacket.

"GLEN!" Spencer moans, and I just shake my head at him.

"See you at nine, buddy," I retort coolly as we rise to hug Chelsey goodnight.

"We'll be here," Chelsey assures us before throwing Glen an insistent look.

"Thank you, Chels," Spencer says appreciatively as Glen rolls his eyes, realizing there is nothing else to debate.

"See you in the morning," he promises with fake sincerity before closing the door behind him.

Turning to Spencer, I pull her into my arms and she snuggles into my neck.

"I should be going, too," I inform her with zero enthusiasm.

She sighs, displaying her protest, before pulling back and wrapping her arms around the back of my neck. "One more night…" she whispers before pressing her lips firmly to mine.

"One more night…" I respond, longingly, before kissing her again…

And it's one of those Hollywood movie kisses, where the man beds the girl backwards before kissing her passionately.

And when I am truly sure I won't be able to leave her, she straightens up before smiling brightly.

"Goodnight baby. See you in the morning, okay?"

"Goodnight, Spence."

I give her one last puppy-dog look before turning to leave. "Oh, and don't forget, you own me a phone call in about…hmmmm…thirty minutes." And I wink before she closes the door slowly.


	4. Moving In And Making Plans

Chapter 4: Spencer's POV

Moving In And Making Plans

"Glen, get off your ass!" I cry as I find him on the couch with his Play Station paddle in his hands…where he has been for the last half an hour since I started asking him to help me carry boxes downstairs.

"Dude, its 8:30. Ashley said 9," he protests, his eyes never leaving the screen.

I sigh loudly and move to stand between him and his game.

"Spencer, move!" He shifts on the couch and attempts to lean so he can see around me.

"Glen you promised to help today," I plead with him as I spread both arms out to each side in an attempt to block more of his view.

Hitting pause on his paddle, he tosses it to the side before leaning back into the couch and crossing his arms stubbornly. "Look, that slave-driver of a girlfriend of yours will be here any minute, barking orders at me." He raises a challenging eyebrow to me before continuing. "So please, let me enjoy the last few moments of peace around here."

I roll my eyes in irritation before dropping my arms to my side and joining him on the couch. "Glen, in a few short hours from now, I will be moved out of here, and you'll have all the peace you could ever want," I remind him, my eyes still pleading as I glance at the stack of boxes I have started to form in the hallway after several exhausting trips up and down the stairs alone.

Dad is still cleaning up the breakfast dishes, and Mom has been sitting on my bed, sulking as she thumbs through photo album after photo album, mainly of me as a little girl.

_No, she's not being overly helpful. _

I note Glen's face soften a bit at the reminder, and he shakes his head softly. "Okay, okay, I'll help," he assures me as I grin from ear to ear and stand up before offering him a hand to pull him from the couch.

As I turn to walk up the stairs, I hear him clear his throat.

"Spence," he calls after me softly, and I turn to find him standing at the bottom of the stairs, his face surprisingly somber.

"Yeah?"

"You know, for the record…" He runs his hands shyly through his blonde curls before meeting my confused stare. "I'm not really that excited about you moving…I mean, I am excited for YOU, but I'll miss you, okay?"

He is actually blushing a little, and I find it painfully sweet.

"I know, big brother. I'll miss you, too," I reply honestly as I give him a warm smile. "But it will be a little more peaceful around here, admit it," I throw in, attempting to lighten the moment a bit.

"Ha…yeah, eventually, once Mom recovers from her depression and becomes normal again…" He grins stupidly at me and I laugh out loud.

"Normal AGAIN?" I disagree with a moan, just as her voice pierces through the house.

"Spencer, come here! Look at this picture I found of you on your first day of kindergarten!"

_See_? I ask him with only my eyes.

"Point taken."

…

I can hear excited chatter downstairs as I continue to sit next to my mom and humor her for a bit longer as she plays 'Spencer Carlin, This Is Your Life' with my photographs. I can hear Ashley's raspy voice begin to bark out orders, and it makes me smile inwardly.

I really want to go down and see her, but I am painfully aware of the fact that I cannot leave my mom…not just yet.

"Sweetheart, your hair was so blonde!" She coos as she runs her fingers over yet another picture of me in dance recital gear.

"Yes, mom, it was," I agree, only half-listening to her as my eyes dart towards the hall. Just then, I see my girlfriend appear in the doorway, her brown eyes twinkling with excitement momentarily before hesitation takes over her beautiful face.

"Hey…" she starts slowly before glancing behind her, possibly contemplating an escape plan.

"Hey babe." I raise my eyes widely at her, signaling that I need her to rescue me.

"Oh, hi Ashley," my mom forces out, not even attempting to mask her sadness as she lays eyes on the one who is whisking me off and out from under her roof in a few hours.

"Hi Paula," Ashley responds brightly as she slides down next to her, reaching behind her to fumble for my hand.

I lean behind my mom and give her a grateful look, and she winks before turning her attention back to the moping older blonde sitting between us.

"So…watcha guys doin?" She asks with forced interest as I rub my thumb over her hand.

"Oh…just looking at pictures of my baby girl…" my mom sighs as she turns the page of the album she is currently working on. "Oh look, Ashley, isn't she just precious?"

I look down to see a picture of a six year-old me, dressed as a princess for Halloween.

"Yes, she's pretty precious," Ashley agrees as she catches my eyes again, her nose crinkling in both amusement and adoration. "She was always a little princess, huh?" She adds, the sarcasm dripping, but completely lost on my mother.

"Yes, my little princess," she agrees densely, missing the smirk on Ashley's face as she shakes her head and glances at me before nodding towards the door.

"So, Paula, I am gonna go back downstairs and see what I can help the gang with, okay?" She suggests as she starts to rise, before falling back a bit.

Yeah, my light caresses to her hand just shifted into a death grip.

"Spence…" she draws out as she uses her other hand to pry my fingers from her. "Babe, you and your mom can finish up the packing and I'll see you downstairs, okay?" She says this too sweetly as she successfully wrestles from my grasp before rubbing her wrist, feigning injury and sticking her lower lip out at me.

Although I am miffed she is abandoning me, I cannot help but smile at her little act.

"Okay, we'll be right down," I inform her as she pauses in the doorway.

"Uh huh," my mom responds blankly as she flips the page again.

Before disappearing completely around the corner, she peeks her head back through the door.

_I love you_, she mouths.

_I know_, I mouth back.

…

"Well, I think that's everything," I announce as we stand in the driveway, Aiden and Glen's SUV's packed full of my belongings, Ashley's backseat filled with what little odds and ends one can squeeze in the back of a Porsche. We've managed to score a fourth vehicle, a pick-up truck Kyla borrowed from some guy who works on the sets in her drama club, and the bed is packed full of boxes as well.

"Honey, are you sure?" My mom inquires, almost desperately. We could go take one more look around your room..." she suggests and I see the tears brim again.

"Mom, we have everything, I promise," I assure her as I watch nervous faces begin to turn towards the caravan in the driveway and parked on the street.

"Hey, Spencer, we are gonna head to the loft, so we'll…uh…just meet you guys over there," Aiden announces, breaking the awkward silence.

"Kyla has a key," Ashley reminds them as she signals them that we 'need a few moments' with her eyes.

'Yep, I got it. We'll see you over there," Kyla states matter-of-factly as she climbs in the passenger side of Aiden's vehicle, the others following suit.

I hear engines start up and watch as they follow one another down the street and are soon out of sight.

Taking in a deep breath, I turn towards my parents. My dad has his arm wrapped securely around my mother, who is leaning against his chest, her eyes closed tightly, tears pouring from the closed slits.

"Mom…" I whisper as I make my way to them both, Ashley just steps behind me. My mom opens her eyes and glances back and forth between us sadly.

"Mom, let's not do this again, please," I beg her softly, feeling my own tears start to sting my eyes.

"Oh, Spencer!" she cries before pulling me roughly into her arms. I squeeze her tightly and feel my father's strong arms wrap around us both.

"Honey, we're just going to miss you," he reminds me softly before placing a very fatherly kiss on the top of my head.

I pull back and glance at Ashley who appears to be searching for something to say, her eyes pleading with me for the same rescue she barely gave me earlier in my room.

"I know, and I am gonna miss you both, too. But remember, we won't be far away." I feel Ashley move in so that she is right next to me and I feel a sense of comfort in her presence.

"Paula, Arthur, I will take good care of her, I promise," she assures them honestly before placing an arm firmly around my waist.

"We know you will, and thank GOD she'll be there to take care of you," my dad teases which draws laugher from everyone, including my mother.

"Every Sunday," she reminds us both for the dozenth time since last night.

"Whenever humanely possible," Ashley replies, in an attempt to not commit us to Sunday family dinners for the rest of our existence.

"As long as there's not a fire, flood, or medical emergency," my mom interjects, her swollen eyes twinkling a bit as she pulls Ashley into a warm hug.

"Or a sick child," Ashley mumbles into her neck and I feel myself bite down on my tongue to keep from laughing or making any other noise whatsoever.

And my mom pulls back, all previous sadness gone.

_Oh great._

After receiving a long hug from my dad, she turns her proud face to me, tilting her head just a bit to signal to me that I can thank her later for that last comment.

And after a few more blown kisses and waves from inside the car, we are on our way home.

…

"Well that was fun," Ashley moans as we walk through the front door of the loft to be greeted by stacks of boxes practically blocking our entrance.

Aiden and Glen appear from the direction of our bedroom, and Glen chuckles knowingly at her exhaustion.

"I hate to say I told you so…"

"No you don't," she interrupts and he shrugs his shoulders at her before he and Aiden head down to grab another round of boxes from the cars.

Turning towards me, she pulls me into her arms gently and presses her nose against mine.  
"You're here," she sighs before closing her eyes, apparently reveling in the realization that I am really going to be living here with her.

"I sure am," I agree before sneaking a kiss, knowing we're not completely alone.

"Ash, Spence, is that you?"

I laugh against her lips, my knowledge being confirmed.

"Yes, Kyla!" I call back, shaking my head as I stare longingly in her deep brown eyes.

"Just a few more hours," she reminds me before kissing me quickly again.

"Well get in here!" We turn to see Ashley's slightly impatient sister standing in the living room, hangers of clothing hanging off both hands. "Seriously, we're not moving you AND unpacking you while you guys stand out here and make out," she insists, a trace of amusement on her face.

"Coming!" we announce simultaneously as we follow Kyla into our bedroom to join Chelsey, who is starting to cut through the tape on a box that is sitting on the bed.

"Oh, God!" I cry out as I take in the black magic marker on the side of the box facing away from Chelsey.

_**Spencer's Personals**_

"Chels, I'll take care of that one later," I insist breathlessly as I yank the box from her grasp and set it in the corner of the closet.

Ashley throws me an amused look as I turn my eyes back to a very startled and confused Chelsey.

"Sorry, Spence, I was just trying to…" and her voice trails off as realization sets in. Never mind…" she clears her throat and appears to stifle laughter as she turns to Kyla, who just shakes her head.

"Any other boxes we should avoid?" Kyla inquires through raised eyebrows.

"No, just the one," I respond before picking up a new box and placing it delicately in front of Chelsey on the bed.

_**Bathroom Stuff**_

"Here, Chels, you wanna go unload this stuff in the bathroom?" I give her a look that signals she's safe, and she rises and lifts the box before making her way to Ashley's bathroom.

…

After we are satisfied that we've unpacked enough to get me through the next few days, Ashley orders a few pizzas and the boys run down the street to re-park the cars out of the loading zone.

I grab some plates and napkins from the kitchen and set them on the bar as Kyla and Chelsey sink down onto the couch, clearly exhausted from the busy day. As I begin to straighten the kitchen up a bit, I feel two arms wrap around me from behind and soft lips hit just under my left ear.

"You can do that tomorrow," she whispers before sucking softly on my pulse point, eliciting a soft moan from my lips.

"You can do that tomorrow, too," I respond coyly before turning in her arms and wrapping my own arms around her neck. "AND tonight," I add seriously.

"Yeah, let's get these guys fed and out of here," she whispers against my lips before kissing me deeply.

"Pizza's here!" We hear Aiden announce from the living room, causing us to groan and pull away from each other.

"They better eat fast," I grunt through gritted teeth, but then give Ashley a sheepish look, forcing us both to remember how great they have all been today.

We join them in the living room, and Ashley pays the delivery boy and I help her lay the boxes out on the bar in the kitchen, insisting our movers load up their plates first.

Once everyone has several slices of pizza and a cold soda, we gather around the coffee table, some on the couch and others on the floor, and I amusedly glance around at the faces being shoved full of greasy pizza.

This group only ever is quiet when food is involved.

"So, thank you so much, everyone, for helping us today. We never could have done it without you," I tell them gratefully between bites of my own slice of pepperoni.

"Yeah, seriously, friends, despite your original protests," Ashley chimes in, throwing a smirk in my brother's direction, "you really are the best friends two lesbian life partners could ask for," she concludes, or rather mumbles, her own mouth shoved full of hamburger and mushroom.

I take in a chorus of amused chuckles, though I know no one is really surprised by her rather unorthodox sentiment.

"Well, our efforts are actually a bit selfish," Kyla confesses. I turn towards her, instantly curious as to what she means by this. "I mean, Ashley is a real asshole most of the time when you aren't here," she informs me flatly, and I laugh at her statement, and then the defensive look on my girlfriend's face.

"Whatever, I am not," she protests, only to be met by three other voices (myself excluded) debating her and agreeing with Kyla.

"Fine, whatever," she surrenders before turning a sweet look to me. "But hey, if she was yours, you'd be pretty grouchy when she wasn't around too."

_Aww…._

"Awww…" My inner thoughts are echoed by a few of my friends, my brother included.

"And if you were SLEEPING with her, well then…"

"God Ashley! Do you have to ruin it every single time!" Glen groans in disgust as he rises and starts to clear the dishes from the table.

Ripping my gaze from the girl who has just reminded me of exactly what I want to be doing right now, I start to help Glen with the dinner mess before innocently glancing at my watch.

"Wow, would you look at the time," I announce in feign shock as I glance straight-faced at Ashley, who bites her lip in amusement.

"Um…it's not like it's a school night…" Aiden starts to remind me before his face shifts to a knowing look. "Oh….yeah, right…" he voice trails off as he smirks at Kyla. "So, you coming to my place tonight?" He suggests through raised eyebrows before nodding his head towards our bedroom.

"Apparently," she smirks before he helps her off the floor.

"So, yeah, hate to scoot you all out, but we are EXHAUSTED," I stress, only to be met with eight rolls of eight eyes.

"We get it, we get it," Glen insist as the four make their way to the front door.

"So enjoy your first night of domestic bliss," Chelsey says warmly as she gives us both a hug goodbye.

"We will," I promise her as he hug the rest of our guests goodbye. "And thank you again, seriously. We owe you much more than pizza…" I start to assure them before Ashley cuts me off abruptly.

"Yes, big thank you dinner, another night," she insists as she thanks them all profusely before scooting them out the door.

Closing it tightly, locking it, and double checking the lock, she turns to me and leans back against the door, her eyes tired but filled with excitement…and lust.

I pull my tired body from leaning over the counter and turn to face her fully.

"Alone at last," she informs me, wiggling an eyebrow before starting towards me, my body moving quickly towards her as well.

And I am sure our heads are full of loving assurances of how great it is going to be now that we are officially living together, but those thoughts get pushed into the very backs of our heads as our bodies collide and our lips immediately fuse together.

Pulling back momentarily, she clutches my face in her hands. "God, I've been dying for this moment since your phone call last night," she informs me breathlessly as she presses her forehead to mine.

"You have no idea, baby," I agree vehemently as I begin pushing her backwards in the general direction of our bedroom, both of us shedding shoes and tops and fumbling with zippers as we continue assaulting each other's mouths with our respective tongues.

Barely making it through the door to our bedroom, I shimmy out of my pants and help her do the same before collapsing on top of her on the bed.

We let out collective moans as our barely clothed bodies connect, the heat between us already so intense that sweat begins to bead up and cause our bodies to slide almost sloppily against one another.

Flipping me over on my back, she rolls on top of me and strengthens her hold on me, giving our writhing bodies greater control as we begin sliding against one another.

"I love you so much," she moans into my neck before licking and sucking it aggressively but not violently, causing my hips to buck into her sharply.

"I love you too, baby," I assure her as my eyes slam shut, my breathing becoming erratic as she has be out of my bra in a second flat.

I return the gesture and our naked chests slide against one another, causing us both to pant hotly.

I feel her fingers trace down my trembling abdomen and begin to finger the waistband of my black boy-shorts before she begins to lower them, way too slowly for my liking.

"Get them off of me," I practically beg, as she smiles into my neck, ridding me completely of the garment before pulling hers swiftly from her own body. My hands immediately connect with her heated center and I raise my hips towards her again, urging her to do the same.

"Tell me what you want," she urges me, her lips lingering centimeters from my own.

"You know what I want," I remind her as she begins rubbing slowly, eliciting another deep moan from my mouth.

"I want to please you," she continues, he fingers moving deeper in between my legs, my fingers parroting her motions.

"You know how to please me," I remind her again, my hips taking on a life of their own as her fingers press more firmly against me.

"I want to make you scream in pleasure," she informs me as she slides two fingers deep into me.

And I lose all track of time, but sometime later, I am all of the sudden very grateful for the fact that Kyla has decided to stay out tonight, because that's exactly what I do.

And just moments after that, she does as well.

…

"You live here…you live with me…we live together…" She is making these little announcements between kisses to my swollen lips.

"I know, baby. It's official. There's no going back now," I challenge her lightly as I lift my head slightly off the pillow, jutting my lips towards her, asking for another kiss.

"And who says I'd ever want to go back," she pouts as if taking offense to my last statement.

"Aww…honey…I'm just saying. You'd have to pack a lot of boxes, AND convince Glen to help move me again if you ever decide to un-do what we've done here," I inform her with a slight smirk as I push my lips out towards her again.

She denies my attempts and pulls her face from mine. "Why are you talking like that, Spence? I don't want to un-do a thing, and I never will," she informs me, the honesty on her face making my heart flutter.

"Ash, I know. I am only teasing you," I assure her, not wanting to detract from our perfect night.

"Do you…" She hovers her body over mine and looks deeply and seriously into my eyes. "Do you know…that this is forever?"

And I am a bit taken back by the apparent lack of confidence in her eyes as she asks me these questions.

"Ashley, of course I do. That's all I've ever wanted, since the day I met you. Was to be lying in your arms one day, knowing that I would spend the rest of my life with you." I stroke her cheek lovingly and nod reassuringly that every word I am saying to her is one-hundred percent true.

And relief washes over me as her concern melts away and her nose crinkles in her special smile, the one she reserves for only me.

"Okay, then that's settled," she announces before resting back down on top of me. "Forever it is," she concludes before sealing the promise we've just made to one another with a sweet but passionate kiss. "Oh, and the next time Glen is lifting boxes, it will be to move us into our own place," she states through wide, excited eyes.

And as she nestles into my side and pulls me more tightly to her, I sigh in content.

And I cannot help but wonder when, not if, that will actually happen.


	5. I'll Be There For You

Chapter 5: I'll Be There ForYou

Spencer's POV

"Come to bed!" I hear her call loudly as I continue straightening up in the kitchen.

It's been one week, officially, since I moved in with Ashley, and as wonderful as she has been about making me feel like this is now my home too, I am slightly paranoid about not 'pulling my weight' around the condo.

"In a minute, babe. I am just going to finish loading the dishwasher!" I call back as I begin loading the dinner dishes.

"SPEEENCEEE…It can wait till tomorrow!" she yells impatiently, and I shake my head.

I am not really sure where my house-keeping insecurities stem from.

Ashley, despite being incredibly sweet, attentive, sexy, fun and always doting, is a complete SLOB.

And though it has not bothered me in this short week, I am pretty sure we have some things to work on.

For one, she never puts her dishes in the dishwasher.

**Exhibit A: The dinner dishes I am currently loading include her coffee mug from the morning and her cereal bowel and spoon. **

Second, she has a slight aversion to putting her clothes in the hamper or the laundry room.

**Exhibit B: Her jeans are strewn over the couch, her socks are on opposite sides of the living room, and her robe is lying haphazardly in the entry way of our bedroom (and don't ask my why).**

Third, she has an actual room for her music-making.

**Exhibit C: One of her guitars is leaning against the couch in the living room, and there are sheets of the music she has been working on scattered all over the coffee table.**

Yes, my Ashley is a slob…and I am the one worried about 'pulling my weight'.

But all of these tiny little 'imperfections' are trivial to me at this point.

Especially when I glance up from my dishwasher-loading to see her standing in her bra and a tight pair of work-out shorts, her hair pulled loosely on the top of her head, and a look on her face that can only be described as one of 'wanting'.

"Spence…come to bed," she practically commands and my eyes avert to her perfect breasts before trailing down to her defined abs and then quickly to her slender, perfectly tanned legs.

Rinsing the last plate in the sink, I smile and start the dishwasher.

"Okay, babe. I am right behind you," I assure her as I wipe the counter one more time for good measure.

"Did Kyla come home?" She asks through raised eyebrows.

"Yes, about twenty minutes ago," I inform her as the dishwasher begins its steady hum.

"Well, then it's a good thing the dishwasher is running…" she winks as she begins to turn back towards the bedroom. "Though I don't think it will drown out your screams," she challenges as she glances over her shoulder at me.

I chuckle softly as I follow her into our room.

But I really cannot argue. This girl does make me scream…and moan…and hiss…and curse…and lose all ability to form coherent sentences.

I glance quickly in the hallway mirror before joining her in the bedroom.

_What? _

_I still like to look good for my girl. _

_And yep, I think I do tonight. _

Pulling the beads aside, I finally enter the bedroom and find her lying on her back on the bed, propped up a bit on her elbows, her normally chocolate eyes practically black as she looks me up and down.

"We need a door," I announce seriously as I sweep a few strands of beads off my shoulder.

"We need our own place," she responds matter-of-faclty as she pats the bed next to her.

_Huh. Second mention of this idea and I have only been here a week. _

That's when I notice 'Spencer's Personals' sitting on the floor next to our bed, the tape ripped open and our little splurge from a few months back sitting patiently on the night stand.

"We need more batteries," I inform her just as matter-of-faclty as I eye the contraption longingly.

She quickly whips open the nightstand drawer and out pops a huge package of double A's.

"THAT, I have taken care of," she replies with a seductive smirk.

_Thank the Lord. _

Dishes and clothes and music mess are soon thrust to the back of my mind, and different kind of thrusting quickly replaces all former thoughts.

_We really are the perfect combination. _

I undress quickly down to my bra and panties and move towards the bed, not missing the darkening of her eyes (they are black at this point and mine are probably navy if I had to guess) as my hands sweep the 'splurge' off of the nightstand and into her waiting hands.

"You ran some errands today?" I ask, not even attempting to hide my gratitude as she flips be on my back before yanking my already soaked panties from my body.

Her response is anything but verbal as she discards her remaining delicates before securing the harness in place with amazing grace.

_And how sweet thou are baby…_

I can feel the tip of the dildo on my stomach as she begins peppering my face with heated kisses. My hands move to her lower back to grip her tightly to me and her skillful hands remove my bra so that there is nothing between us but the hard addition to her perfect body.

And trust me, I would never need anything by Ashley's perfect body to please me, but I won't lie…the discovery of sex with an extra appendage has not been disappointing to me.

My legs instinctively part wider as I feel her hips dip lower so she can rest the tip against my dripping entrance.

Just then, I hear the dishwasher kick in to full-blown wash mode.

And just then, she enters me quickly and I fell every inch of myself become full.

And the scream that leaves my lips renders the background noise of the dishwasher completely useless.

_Sorry, Kyla. _

…

"You are so fucking amazing, Ashley," I inform her as soon as I can form words again.

"You cannot fuck amazingly unless you have something amazing to fuck," she responds breathlessly as she withdraws from me completely. I moan at the loss of contact, but gladly accept her appendage free body as it melds back into me.

_I love it when she says things like that. _

"I never want this summer to end," I reply, my tone quickly switching from sexy to serious as I pull her tightly to me.

"Well…" She takes a long, unsteady breath before placing a deep and loving kiss on my wet, swollen lips. "This summer may come to an end eventually, but baby, it's only just begun, so let's not worry about that right now, okay?"

Her voice is so sincere and she feels so good lying on top of me, that all thoughts of college and monotony quickly fade from my mind.

_Only Ashley Davies can avert my thoughts that quickly. _

Shifting me so that I am lying on her chest and in her arms, she grabs the remote from the nightstand and flips the television on while kissing my temple tenderly.

I settle into her and let myself fully relax as the opening song to the _Friends_ re-runs that we have been watching for the last few nights fills the room.

Ashley begins singing softly to me, her warm breath tickling my inner ear.

_I'll be there for you…when the rain starts to fall…_

It's so simple and maybe a little cheesy to an outsider, but she has sung this part of the opening credits to me almost every night since we have discovered this little gem called 'Friends'.

_I'll be there for you, like I've been there before…_

And it's not cheesy at all. I don't care what anyone might say.

_I'll be there for you, cause you're there for me too…_

And I sink impossibly deeper into her chest as her soft finger tips begin to stroke my damp back.

"This really is a good show," I announce as Jennifer Aniston says something that cracks both of us up.

"I know. Why does t.v. suck so much now? We missed all the good shows," she agrees before kissing my forehead gently.

"Ah, now come on. We had the Creek," I remind her as I stroke her equally damp stomach a few times before dipping down and placing a kiss on her collar bone.

"Yeah, but 'Joey Potter Graduates!' just doesn't have the same ring," she informs me with fake protest, and I laugh into her neck before nuzzling into it and turning my attention back to our newfound 'friends'.

"Ross and Rachel really are kind of cute, if you are into that sort of thing," I confess as I lose myself momentarily in a moment on the re-run episode when Ross is trying to teach Rachel how to do laundry at a New York City laundry mat.

"They're okay," Ashley replies with a yawn. "But you know who they don't show enough of on this show?"

"Carol and Susan," I respond, knowing exactly what she is thinking.

"Carol and Susan," she confirms before meeting my adoring gaze.


	6. No Woman No Cry

Chapter 6: No Woman No Cry

Ashley's POV

"Where are you going?" I whine.

Yes, I am whining, and I know I am, but watching her flawless bare back, with the perfect little dimples on each side of her upper hips in her lower back region, leave the bed and become covered too quickly with her robe…

Well, it makes me feel a little 'needy'.

"Babe, we've been in here for over twenty-four hours. It's becoming a bit ridiculous," she smirks as she ties the robe to her front. "And baby, your gorgeous brown curls are looking a bit dread-lockish," she informs me, her smirk replaced with a toothy grin.

I feign defensiveness before attempting to run my fingers through what I realize is actually a pretty greasy, matted mess.

_She might be right. _

"Well, mon," I begin in what can only be described as a piss-poor Jamaican accent. "Why doncha com' to the shower with me mon? I'll make you feel Irie."

I hear her laugh deep within her belly before she turns an adoring gaze upon me.

"Ash, we need food and sunlight," she informs me flatly, attempting to stifle more laughter as I rise from the bed and begin moving towards her, squinting my eyes in my best stoner impression.

"Ah, come on now, mon," I continue, feigning a hit from a joint as I pull her to me. "Every little ting's, gonna be alright, baby," I whisper in her ear as I grab her hips and force her to sway lazily with me as I begin singing in her ear, not losing my Jamaican accent.

"No woman, no cry…"

"Ashley…" she whispers as I pull her hips into me and continue rocking us back in forth.

"NO WOMAN, NO CRY…."

"You are a nerd."

"Said said…  
Said I remember when we used to sit…  
In the school yard in King High…"

She giggles against my neck as I continue to fumble for words to change Mr. Marley's political statements to my own statement to my girlfriend as we dance around my bedroom.

"Oba, ob-serving the hypocrite cheerleaders,  
As they would mingle with the good people we meet…  
Good friends we have had, oh good friends we've lost along the way…  
In this bright future you can't forget your past…  
So dry your tears I say…

No woman, no cry…  
No woman, no cry!  
Oh my Little baby, don't shed no tears  
No woman, no cry!"

I spin her around by one arm before pulling her back to my chest, forcing one thigh in between her legs, relishing as she moans softly at the contact.

"Said, said, said…. I remember when we used to sit…  
In the gritty sand in Redondo…  
And then Glenny would make the fire light…  
Log wood burnin' through the night….  
Then we would cook macaroni…and cheese…  
Of which I'll share with you…"

She is laughing uncontrollably at this point, even though I know she is hot with desire as I grind more firmly into her. I kiss her neck softly, purring a "Ya Mon," into her ear before continuing my production.

"My feet is my only carriage,  
So I've got to push on through…"

I slip my hand into her robe and press my fingers firmly against her wet center, inwardly congratulating my cleverness as I hear her gasp unexpectedly at the contact.

"But while I'm gone...

Everything's gonna be alright…  
Ev'rything's gonna be alright…"

I pull back as I begin stroking her folds gently.

"Sing with me babe," I urge her, watching her eyes flutter open, a lazy smile creeping up onto her soft pink lips.

"Ev'rything's gonna be alright…"

"Alright," she gasps.

"Ev'rything's gonna be alright…"

"Alright," she moans…

"Ev'rything's gonna be alright…"

"Alright," she repeats throatily.

"Ev'rything's gonna be alright…"

"Uh…alright…fuck," she murmurs as my fingers continue stroking her.

"No woman, no cry….  
No, no woman, no woman, no cry!  
Oh, my little baby, don't she'd no tears…  
No woman, no cry…

Her forehead is on my shoulder at this point, and I strengthen my hold on her as I enter her with the same two fingers that have just rendered her puddy in my arms.

My voice softens as I continue half singing, half whispering the rest of my little invention into her ear.

"Say, say, said I remember when we used to sit…  
In a soft pink bedroom in LA…  
Obba, obba, serving the hypocrites…  
As they would mingle with the good people we meet…  
Good friends we have, oh, good friends we've lost…  
Along the way…  
In this great future,  
You can't forget your past  
So dry your tears, I say…"

She is practically limp against me at this point, but her hips are rocking slowly against my hand, and I feel her begin to tighten around me. I grip her tightly and pull her hips down hard on my hand.

"No woman no cry, no woman no cry…  
Little darling, don't she'd no tears, no woman no cry…  
Everything 's gonna be alright, everything 's gonna be alright…"

She cums hard on my hand and I slow my ministrations before withdrawing completely and taking her more lovingly in my arms.

"Everything 's gonna be alright, everything 's gonna be alright…  
Everything 's gonna be alright, everything 's gonna be alright  
Everything 's gonna be alright, everything 's gonna be alright..

Don't cry woman…"

As the last lyrics leave my lips, they are literally a whisper, and though this moment started as goofing around, feeling her now swaying tenderly against my body, I cannot help but hold her tightly to me as I rub her back tenderly and kiss her temple over and over again, helping her to come down from her high and to relax fully into me.

I feel her shake her head a few times into my neck before she lifts it slowly to meet my serious gaze.

"You feel Irie, baby?" I ask her huskily before capturing her delicate lips in a soft kiss.

"I feel more than Irie," she breathes out as her fingers trace through the partial dreads that inspired the whole crazy idea. "But you still need to wash this mess," she informs me.

I chuckle softly before kissing her again. "Well then come on and help me, cause I think the hair on my back has dreads too, and I cannot reach it," I tease as I take her hand and lead her to the bathroom.

"Ash, you don't have any hair on your…"

I cut her off with a challenging glare as I turn the water on and check the temperature.

"Spence, back hair…

_Kiss_.

"Dreads…"

_Kiss and removal of robe._

"Help…"

…

"So…you ready to finally learn?" I raise an eyebrow, challenging at the girl standing in the living room in her brown and white striped bikini, a sarong wrapped loosely around her waist, looking absolutely delicious with damp hair from our earlier shower.

"I'm nervous," she admits shyly as she finishes packing our beach tote with sunscreen, towels, and her latest book.

I grab her wrist firmly as she begins to drop the book into the bag.

"You are NOT reading another one of those Twilight pieces of crap today," I insist, pulling the paperback from the tote and tossing it on the coffee table. "Honestly, I am starting to think you'd rather have Jacob the werewolf in your bed than me," I practically pout as she fumbles for the book before shoving it back into her bag.

"Now, baby, why I would want a scary werewolf when I have my hairy-backed girlfriend next to me every night?" she replies cleverly as she raises an equally challenging eyebrow back to me.

_I hate it, and love it, when she uses my own humor against me. _

_She's a clever girl, my baby. _

"Spence, you are learning to surf today, like it or NOT," I insist as I grab the book again and hold it above my head, trying to ignore the adorable pout that has formed on her lips.

Had we not just spent the entire morning ravishing one another in bed, on the dance floor that was my bedroom, and then in the shower, I might be less resilient to that pout…

But seeing how I have made it my goal in life to teach her to surf before summer ends and she has to begin college, I force any and all dirty thoughts from my mind and simply smile tenderly back at her.

"Come on, baby doll. You won't regret this," I promise her as I grab her hand and pull her towards the front door before grabbing the board propped against the wall.

I turn back to find her smiling fondly at me as she re-adjusts the beach bag on her arms.

"No regret," she informs me with serious eyes as I pull her through the door.

…

"Honey, there's nothing to be scared of," I assure her as I tread water, resting my forearms against the board she is lying on.

She is gripping the board fully, as if on either side there is a thousand foot drop into liquid hot magma.

The tide is gentle and there is not a large wave in sight, but I see her legs and arms trembling with each rock the board makes.

"Ashley, I can't do this," she squeaks as the board rises and dips a few times over the softly breaking waves.

"Baby, you can do anything," I assure her gently as I pry her hands from the sides of the board and take them in mine. I am still hanging out in the water, my chin resting on the front of the board, as I squeeze both of her hands into mine. "Look at me," I command, keeping the evenness and softness in my voice as she opens her lids and rests her huge blue eyes on mine.

I feel a twinge of guilt in the fear I sense in her eyes, but I shake it from my body as I rub my hands up her arms and plant them firmly on her shoulders.

"Listen to me, Spence," I continue, keeping my voice as steady as I can, nodding reassuringly as I attempt to stay focused. "Babe, we're just going to ride out a few waves, get you used to the motion. You're not going to do anything you are not comfortable with, okay?"

I see the intrepidation begin to melt away at my words.

_She's heard them before after all. _

FLASHBACK.

We walk slowly into my bedroom, and I can see her body quivering in front of me as I follow her slowly to the back edge of the couch in the middle of my room. She turns and I am met with the biggest, most beautiful blur eyes I have ever seen.

_I've never seen blue like that…_

Those words repeat in my head as I rest the back of my legs against the couch and pull her to me. I stare deeply into her eyes as I bring my hands up to cup her face.

_I've never really kissed Spencer before. Not the way I can feel I am about to kiss her. _

I can feel my heart thudding in my chest as her arms come up and rest gently on each of my shoulders.

_I'm going to have a heart attack._

Shit.

_This moment…the one I have dreamt about for so long is never going to happen…_

_Cause, I, Ashley Davies, am going to die of a heart attach before I can even do what it is we came here to do. _

But then I feel soft lips against mine.

The softest lips I have ever had the pleasure of feeling against mine.

I open my eyes and realize her face is against mine, her eyes closed, her eyebrows furred in concentration.

And I relax.

Not because my heart has stilled or because I feel any less nervous about what is about to happen.

But because in that look of concentration, I see a girl.

The girl.

The girl I think I love.

The girl I think I love, who has never been with another girl.

The girl who needs me.

Needs me to show her what to do.

How wonderful this can be.

The girl who needs me to be loving and tender.

To protect her and make sure she is okay.

And in this moment, I feel a new sense of purpose.

This is not just some chick.

Some lay.

This is Spencer.

And this is going to be the single most important moment of her life.

And mine.

I watch as her eyes flutter open and lock on mine. I see the lust in her eyes, but I also see the fear.

And in this moment, I want nothing more than to make her feel like she is in the safest, most secure moment she could ever be in.

That she can trust me.

That I would never hurt her.

I take her hand and lead her to the edge of my bed. We sit down slowly, still staring deeply in one another's eyes. I reach up to brush her hair gently from her face and tuck a few pieces behind her ear.

Leaning in, I place a soft, slow, delicate kiss on her lips. I feel her relax a bit as both my arms come up to wrap around her back, urging her to sink down onto the bed.

I shift us a bit so that she is lying beneath me. I urge her to scoot up the length of the bed so her head can rest against the pillows.

She is shaking almost violently at this point, and I feel my heartbeat go into overdrive.

I am so overwhelmed.

I have never been so overcome with lust but filled with so much pressure to do everything just right.

I shift again so that I am hovering over her. She is still in her soft gray tank top with spaghetti straps, and her tight, light-colored jeans.

I am still in my low-cut, black tank, my bra peeking over the top, my own designer jeans suddenly feeling very tight and restrictive as I rest down over the length of her body. I have my arms positioned on each side of her head and I am staring down intently into her eyes.

I bring my left hand up to caress her cheek gently, trying to ease her nervousness with each stroke, never letting my intense gaze leave her.

I watch her take in a long, unsteady breath as her eyes shut momentarily beneath my touch.

"Spencer," I whisper softly, forcing her eyes to open and fix back on me. "Hey," I nod as I kiss her forehead lovingly.

"Yeah?" She asks unsteadily as she bites her lower lip before releasing it and giving me the sweetest smile I have ever seen in my life.

"Spencer, you are not going to do anything you are not comfortable with, okay?" I assure her, nodding again as my soft caresses to her face still and I grip her more firmly by the cheek, forcing her to look directly at me.

"I know, Ash," she chokes out and I feel my heart still for a moment before it begins to thud against the bones of my ribcage again.

"Spence, just trust me, please..."

I feel the desperation in my voice, and it actually catches me off guard.

And it must have caught her off guard, because I see the fear and hesitation completely melt away from her beautiful face.

"Ash, I trust you with my life."

She says this so honestly that I cannot help but feel tears sting my eyes as I lean down and press my lips against hers, more softly and sincerely than I have ever done to anyone in my life. I feel her body tense for a split second and then relax before she forces me to deepen the kiss, her arms pulling my body tightly to hers.

And just then, I feel something that surprises and delights me. She rocks her hips up into me and lets out a moan that comes so deeply from inside her that it sends a steady hum throughout my entire body.

And at that moment, I know she wants this as much as I do.

I finally let myself relax fully onto her. My lips meld into hers forcefully but still gently as our bodies continue the rocking motion that began with the simple thrust of her hips just moments ago.

I hear her breathing become more labored as her hands strengthen the grip they have on my back. She feels so warm and soft against my body and I am momentarily in shock at the feeling.

I feel her tongue begin to trace along my lower lip and I lose all control of my kisses as my mouth parts just enough to welcome her warm, soft tongue inside.

Her soft fingertips begin to trace the skin that has become exposed between the top of my jeans and the bottom of the black tank I have on.

Our movements against one another are becoming more urgent, and in turn, both of our tanks have begun to slide up our torsos.

For the first time, I feel her warm, soft skin against my own as our stomachs meet.

I fight to remain in control of myself, knowing she needs me to control this, to show her how to do this, to teach her how to become intimate with a girl.

But at the same time, I am realizing that I, Ashley Davies, have no idea how to be intimate like THIS, with a girl.

Because my body is so warm, humming steadily in a way it NEVER has, and we are still fully clothed.

"Spencer," I moan into her mouth, opening my eyes, to be met with blue eyes full of longing and still some unsureness.

"What, Ash," she whispers as I begin to tug on the hem of her tank top.

"I am going to take this off, okay?" I duck my head, shocked at my shyness, as I begin to pull it up her trembling stomach.

As I successfully rid her of the garment, I feel her bring her hands from my back and grab both of my wrists. And until she did that, I did not realize how badly my hands were shaking.

"Ashley, you don't have to ask for permission," she assures me before releasing my wrists and bringing her hands around to my back before pulling my own tank over my head. "You don't have to ask for permission for anything. I trust you, Ashley. With everything."

Those words feel like a hand that has just reached into my chest and wrapped around my heart.

_What is this girl doing to me? _

_How did this happen? _

"Spencer, I…I…" I swallow hard and fix my eyes on hers again.

"Shhh…Ash, don't ruin this with things that don't need to be said…yet…"

She nods her head slowly and a soft smile overcomes her sweet face. "Please, Ash…"

I choke back all emotions and words that are bubbling to the surface and simply smile lovingly back down at her innocence.

She is absolutely trembling at this point, and all urges I have had all along to protect her, make her feel safe and warm and good, come flooding back to the surface. I lean back down and take her lips in my own, this time more greedily as our tongues automatically find one another. I feel her hips begin to rock again, and we find a steady rhythm against one another as I reach around and fumble nervously with the claps of her bra.

_Get it together, Davies. _

Moving my lips from hers, I begin peppering her cheek and neck with soft, sweet kisses as my hands steady and I successfully unclasp her bra and pull it from her.

I lift my head for a second so that I can look at her.

She is staring up at me with the most innocent yet lustful look, and I shake my head for a second, utterly amazed that I am lying her with this girl, like this.

She nods her head again, clearly encouraging me to continue with what it is I am trying to do.

I take a long steady breath, and slowly bring my hand up to graze her ribcage. I hear her sigh beneath my touch and it gives me a shot of courage.

I slowly trace the same fingers up so that I am cupping one of her perfect breasts in my shaking hand. I take a moment to really look at her.

Her breasts are smaller than mine, but not in a bad way. They are perfect, milky white mounds, with the most beautiful pink nipples in the center. And though I have yet to touch them, they are already apparently hard.

_Am I doing this?_

_Am I causing this reaction?_

_Does she really want me the way I do her?_

_God, get it together!_

I let my fingertips graze one of the hardended pink peaks and smile in delight as my touch cases her to moan, and her hips to buck against me again.

She pulls her head up just enough to meet my eyes again, and the look in those amazing blue pools is enough to convince me finally that she is ready, and that I have nothing to be afraid of.

I prop myself up to the left of her head and let my fingers trace slowly over her nipple, reveling in how hot her body has become, how warm she feels beneath me, and how clearly excited she is.

I twist the nipple I have been working on between my thumb and forefinger a few more times, before I feel myself become more daring

I kiss her deeply for a while, before letting my tongue exit my mouth fully, tracing it down her jaw line, down her soft neck. I take in her scent, of which I can only describe as soap and vanilla and absolute perfection.

Not letting myself get to lost in her tantalizing smell, I continue to work down her neck before peppering her collar bone with wet, open-mouthed kisses, taking in every soft gasp and moan as my mouth finally hovers over the top of her breast.

"Ashley, I'm ready," she assures me softly as my eyes avert down to her stomach. It is truly trembling at this point and I give myself a mental pep talk as I dip just enough lower to engulf her nipple in my warm, wet mouth.

And the reaction I receive from this simple movement causes my body to shift into overdrive. I quickly fumble with the button on her jeans, and lower the zipper.

I am not sure my hand is even attached to my body as I lower her jeans down her soft but toned legs. I watch her body react to every movement, every touch, every kiss, every suck, as I rid her of not only her jeans but the pink panties underneath.

Wanting this to be about her, but still wanting to feel more of my flesh against her, I pull my lips from her delicate breasts and quickly rid myself of my own jeans and bra, leaving my own black thong in place, not wanting her to think she has to reciprocate anything tonight.

_How do I do what I am about to do and still make her feel safe and loved?_

The pressure is building, especially since she is pulling my body on top of hers and her hips are continuing to gyrate against mine, her breathing more labored than it has been thus far.

"Ash, I am ready. I cannot tell you this with any more clarity. I am ready for you."

I let my eyes trace down her innocent face, her elongated neck, filled with red marks from the assault I have apparently had on it, her perfect white breasts and hardened pink nipples, her soft but toned and trembling stomach, down to her slowly gyrating hips, to the place of hers that I never thought I would see, much less touch.

And as I slowly trace fingertips down her stomach until I land just above the place I want to be, and where I really think she wants me to be, I look at her, deeply and tenderly, before dipping lower.

And the cries that escape her lips when I finally reach that place let me know that after all this time, of staring longingly at her across the halls at school, of lying next to her in my bed watching movies, ignoring the heat radiating from her onto my own body, of watching her lips when she talks, losing all comprehension of the words coming from them, of being in love with her since she knocked my coffee cup out of my hands and apologized in vain for bothering me…

I no longer have any doubt in my mind.

Spencer and I are meant to be.

And I will spend all night making her feel just that...

…

_Oh God, where did I go?_

I re-focus on the blond on the surf board in front of me.

And the blue of her eyes that makes the ocean seem a murky mess locks on me.

"Okay, babe. I can do this," she assures me confidently.

I let go of her hands and paddle backwards as the tide rushes in.

And Spencer pushes herself from a lying position on the board to her knees, and then to slightly trembling legs.

And for about six and a half seconds, Spencer surfs.


	7. Need More Exercise

Chapter 7: Need More Exercise

Spencer's POV

"Do you think we have too much sex?"

We are both in the bathroom, washing our face and brushing out teeth before bed.

And we've already had sex today…three times.

Once this morning when Ashley woke me up with a little surprise.

And then again before lunch when I made the 'mistake' of telling her how hungry I was.

And again about five minutes ago.

I glance at her reflection in the mirror and her expression can only be described as completely blank.

"Ash…?"

She spits the white foam into the sink, apparently in an attempt to save herself from choking on it.

"What did you say?" she manages to get out between rinsing her mouth with water from the faucet.

"I'm just wondering, do you think we have sex too often?"

He expressionless face shifts to one plenty full of expression.

And this particular expression is telling me she thinks I am one-hundred percent insane.

"Do I think we have sex too much?" She dramatically repeats as if she is becoming physically ill by simply uttering such a thought.

"Well, you know what I mean Ash," I continue as I blot my face dry with a wash cloth and turn towards the bedroom.

Climbing between the sheets, I turn to find her standing in the doorway, as if she doesn't know where she is or who I am.

"Um…are you coming to bed babe?"

"Do I think we have sex too much?" she repeats again, the look on her face now what can only be described as one of sheer horror.

"Oh for God's sake, Ash, come to bed and let me explain what I mean." I pull the covers back and signal for her to take her place on the left side. While she slowly makes her way around the front of the bed, I set the alarm clock, assuring myself that tomorrow we are not staying in bed until eleven, but we are going to get up and jog on the beach and get some sunbathing in.

Ashley pauses one more time as she reaches her side of the bed and I can practically hear the gears grinding inside her head.

She is likely thinking of how she is going to convince me that not only do we not have too much sex, we don't have enough.

I turn to face her, propping my head on one arm as she parrots my position.

"Do you not like having sex with me?" she pouts, causing me to chuckle and reach over to grab her free hand.

"Oh, baby, you are very, very aware of just how much I love having sex with you. In fact, Kyla knows….and Glen knows…and your neighbors below, I am pretty sure they know. Hell, Paula Carlin knows…"

I watch her cringe and I know she is remembering the look on my mom's face when she came home way too early from a shift at the hospital one Saturday afternoon to find us on the couch in the living room.

Correction.

I was on the couch.

Ashley, she was kneeling on the floor in front of it.

I couldn't look my mom in the eyes for at least a month.

"No, honey, it's not that. It's just that we have this amazing summer planned, and we're not exactly checking our to-do's off the list very quickly." I raise a challenging eyebrow at her.

"You learned to surf the other day," she boasts proudly as she raises a challenging eyebrow back at me.

"And after we had sex three times that morning alone, we had a very small amount of time in the water before we had to meet Kyla and Chelsey."

She opens her mouth to protest, but then closes it quickly realizing she has no real retort to that point.

_Round one goes to me. _

Taking advantage of my upper hand, I continue. "I mean, some days we don't get out of bed at all. This is the least tan I have been in years, and you're looking a little peaked yourself," I tease as I pull her tank top up to reveal her perfectly toned stomach, which suffice it to say, is much less brown than normal.

"Well, what do you want to do that we're not doing?" she continue to pout as she playfully bats my hand from her stomach.

"I don't know…jog on the beach in the mornings, go to concerts, surf more, go to the farmers' market, take pictures, hike, bike along the boardwalk, volunteer somewhere, write each other love poems…" I smirk at the last remark, intertwining my fingers with hers again.

"You want me to write you a poem?" she asks flatly as the blankness creeps back into her brown eyes.

"Maybe I do," I inform her seriously as I bring her hand to my lips and give her a soft kiss to the inside of her wrist. "And we need to exercise more, babe."

"What are you talking about? Sex is great exercise."

_I knew she was going to say that. _

"Ash, it's not real exercise, seriously," I inform her sternly as I place a kiss to her palm.

"Oh really! Then why are we always sweaty, winded and sometimes even sore afterwards?"

_I knew she might say that too._

"You know what I mean," I sigh as I scoot across the bed and nuzzle into her side. "I bet we haven't gone a day without having sex since I moved in," I inform her as I place a few kisses to her collar bone.

"Oh come on, sure we have…I mean…hmmmm…" Her voice trails off and I look up at her face, which is pursed in concentration, apparently trying to come up with the day we abstained.

When she realizes her labor is soon to be fruitless, she slides the arm that was propping her head up under me and pulls me to her chest and she sinks back onto her pillow. She begins stroking my back with her fingertips, and despite my best attempts, I feel myself start to grow a little hot beneath her touch.

"So what, you think we cannot go a day without having sex?" I hear a challenge in her voice as I look up at her again.

"Probably not," I retort as I swing a leg over her hips and snuggle deeper into her.

"Sure we can," she states with a bit of finality as her fingers work their way under my tank and she continues stroking me, causing goosebumps to form all over.

I bury my face into her neck and begin biting and nibbling her soft skin. Hearing her moan loudly, I roll over until I am fully on top of her.

"Tomorrow," she whispers through gritted teeth as grabs me by the back of my head and pulls me down to her.

…

I wake up in the morning to feel her pressed firmly against my back, her arms around me and her face against the back of my neck. I can feel her even breathing against my skin and I know she is not awake yet. Just then, the alarm clock begins to beep obnoxiously at us.

No wonder we rarely set this stupid thing.

I feel her begin to stir behind me as her hand slips inside my tank top and begins caressing my stomach.

_Oh God._

"Good morning, baby," I whisper as I turn to face her.

"Mmmm….good morning," she murmurs against my lips as she kisses me deeply. She slides on top of me, resting one thigh between my legs as she continues kissing me passionately. I feel her thigh begin to move against my center and I feel immediate wetness flood from me.

"Uhhhh….good….morning," I moan as she presses more firmly against me. My arms come up to grip her ass in an attempt to pull her even tighter against me, desperately in need of something to release the ache I am now feeling between my legs.

We are both wearing thin cotton shorts with nothing underneath, and the friction that is being created through the thin layers is starting to make me feel like I am on fire from the waist down.

I tighten my grip and try to pull her deeper into me. Just then, she stills her hips against mine and pulls her head back. Giving me a chaste kiss, she hops up off of my still writhing body and off of the bed completely.

_What_?

"Ash…" I protest as the ache between my legs grows exponentially.

"Come on, babe…let's go for a jog on the beach. It's the perfect time…not too hot yet, you know?" She yanks her tank off and replaces it with a black sports bra.

I, on the other hand, am totally paralyzed and don't think I could run from the bedroom to the bathroom much less down the beach right now.

Replacing her gray shorts with a pair of black panties and super short black running shorts, she turns to find me in the same position she left me in.

"Spence, you okay?" She asks with mock concern as she grabs my hand and starts to pull me from the bed.

"Yeah…I just, uh…" She grins at me as she pulls her hair into a pony tail and then reaches for some socks.

"You just what?" Her innocent act continues as she walks into the closet to retrieve her tennis shoes.

"Nothing," I mutter as I open the drawer and fish out some work out clothes of my own.

"Alright, babe, meet you in the kitchen," she practically sings as she disappears through the beads.

…

"Whew! It's a hot one out there today!" she shouts as we walk through the door after our morning jog. "Good run, huh?"

As she says this, she slowly removes her blue tank top and uses it to blot dry the sweat on her forehead.

"Yeah, felt great," I respond as my eyes travel over her back side. I can see beads of perspiration all over her toned body, and a drop slowly sliding right down the split in the center of her back.

"Stretch it out, baby, so your muscles don't get tight," she instructs as she bends over to touch her toes. Slowly easing her hands to the ground, she presses her palms against the ground and I hear her let out a soft groan.

She is very limber.

Taking a seat on the floor in the middle of the living room, I attempt to avert my eyes from her as I begin stretching myself out. I hear her groan again and cannot help but glance up.

Her back is still to me, and now she has her legs spread wider and is bending down and pulling her arms through her legs. And I can see the bottom of both of her tight ass checks peeking out of the bottom of her shorts.

I can also see every muscle in her body rippling with each stretch she makes…her calves, her hamstrings, her triceps and lats.

_God she has an awesome body._

_And God I need a cold shower. _

_What was I thinking?_

…

"Where's Kyla?" I ask as I join Ashley on the couch later that evening.

After a long, semi-cold shower, Ashley dragged me to the farmers' marker to get some fresh veggies…and then to a poetry reading at a local book store…and then to sign up to volunteer at Kyla's soup kitchen.

After some homemade supreme pizza we made using many of the veggies we had picked up at the market, she suggested we watch a movie before bed.

"She's at Aiden's," she informs me, without looking up from the television.

_Really? Is this some kind of sick joke? _

Normally when we get the text that Kyla's not coming home, it takes us about five seconds to get our clothes off.

"Huh, she's been staying over there quite a bit more these days…"

"Mmm huh," she responds with a complete lack of interest in my observation.

Sliding down onto the couch, I kick off my sandals and pull my knees under me as I snuggle into her. "What are we watching?" I ask as the previews continue, and I observe they seem a little more outdated that what I am used to seeing on the rest of our DVD collection.

"It's called 'Bound'," she informs me as she shifts so she is lying on her back with her head on the arm rest, pulling me so I am lying on top of her.

"Never heard of it."

I settle onto her chest as the previews end and the movie begins.

_Oh._

_My. _

_GOD._

…

"You are mean," I inform her as we slide into bed.

My legs are still practically numb from lying on top of Ashley while watching what it is I just watched those hot women do in that movie she innocently selected from the movie store we stopped at on our way home from our outings earlier.

"Whatever do you mean, baby?" she asks innocently as she reaches over to flip on her bedside lamp before reaching for her book.

"You know exactly what I mean," I scold her, trying to calm the aching that has not left since about twenty minutes into that damn movie.

"You didn't like the movie?" She continues to feign ignorance as she sets her book back down and turns towards me.

I grit my teeth and growl at her, attempting to make my distaste of her shenanigans this entire day known.

"Honey, you okay over there?" She raises a 'concerned' eyebrow as she begins stroking my arm softly…just soft enough to leave goosebumps in the wake.

I flip over and turn my back to her, pressing my legs together and feeling the need to cross them to relieve the pressure I am feeling.

She flips off her lamp and slides over to me, wrapping her arms around me and pulling my back against her stomach. Her hand slides around and begins to stroke my stomach under my t-shirt. I feel my body temperature rise about a hundred degrees as she begins kissing my shoulder, slowly and deeply, letting her tongue flick out and lick between wet kisses.

"Night baby," she whispers as she pulls me more firmly into her.

"Oh fuck it!" I cry as I turn around and crash my lips into hers.

I roll her on her back and straddle her hips. I yank my t-shirt over my head before grabbing her hands and covering my breasts with them.

"Spencer…what are you doing babe? We're not supposed to do this today," she says way too smugly as I start to grind my hips back and forth over her, feeling her knees come up behind me to support my back.

"Ashley, shut up and fuck me," I command.

And she does.

Maybe we'll try again tomorrow.


	8. Top Shelf

Chapter 8: Top Shelf

Ashley's POV

"We should go out," I announce as we are standing in the kitchen, cleaning the dinner dishes.

"Out?" she questions as she starts the dishwasher.

"Yeah, out. We haven't been to Gray's in forever. Let's get out drink on and then our dance on, babe." I stare hopefully at her before thrusting my ass out behind and slapping it a few times, and then giving her a few hip thrusts for good measure.

"Are you going to dance like that?" she asks with a serious expression.

"Hell yeah! And I will do a little of this…" I turn my back to her and glance at her over my left shoulder as I shake my ass as fast as I can.

"You have no booty," she informs me flatly.

I fake hurt as I give it a few more slaps. She giggles at this, despite the fact I can tell she is trying not to.

Taking this as a promising sign, I walk into the living room and retrieve a bottle of Patron from the top shelf of the liquor cabinet. I walk back towards the kitchen and begin to do a little salsa move as I move straight towards her, holding the tequila seductively in front of me.

"Oh, God, Ash…not 'ta-kill-ya'," she chides as her face contorts in disgust.

"Text the gang and tell them Gray's in two hours," I insist as I search the refrigerator for a lime.

"Two hours?!" she exclaims as she fumbles for her cell. "Why two hours?"

"Cause they never serve us at Gray's…so I figure you and I have a little pre-partying to do before we get there."

I have finished slicing the lime into wedges, and have poured two shot glasses of the Patron.

She has fired off a group text to Glen, Chelsey, Aiden, Kyla and Madison before setting her phone on the counter.

I move towards her and lean in to lick her from her collar bone to under her ear. I feel her shudder as I start to shake salt along the wet path I have left.

She meets my stare and her eyes seem to darken as I place a lime wedge in her mouth. I drag my tongue back across her salty neck, pausing when I reach her ear, and giving it a short nibble before pulling back and staring her directly in the eyes.

I then slam my first shot.

I THEN attempt to control the urge to either spit it out or simply puke all over.

Finally, I force myself to swallow, attempting to keep the seductive look on my face.

She raises her eyebrows a little before emphasizing the lime wedge she is holding firmly between her teeth. I pull her to me by her waist and run my tongue over the sour wedge before capturing it, and her lips, fully in my mouth. I pull the lime from her grip, holding my mouth against her as I let my tongue explore her mouth for a few seconds before pulling back. I take in as much lime juice as I can, and then remove the wedge from my own mouth.

"Yummy," I inform her as I smack my lips a few times.

"Yeah, you like that?" she teases as she kisses me again, letting her tongue taste the flavors of the liquor and salt and lime that are dancing throughout my entire mouth. "Mmmmm, very yummy," she whispers as she pulls back.

"Your turn, baby," I inform her as I lift the shot glass to her and secure a lime wedge into my own mouth.

…

"I can't find my shoes…"

"Huh?" 

"Ash, I can't find my shoes…"

"Spence, they're on your feet."

"Oh, ha, they are…" She shakes her head at me before throwing me a toothy grin.

And I remember by girl really cannot hold her liquor.

"Hey, the cab is here…come on babe…"

I take her hand and we kinda stumble through the front door and to the elevator. Once inside, I hit the 'L' button before she slams me hungrily into the back wall of the elevator and begins placing hot wet kisses all over my face and neck.

"Baby, stop that. We gotta go get our dance on, girl." I grind into her a few times and she almost falls backwards. I grab her by the waist and steady her before slowing my movements, pulling her into an impromptu slow dance. "I wanna dance all night with you, babe," I whisper as I bury my head in her neck. I feel her go a little limp in my arms before the elevator dings and we arrive in the lobby.

I spin her through the lobby a few clumsy times before we burst out into the night air and climb into the cab. Just then, her cell phone goes off, signaling a text.

"It's Glen. He's there…and he wants to know where the 'fuck' we are." She uses air-quotes at the one profane word and then giggles.

I grab her phone and quickly text back that we are on our way. Pulling her against me, I give her a quick kiss.

"I'm gonna rock your body, to the break of day," she sings enthusiastically and she throws her hands in the air.

_Oh, tequila…_

…

Gray's is absolutely hopping when we arrive and it takes us a good twenty minutes to stumble around the bar before we locate the gang at a table in the back.

"Woo hooo!" Spencer cries as she does what can only be described as the 'choo choo train' as she descends upon the table.

"Oh yeah, bitches!" I cry as I turn around, stick it out, and slap my ass a few times.

"What…the….hell?"

That would be Glen, though the rest of our friends are staring at us with about the same amount of disbelief.

"Are you guys ripped?" Aiden yells over the music. Just then, the song changes.

"Oh shit, good song! Come on babe!" I shout as I grab her hand and drag her onto the dance floor, leaving our stunned friends behind.

"I put my hand upon your hip, when I dip, you dip we dip!" I sing as we follow the instructions of the song.

"You put your hand upon my hip, when you dip, I dip, we dip."

That's Spencer.

And yes, we've done this little number before.

We're both laughing, singing and dancing wildly, grinding against one another, and kissing here and there when a break in our singing allows it.

Aiden, Kyla, Glen and Chelsey have joined us on the dance floor, and I see Madison off in the distance, shaking her thing with some guy I've never seen before.

"You guys smell like a tequila distillery," Glen calls out over the music.

Spencer leans towards her brother and pointedly blows her Patron breath right in his face.

"Oh God Spence! That's disgusting!" he whines as he waves his hand over his nose.

I laugh hysterically as she turns her proud but droopy drunk eyes back in my direction.

"That's my baby," I reward her as I pull her into my gyrating hips as my favorite rappers of all time come blaring over the dance floor.

"Oh…"

"Shit…" she finishes for me and I smile as I wrap my hands around her hips and we continue to bump and grind to the tunes.

"1, 2, 3 and to tha 4, Snoop Spencer Dog and Dr. Davies at tha door…"

"You guys are complete tools!" Glen shouts.

We, on the other hand, think, at this moment, we are lyrical masters.

Well, we at least think we are totally hilarious.

"I have to pee soooo bad," Spencer informs me as she does a little 'pee-pee' dance."

"You want me to go with you?" I shout as Kyla give me a few sideways hip bounces.

"NO, baby, its okay. I'll be right back," she assures me as she plants a very sloppy kiss to my lips.

"K, babe. I'll meet you back here. Maybe grab us a water, okay?"

"Don't go chasin waterfalls…" she begins singing to me with the most serious look on her face.

"Please stick to tha rivers and tha lakes that you're used to," I join.

"Oh, GOD I have to pee," she interjects into our song as she grabs her crotch and turns towards the bathroom.

I turn back and find myself circled by the rest of the group.

"You guys are a real treat when you get drunk together," Kyla informs me as we all start doing the 'Humpty Dance.'

"They are tools," Glen repeats for the second time.

"Hey, Glen!" I shout above the music.

I hold one hand in the air and point, raising my eyebrows, emphasizing each word of 'I once got busy in a Burger King Bathroom."

And then interjecting "with your sister." I raise an eyebrow at him, challenging him to call his sister and I tools again.

He just shakes his head in disgust and pulls Chelsey to the bar.

Kyla and Aiden are laughing at my antics and I just proudly spin around with my arms above my head, continuing to rock to the music.

"We're going to the bar, too, Ash. You want anything?" Aiden asks as he and Kyla link hands.

"No, but if you see Spence, remind her to get us some water," I respond and they nod and head off through the crowd.

Just then, Genuine's 'Pony' come on.

I fucking love this song, and I love it when Gray's plays the old school stuff.

I let my hips dip low as I pretend to ride my own pony, my eyes closed, and my body getting swept away by the bump of the bass.

Just then I feel two arms wrap around me and pull me back. I rest into a soft, female body and feel two hands rest on my hips. I allow myself to press my ass back into her front a few times before reaching one arm back and wrapping it around the back of her head. I inhale deeply, and the scent of cucumber and melon fills my nostrils.

_Oh. _

_Shit._

_That's not vanilla and soap. _

_And this ain't Spencer. _

I whip around and find a moderately attractive redhead staring back at me with seductive eyes.

"Hey sexy," she flirts and I shake my head and take another few steps back.

"Shit, I thought you were someone…"

"What the fuck!"

_AND… there she is…_

I turn to find my beautiful but somewhat inebriated girlfriend standing a few feet away, looking furious, and…well inebriated.

"Spence, it's not what it looks like," I assure her as I start to move towards her.

She just looks me straight in the eyes, anger changing quickly to hurt, as she spins on her heels and takes off across the bar.

"Spencer!" I cry as I chase after her. I see her heading straight for the door. I pause quickly at the table.

"I think we're leaving," I mutter quickly before continuing the chase. I hear Kyla start to protest but I don't have time to explain any further.

I burst through the front doors of the club and into the night air. I glance around frantically and find her hailing a cab. Shoving people out of my way, I grab the cab door just as she is closing it and fling it open, throwing myself inside and closing the door behind me.

"Spencer, baby…" I am out of breath and I cannot say anything else as she turns her back to me and stares out the window.

I give the cabbie our address before turning back to her, scooting right up next to her and grabbing her arm gently.

"Spence, look at me," I urge her as she shakes her head a few times.

"Honey, that all looked really bad, I am sure, but…"

"Is that what you want? You want to go out and grind on girls at the bars? Is that why you drug me out tonight? SO you could go pick up on that disease-ridden whore?!" Her words are slurred and her head is still facing away from me.

"God, NO, Spence. Honey, that girl came up behind me. I thought it was you for a few minutes, I swear!" I reach up and cup her cheek, forcing her to turn her face to me.

And I am saddened when I see she has tears pouring from her huge blue eyes. "Spencer…" I whisper as I begin brushing the tears away almost desperately with my thumbs. "You know me better than that," I continue softly, pulling her towards me a pressing my forehead against hers. "We've had too much to drink…" I nod my head at her and she sighs loudly before closing her eyes.

"I don't feel good," she mutters as she buries her head in my shoulder.

"We're almost home, baby," I assure her as I stroke her sweaty forehead and kiss her tenderly on her temple.

As promised, we pull up to the front of the complex about ten minutes later. I throw some cash at the cabbie and run around so that I can help Spencer out of the cab. She is dripping wet and her eyes are barely open.

I feel nausea sweep over my own body as I wrap my arms around her and help walk her into the building and into the elevator.

Once safely inside our apartment, I start to guide her to our room and ease her gently onto the bed. I undress her gently, down to her panties only, and slide the cool sheets over her still damp body. I change quickly into a pair of shorts and a cut-off t-shirt, and then move quickly to the bathroom to wet a washcloth and fill a water glass.

Turning out the lights, I crawl in and prop myself up on an elbow next to her as I run the cold washcloth over her forehead.

"You okay, Spencer?" I whisper as I lean in and give her a few gentle kisses to her forehead.

"I'm sorry, baby," she mumbles as she brings one arm up over her eyes.

"Don't be sorry. I'm sorry I made us drink so many tequila shots. That was stupid."

I bring the cloth down and run it along her chest and neck a few times. She removes her arm from over her eyes and turns to me. I can see the blue, even in the dark.

"It was fun, though. I am just a lightweight, and a jealous drunk. I'm sorry, Ash. I acted like a maniac." I can see she is misting up a little and the last think I want is for her to cry.

Spencer tends to cry sometimes when she gets drunk.

_Yeah, she's not the greatest drunk. _

_Tequila shots were a great idea_.

"Baby girl, don't apologize to me again. I'm sorry about fire crotch."

She giggles at this before sighing as I move the wash cloth over her shoulders and down each arm. "That's a terrible thing to say," she scolds me.

"You called her a disease-ridden whore," I remind her seriously, causing her to giggle again.

She starts to nuzzle into me and I lean back and pull her fully into my arms, running the cool cloth up and down her back.

"I didn't mean to ruin our night. We were having so much fun," she mumbles as she kisses my chest a few times.

I pull her more tightly to me and bury my nose into her hair, inhaling deeply.

Vanilla, soap, a little sweat, and yeah…a little liquor…

But still Spencer.

"You know…" I whisper as I bend down and place a long, deep kiss on her sweaty forehead. "This isn't so bad either."

And I think we're gonna leave that top shelf tequila just there…on the top shelf…at least for a while.


	9. Stolen

Chapter 9: Stolen

Ashley's POV

"Where the fuck is my I-Pod?" I yell, jumping a bit at my own voice as it echoes throughout the high ceilings of our loft.

"Did you check your backpack?" Spencer responds calmly, glancing up at me from over the latest issue of _US Weekly_.

"Of course I checked my backpack," I snap before mumbling under my breath.

"Don't be bitchy."

I glance at her, my face in a scowl, only to be met with stern eyes.

"It's been stolen. My I-pod's been stolen. I bet it happened at the beach," I insist, failing to apologize for my 'bitchiness'.

"Ash, it isn't stolen. Check the dresser in our room," she suggests, still calmly but with a certain coolness that was not present before.

"I already did, Spence! It's been stolen! Mother Fucker!" I shout as I slam my hand on the kitchen counter.

"Jesus, Ashley! Calm down!"

And SHE'S no longer calm.

No, she is now standing in front of me, shaking her head in disapproval at my tantrum.

"You calm down!" I retort maturely.

_I know you are, but what am I?_ suddenly fills my inner thoughts.

"Ashley Davies, knock it off!" she shouts as she begins storming around the loft, opening and shutting drawers as she goes.

And by opening and shutting, I mean yanking and slamming.

"I have like five-hundred dollars worth of music on that thing, SPEN-CER!"

Not sure why I had to emphasize her name, but I did.

"Oh, I am SO sorry, princess. I forgot how poor you are. However will you recover from such a financial devastation?"

_Ok, now she's pissed me off. _

"Oh, no, I am the one who is sorry," I reply, sarcasm dripping. "I will let you know how I recover once I sign the check for this month's mortgage and finish paying the bills."

_Oh shit._

_Did I really just say that?_

I slowly turn to face her, sheer terror racing through my body in anticipation of her reaction.

And I cannot claim surprise when I see the hurt spread all over her face.

"Fuck you, Ashley." Her face is hard though her lower lip is quivering.

She's never said those words to me before, and although I completely deserve them, they sting nonetheless.

"Spence…"

"NO!" She exclaims, cutting me off abruptly.

Her hands are fumbling for her keys and her purse and I move quickly towards her in an effort to stop what I know is about to happen.

She's going to storm out.

'Fuck you'… no, never before, but storming out…

Eh…maybe a few times since we got together.

"Spencer, I'm sorry…" I manage to squeak out as her hand is on the door.

She yanks it open, but then surprises me by turning back towards me.

_Thank God_, I sigh inwardly.

_Oh…wait…_

_NOPE. _

She brushes past me and yanks the side zipper of my backpack open before fishing around inside.

And shortly thereafter, out pops my I-Pod.

_The side pocket. _

_Damnet. _

_Didn't think of that one. _

She gives me another deserved glare before tossing it on couch.

"Guess you can call the LAPD and tell them the search is off," she spits smugly. "Oh, and don't forget to tell them you want to drop the charges," she finishes flatly before slamming the door behind her.

And me, I am just left standing in the center of the living room, dumbfounded.

I am such an ass.

And I know what my problem is.

Its mid-August, and our summer of bliss is coming to an end. Spencer will start college in a week, and as much as I hate to admit it, I am a little jealous, and a lot insecure.

And now, standing here alone in our home, feeling like a horse's ass, staring at my I-Pod, I am fairly confident that simply confiding my fears to Spencer, rather than acting like a lunatic, might have been the better approach.

I reach for my cell phone and try to call her.

Shocker.

She does not pick up.

SO…now I wait.

…

It's getting pretty late, and I have not heard from Spencer. She's ignored approximately seven calls and not responded to around 11 text messages.

And those are really exact numbers more so than approximations.

And I am really starting to worry.

And I am really feeling worse and worse with each second that ticks slowly by.

_Where is she?_

I get so desperate I actually call Glen.

"Ash, what's up, girl? I hear there's an armed robber roaming around your neighborhood."

_Asshole_.

"Glen, where is she?" My desperation to locate her actually renders me unable to find any suitable response to his little quip.

"She's here, Ashley. But not so sure she wants to talk to you right now. Sorry, Ash."

He actually sounds sympathetic, and I feel relief wash over me knowing she is with him.

"Okay, well will you please tell her to come home…or at least call me?"

I am actually a bit choked up, and I am sure he senses this, which causes him to become even more comforting, when I am sure he would rather continue to chide me for what an idiot I was earlier.

"Yeah, sure, Ashley. I will tell her. I will make her call you if she decides not to come home tonight."

I hear him whisper something, and can almost make out 'just talk to her'.

I then can clearly make out a 'No' from a female voice in the background.

"Glen?"

"Yeah, sorry Ashley. Yeah, she'll call you, okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, Glen," I whisper.

He continues to talk and I realize I am no longer listening to a word he is saying. I am only thinking about whether or not I should hop in my car and drive to the Carlin's and drag my girlfriend back home.

"Ashley? ASHLEY?"

_Huh, what? _

_Oh jeez where did I go?_

"Ashley, what's the matter? Cat burglar got your tongue?" 

_AND…he's back. _

"Sorry, Glen. Hey, just tell her I am sorry and I love her…will you do that? 

"Sure I will. Talk to you later. Okay?"

I hang up and sink dejectedly onto the couch. I flip on the television but pay no attention to the program.

Kyla's not even home, which is a condition I normally would not object to.

Don't get me wrong. I love that sister of mine, but lack of Kyla usually means a whole lot of Spencer.

But right now, it would be nice to have her here to talk to.

And to bitch slap me a little, cause I know I deserve it…

As if on cue, I hear a key in the lock and my lovely sister appears through the doorway.

She stops dead in her tracks at the site she is met with.

_Oh, did I mention that at this point, I am sobbing?_

_No? _

_Well I am. _

"Ashley, what's wrong?" she exclaims with genuine concern as she drops her purse on the coffee table and joins me on the couch.

I mutter incoherently through my tears, words like 'jackass' and 'Spencer' and 'I-Pod', before realizing that she is no closer to understanding the reason for my current state.

"Ashley, takes a few deep breaths, calm down, and start at the beginning.

And so, in that order, I do.

…

"Well, she'll call…or come home…I am sure of it, Ashley. She loves you, despite her better judgment." She nudges me softly and is able to pull a small smile from me.

"Yeah, I know she does. Foolish," I smirk as I nudge her back.

"Oh, hey, get this," she begins, clearly changing the subject, which I admit I am not too upset about. "There is going to be a KILLER party this Saturday on the beach." Her eyes are wide with excitement as she continues. "A couple of recent King High grads, who might have as much trust fund money as us, are throwing a 'summer's over and college is a-coming' bash…according to Aiden."

"Really…who is it?"

My interest is peaked.

I mean, as miserable as I have been all day, the idea of a beach-bash does have me feeling a little better…

"I don't know. A couple of dudes we apparently went to school with. Kyle and J.R.?" She looks at me as if I might possibly have kept track of the boys at King High.

Nope.

Mainly just the girls, and MAINLY just one girl.

"Huh…not sure. But who cares!"

She laughs in acknowledgement of how silly it was to assume I would know who these guys are.

"Well regardless, make up with Spencer so we can all go and have fun, okay?" she insists and I nod in agreement.

"I'll do everything in my power," I assure her before giving her a grateful hug.

…

Well…it's Saturday.

And of course, Spencer is home.

She came home that night, actually.

And we didn't have make-up sex.

Oh no.

We didn't really speak.

And the next few days were strained.

I had no idea she would be this hard.

Spencer is stubborn, and don't get me wrong, I know this much. But I have been graveling in my own little way for days, and she has only so much as given me a few chaste kisses at bedtime and when we'd part ways here and there.

And now we are standing in front of the mirror, doing our make-up and getting ready for Kyle and J.R.'s little soirée.

Yeah, at this rate I have a better chance of a meaningful conversation with those guys than my own girlfriend tonight.

_Sigh_.

"You look pretty," I attempt as I catch her eye in the mirror.

"Thanks. You too," she responds with a soft smile before averting her eyes from mine and continuing to apply mascara.

"I love you," I try again, a sheepish look creeping over my face as she glances sideways at me.

"I love you, too."

She moves the wand to her other eye, concentrating again on the application.

"You complete me."

And for the first time in three days, Spencer laughs.

…

I grab her hand as we walk down onto the beach, and thankfully she does not pull it away. We are a good couple hundred yards from the party, and the length of the walk offers me the most contact and intimacy I have had with her since the whole 'I-Pod incident'.

I actually think I feel her give my hand a gently squeeze as we descend on the crowd.

"Oh, sweet. A live band!" I cannot help but exclaim, catching her eyes and earning a tender smile of acknowledgement.

She knows I love live music and it warms my heart to see her express a little tenderness.

"Spence, Ash, over here!" I hear a familiar voice call out.

We turn to see our other five better halves hanging around near the keg, Kyla waving madly at us to join them.

"Hey guys," Spencer says warmly as we take turns hugging and saying our hellos.

"Did you guys kiss and make up?" Glen asks and I consider smacking him.

"Shut it, Glen," I threaten and he holds his hands up in protest.

"Whatever, dude. I was just gonna warn you…see that guy over there?" He points towards the crowd and we all stare at him, waiting for him to make his point. "Yeah, he was the King High locker bandit, so be careful. All I'm saying."

"You're an ass," I spit out before turning to make my exit.

"Ashley, no, wait." Spencer grabs hold of my arm firmly before turning me back towards her. "Glen, enough of that tonight, okay?"

"Alright, alright. Sorry, Ash." He shoots me a goofy grin and I cannot help but smirk and shake my head. "Truce."

He sticks his hand out to shake mine.

"Aw…no…you two are the ones that need to kiss and make up," Chelsey interjects.

"GOD, NO!" I assure her as I dry heave a little at the thought.

"How about some cool refreshments," Aiden suggests as the tension in the air begins to dissipate.

"Right behind you, buddy."

The two boys head off to fill their hands with cups of beer as the girls are left behind to make fun of most of the people at the party.

The mood is finally light and we are all laughing and having a good time. The music is amazing and I silently remind myself to find out the name of the band before we leave. The sound is a little 311 meets Deathcab, if that makes any sense.

Anyway, I think my voice would sound pretty good leading some of these songs, if I do say so myself.

Spencer is really letting her guard down with me and has even leaned into me a few times, allowing me to put my arm around her as we continue to joke and laugh with our friends.

At one point, I even catch her looking at me lovingly, almost longingly.

_Yeah. _

_I think we might make up tonight. _

The band finishes a funky little groove that I really liked when I hear the lead singer begin to speak into the microphone.

"So, King High grads…how many of you are going off to that horrific idea they call college?" he shouts as hoots and hollers fill the night air. "Oh yeah? Well good luck!" The sarcasm is clear, and I nod in agreement.

_I get it dude. Some of us were just not cut out…_

"Well anyway, let's slow this down for a while. This is a song about summer coming to and end, folks. So grab the hand of the one you love, pull them out onto the dance floor…well, the sand in front of the stage at least…and hold on like you're never going to let go."

The guitar comes in and the opening melody is truly beautiful.

I turn and cast shy eyes on the blonde beauty standing before me. She holds her hand out to me and I do just what the singer instructed.

And in a few seconds, we are surrounded in a sea of drunken teenagers, twirling in the arms of their current squeezes, as I take her firmly in my arms and pull her too me.

Glancing quickly around, I cannot help but think that we are different than each and every couple dancing on the sand around us.

Maybe I am being overly judgmental, but Spencer and I, we have something that I am sure most people cannot possibly find at our age.

And feeling her relax deeper into my arms, I close my eyes and feel the confirmation of my thoughts throughout my whole body.

And as the singer begins to sing, I feel her pull back just a little to stare deeply into my eyes.

_We watch the season pull up its own stakes,  
And catch the last weekend of the last week…  
Before the gold and the glimmer have been replaced,  
Another sun soaked season fades away…_

You have stolen my heart…  
You have stolen my heart…

I nod my head at those words, hoping she knows she really, really has…

_Invitation only, grand farewells,  
Crash the best one, of the best ones…  
Clear liquor and cloudy eyed, too early to say goodnight…_

You have stolen my heart…  
You have stolen my heart…

I lean in and capture her lips in a slow, sweet kiss…the first real one we have shared since all those days ago, and in this moment, it has felt like a lifetime to me.

_And from the ballroom floor we are in celebration,  
One good stretch before our hibernation,  
Our dreams assured and we all, will sleep well…we sleep well…_

Sleep well…

_Sleep well…_

_Sleep well…_

And I actually think, as she kisses me again, this time more deeply and with a greater sense of urgency, we just may sleep well tonight…

_You have stolen…  
You have stolen…  
You have stolen my heart!_

I watch you spin around in your highest heels (I spin her around the sand…yeah, a little cheesy but the smile on her face when I pull her back to me signals is so worth it…)  
_You are the best one, of the best ones..  
We all look like we feel!_

You have stolen my…  
You have stolen my…  
You have stolen my heart …

"You have, you know…" I nod again and smile tenderly at her.

And she nods in complete agreement.


	10. First

Chapter 10: First

Spencer's POV

I am SO nervous.

Why, you ask?

Because my first day at UCLA is tomorrow.

That's why.

And it does not help that Ashley has been gone all day.

ALL DAY LONG!

She had a meeting with Ethan and Madison, apparently to work through some songs she's been writing for Madison's album.

I know this is not exactly how Ashley foresaw her career beginning, but I have reminded her time and time again that any way to get her music out there is a good thing.

And she reluctantly left the loft this morning, the look on her face signaling to me that she almost feels like she is whoring herself out.

She's not!

And I'll keep assuring her of this for as long as it takes for her to realize that its baby steps.

And someday, she will be a world famous rock star, singing her own music for the masses.

And UGHH….that makes me excited and kind of sick, all at the same time.

So anyway, here I sit, chewing on my finger nails, obsessing over the right 'first day of college outfit', packing and re-packing my backpack with my books, staring at my schedule for day one, making sure I have the right books packed, and then re-packing my backpack again.

_Ashley, please come home! _

I need her to calm my fears and assure me that THIS is a 'good thing.'

I need her here to assure me that everything is going to be okay, and that I have nothing to be scared of.

Because as much as Ashley can piss me off, and as much as Ashley is filled with certain insecurities…well…

At the times of my life when I have been the most nervous…the most terrified for a new experience to begin…it has been Ashley who has been the one to calm my fears and make me feel like I am the safest and most secure I could ever imagine being.

FLASHBACK

I feel her grasp my hand firmly in her own as we walk into her bedroom.

Backing up towards the edge of the back of her couch, she leans against it, her hand still in mind.

I stumble a little before stopping in front of her. I feel myself all of the sudden tense up, as her hands glide up my body to grasp the sides of my face.

_I came here willingly, knowing full well what I came here for. _

When she looked at me from across the couch at my parents' house, asking me to come to her house tonight, I had no doubt why I was coming here.

But all the sudden, I feel a nervousness I did not anticipate. Like butterflies are doing more than fluttering in my stomach…

No, they are engaged in World War III, and the troops are large.

I have never kissed Ashley before…not like I know I am about to.

And although I have daydreamed about this moment just about every day since I bumped into her by her locker on my first day at King High, spilling her coffee, and garnering a snotty 'Ashley response', which sufficed to say, did not deter me…

I am about to actually kiss Ashley.

With tongue, and passion, and feelings…

And I've never kissed a girl.

I have barely kissed boys.

I mean, there were a few back in Ohio.

One I even gave my virginity to.

That one, horrifically uncomfortable night, which I would take back in a heartbeat…

In a heartbeat if it meant what was about to happen would really be my first time.

With her.

Ashley Davies.

And speaking of heartbeats, did I mention mine is so strong right now I think my heart might burst right out of my chest?

Especially as I feel Ashley's warm breath on my face.

_Oh God. _

_Here it goes. _

And just like that, soft lips are upon mine.

The softest lips I could ever imagine feeling against my own.

And to my delight, they taste sweet.

Not like I have ever tasted before.

Her lips begin moving against mine, and before I know it, mine are moving right back against hers.

And almost immediately, I feel a warmth rush through me that I have never experienced before.

Ever.

Her hands are now cupping my face gently and my arms instinctively wrap around her body, pulling her closer to me.

Just when I think I am getting the hang of this, she pulls back and smiles tenderly at me. One hand descends down to take my own in it, and the next thing I know I am being led to her bed.

My heartbeat picks up a bit as we sink down, sitting on the edge, before turning to face one another.

I smile shyly and note her smile is filled with the same amount of shyness.

It shocks me a bit, seeing how I think Ashley should have a great amount of confidence in this moment.

She's done this before.

This is nothing new to her.

I glace into her beautiful brown eyes, and for a moment, I second guess those thoughts.

_Has she done this before? _

Cause if you ask me, she looks like she is just as nervous as I am.

She leans in towards me and captures my lips in another long, slow kiss. I feel her slowly pull me down onto the bed before she rolls over on top of me.

She then slowly helps me scoot up the length of the bed before gently placing my head onto a soft pillow.

Her movements are so slow and deliberate, and oh, so tender, that I begin to feel the 'butterfly war' in my stomach subside.

As her body rests down onto me fully, I feel my eyes instinctively shut. Her body feels so warm against mine, and the heat purses down into a place that I am sure I have never felt it before.

"Spencer," I hear her whisper and I slowly open my eyes so that I can look at her.

"Hey," she whispers again, very shyly, and I feel my heart flutter as I stare deeply into her eyes.

She kisses my forehead gently, and I battle with the flutter as to not let the war take over again.

Her arms are propped on either side of my head, and I cannot help but glance a little.

_Oh my GOD. _

_She is so sexy. _

I can see her bra peeking out over the top of her tank top, and though her chest is tight and muscular, I am almost in shock at how turned on I am at the sight of the tops of her soft breasts.

I mean, in theory, I have thought I was attracted to women before, and I certainly knew Ashley Davies had filled up every inch of my head and heart for so long now...

But until now, until this moment of feeling her body against mine, of seeing bits and pieces of the body underneath the clothes, I never really, truly knew what all of that meant.

"Spencer, you are not going to do anything you are not comfortable with, okay?"

She nods gently, and with such a simple statement, I feel all doubt melt completely from my body and mind.

And just like that, I feel completely relaxed underneath her.

I am not scared anymore.

I trust her completely.

And I need her to know this, because while I feel more relaxed, the nervousness has quickly been replaced with a completely new sensation

And that is simply pure and raw need.

Need for her to touch me.

In ways I am sure I have never been touched before.

I feel what I can only describe as liquid heat form between my legs, and the sensation catches me completely off guard.

I am quite sure I have never felt that before.

And although I am sure that is what is supposed to happen when you are intimate with someone, it's sure as hell never happened to me with anyone else.

"I know Ash," I assure her, remembering the words that have completely converted me into a whole new world.

"Spence, just trust me, please…"

I stare deeply into her eyes, and am nothing short of shocked as I recognize the sense of desperation I see.

_My God, I DO trust her. _

_How can she not feel that right now?_

And in her apparent nervousness, I find even more confidence.

"Ash, I trust you with my life," I promise her, hoping she can recognize the honesty behind my words and with the look in my eyes.

I stare intently into her eyes as she leans down into me.

After what feels like a lifetime, her lips are on mine again, and I cannot help but moan at how good it feels to have her warm body completely flush with mine, her lips gently moving against my own.

I feel her tongue begin to trace between my lips and I need no further encouragement as I part my lips and allow her tongue to slide inside my mouth.

_Oh God. _

_It feels so good. _

Our mouths feel like they were meant for one another.

The warmth and wetness I feel between my legs is intensifying as she begins to move her soft fingertips against my sides, underneath my shirt. Her touches leave tingles behind and I can feel goosebumps rise so intensely it is almost painful.

I thrust my tongue into her mouth and allow myself to explore the inside of her mouth, our tongues circling one another.

I hear her moan and it causes me to thrust my body up and into hers. I feel my tank top begin to slide up my body and I feel a moan escape my own throat as I feel her soft stomach rub against my own.

I cannot believe the heat I feel surging through my entire body as I feel her rock slowly against me. I feel the wetness against my panties and its almost uncomfortable.

I am aching at this point. I need them off and I need to feel her touch me.

I cannot believe how much I need her to touch me.

"Spencer…"

She practically moans my name and I feel myself become impossibly hotter.

"What, Ash?" I am so overcome with desire that I feel almost desperate to feel more of her.

I feel her soft fingertips graze my abdomen before she grips the bottom of my tank top lightly.

_Oh, Please. Take it off._

"I am going to take this off, okay?"

She says this so shyly and sweetly that I almost giggle.

I stifle the urge, however, as I want nothing to detract from what is happening.

She removes my tank top slowly and I shiver as I feel her gaze over my almost bare chest.

I grab her wrists and cannot believe she is shaking. I want nothing more than to steady her trembling hands and allow them to touch me in ways I can only imagine she is capable of.

"Ashley, you don't have to ask for permission," I assure her before releasing her wrists. I pull her own tank top over her head and pull her back to me. "You don't have to ask for permission for anything. I trust you, Ashley. With everything."

As her body melds against mine again, I feel a throbbing between my legs, so unfamiliar and yet so powerful, I wonder how I have gone this long without having anyone invoke such a reaction in me.

"Spencer…I…I…"

_Don't tell me you love me, Ashley._

Although I am pretty sure I do love her, and I have for a while now, I don't need to hear it.

Not just yet.

I don't need her to tell me this to make what we are doing okay.

Because lying here, underneath her, feeling emotions and physical reactions I never knew were possible…

That is all I really need.

"Shhh…Ash, don't ruin this with things that don't need to be said…yet…" I look at her seriously and try to convey how much I want her and how she is enough right now.

I nod my head slowly and smile, not able to contain my longing anymore. "Please, Ash…"

_I need you._

_I want you. _

_I have never wanted anything like I want you right now. _

I don't even understand what it is I want, but I know I want everything that is Ashley Davies.

I feel her hands wrap around my back and fumble with the clasp of my bra.

I nearly yank it off of my own body, but contain myself as I want to feel her undress me.

Every inch of me.

She finally rids me of the garment, and I can only look up at her in my continued attempts to convey to her how much she is turning me on and how much I want this. I think I blush a little as I watch her eyes travel down my neck and rest on my exposed breasts.

No one has ever looked at my body like she is looking at it, and feel like I am losing control of this body as I roll my hips up into hers in an effort to gain more contact.

I moan at the feeling and hear her return the sentiment.

I want her so bad I don't know what to do about it.

Just then, I feel her fingers trace my ribcage as they move towards my breast. I feel my nipples already straining and she has yet to touch them.

But the anticipation is invoking a reaction in me that I cannot control.

_Please touch me. _

Her fingers have finally made their way to one of my breasts and I gasp as she cups it fully. I slam my eyes shut and shudder beneath her touch.

_How is she doing this?_

_How is she causing this reaction?_

_Does she really want me the way I do her?_

_God, get it together!_

Her fingertips finally graze one of my hard nipples and I cannot help but moan in ecstasy as she begins working the nipple between her index finger and thumb.

I pull my head up just enough to meet her eyes again, attempting to convey to her that although this is amazing, I need more.

_I am ready for more._

I am ready for her to touch me in the place that is throbbing and filled with so much heat and wetness…it almost scares me because it is so foreign and unexpected.

She props herself up and rests to the left of my body, letting her fingers trace slowly over my nipple. Twisting it a few more times, I feel her lower her body down upon me again before she kisses me deeply for a while, her tongue moving firmly against mine, setting off a whole new series of whimpers and moans. She then traces her tongue down my jaw line, to my neck.

I am in absolute ecstasy and I no longer have any control of my hips as she continues to work down my neck before peppering my collar bone with wet, open-mouthed kisses.

When I feel her mouth hovering over the top of my breast, my resolve is gone completely.

"Ashley, I'm ready," I assure her as I watch her eyes avert down to my stomach.

I am shaking a bit at this point, but only in anticipation of her touches, and not because of fear or doubt.

_God, I hope she can sense this because I am truly about to explode with want for her. _

She lowers her mouth fully over my breast, and I feel her warm tongue circle my nipple.

I am sure the groan that escapes me is the loudest to date and Imy hips begin to roll up and down as she sucks ands licks my breast and nipple while using her hand to bring the other to the same hardened state.

As my hips begin to move more intensely, I feel her hand creep down and begin to fumble with the button on my jeans, and then lower the zipper.

I feel my body react to every movement, every touch, every kiss, every suck, as she finally rids me my jeans and then my panties. I feel like the world is in slow motion as she lowers my lacy pink panties down my legs until she finally pulls them from my body.

I feel her pull her lips from my breasts, and I whimper at the loss of contact, before realizing I am lying fully naked, partially beneath her but almost fully exposed to her eyes.

In a move that I imagine is promoted partially by her own want and partially by her desire to make me feel more comfortable, she quickly rids herself of her own jeans and bra, leaving only a sexy black thong in place.

Losing the last of any control I once had, I pull her body on top of mine and roll my hips into her own, feeling my breathing become more shallow and desperate as I continue pulling her body into my own.

"Ash, I am ready. I cannot tell you this with any more clarity. I am ready for you."

_I need her to believe this. _

_To know this. _

_To feel this. _

I need her to help me to release this burning ache and desire that I am still trying to comprehend, but that has completely overtaken my body.

I watch as her eyes trace down my face, to my neck, over my breasts and hardened nipples, down my trembling stomach, to my slowly gyrating hips, to the place of mine that I know is about to be touched in a way I have never had, but always dreamed of.

She slowly traces her fingertips down my stomach until she lands just above the place I want her to be, and where I really think she wants to be. I look at her, deeply and tenderly, before she dips lower.

And the cries that escape my lips when she finally reaches that place let me know that after all this time, of staring longingly at her across the halls at school, of lying next to her in my bed watching movies, ignoring the heat radiating from her onto my own body, of watching her lips when she talks, losing all comprehension of the words coming from them, of being in love with her since I knocked her coffee cup out of her hands and apologized for bothering her…

I no longer have any doubt in my mind.

Ashley and I are meant to be.

And when her fingers finally reach the place that has been bringing me such an ache this entire time, I feel a flood come from me that I cannot control, nor do I want to.

And when she finally enters me, and moves so deeply within me, I feel an explosion that momentarily causes me to feel like I have left my body, reaching heights of ecstasy I truly never knew were possible.

And in that moment, I know I have finally felt what this should feel like.

What it never felt like before.

And what I can only hope it will feel like…for the rest of my life.

…

"Spence…"

My eyes flutter open, and I find her sitting on the couch, staring down at me, her eyes filled with interest.

My body is flushed and I feel sweat on my forehead and under my arms.

"Hey…you're home," I whisper as I shake my head and try to rid myself of the memory that has flooded my mind so many times since that night.

"You okay?" She asks seriously as she runs her hand over my damp forehead a few times. "You having a bad dream?"

I laugh out loud as I sit up and shake my head.

"No baby, not a bad dream at all," I assure her as I pull her face to mine. "I was just remembering…"

My voice drifts off as I kiss her lips softly.

She pulls back and looks at me with confusion.

"Remembering what?"

I smile tenderly and shudder as she caresses my face softly.

"The first time…" I whisper as I tilt my head to one side in hopes that she remembers it too.

"Our first time?" She inquires as she pulls me even closer to her.

"Yeah…our first time," I confirm as our lips meet again.

She pulls me from the couch and leads me to the bedroom.

She backs up against the bed and pulls me to her, her hands coming up to cup my face, just in the way she did that night.

I feel myself relax into her as she kisses me softly again.

And then we sink down into the bed.

And I forget that tomorrow I start college.

At least until the alarm sounds in the early hours of morning.


	11. Androgyny

Chapter 11: Androgyny

Ashley's POV

_Beep!_

_Beep!_

_BEEEEP!_

"Ughh….shut it off!"

I feel her body shift a little as she reaches up and hits the alarm clock with her free hand.

Rolling over, she presses her naked body to mine and I pull her into my chest. I give her forehead a few wet kisses before slinking a hand down and resting on the small of her back.

"What time is it?" I ask through a dramatic yawn as I watch her eyelids flutter a few times before opening fully, revealing her big, beautiful blue eyes to me.

"6:30," she declares before burying her face in my neck.

"I am NOT going to like this," I proclaim, pulling her more tightly and desperately to my body.

She begins to pull away from me, and I moan in protest as she sits up, dangling her legs off the side of the bed, revealing her flawless back to me.

"Speeenceee…" I whine, clawing weakly at her back in an attempt to latch on and pull her back to me.

She giggles softly and turns to meet my pout.

"Baby, I have to get up. I have class at 8:05 and I am still not sure where the building is." She tilts her head lovingly as my lower lip juts out more profoundly. My face is half buried in the pillow and I open one eye to her, pointlessly clawing at the air between us in another effort to coax her back to bed.

"Just a few more minutes," I beg, allowing my one eye to display my need for some more morning cuddling.

She leans back on her side, resting down to give me a soft kiss on the corner of my still pouting lips. "Drive me to school today?" She gives me a hopeful look, and I know I cannot deny her, even though I would like nothing more than to stay right where I am, warm and snuggly in our bed.

"Get in the shower…I'll make us some coffee," I offer, trying to push my selfish thoughts to the far outer reaches of my selfish mind.

"I can skip the coffee…come shower with me," she responds huskily.

_And…I'm up…_

…

"God, I need some coffee…"

I laugh out loud as I pull my Porsche onto the freeway, giving her a knowing sideways glance.

"I offered…" I remind her, eliciting a groan of acknowledgement. "Do you want me to stop at a Starbucks?" I offer sweetly, taking her hand in mine and kissing her knuckles.

"No, babe, we don't have time," she informs me as I press on the gas. "Uh…Ash…"

"We have time," I assure her as I begin to weave in and out of traffic, laughing inwardly as I feel her grip tighten on my hand.

"No…really….it's okay," she assures me. "I'm awake."

…

"I'm gonna miss you…" I whisper, cupping her face in mine and kissing her softly.

"Aw, baby, I'm gonna miss you too, but I will be done before you know it." She smiles lovingly at me before kissing me again. "Can you pick me up at 3:30 at the Broad Art Center? I think it's just right over there…" She points in the general direction of a large building before turning back to me, nervousness overtaking her face.

"Of course I will. I'll figure out where it is," I promise her. "Hey…" I take both of her hands firmly into my own. "You're going to be great…better than great, okay?" I nod my head at her a few times, giving her a nose-crinkling smile for good measure.

I watch her take a long, unsteady breath before gathering her backpack and purse. She opens the passenger door slowly and starts to climb out before being yanked back into the seat.

She turns to me, and I can sense she is shaking a little.

"Babe, even thought UCLA is not ready for you, you are more than ready for UCLA." I smile again, pulling her to my face by the back of her neck. "I love you."

I feel her body relax a little as she rests her forehead against mine and nods. She gives me one more goodbye kiss, and I hold it as long as she will let me. "I love you, too. See you this afternoon."

"3:30 sharp."

I let her go, a bit reluctantly, and watch as she descends onto the court yard. She turns back towards me and flashes a gorgeous smile before practically disappearing into the mass of students.

_There goes my baby…_

_Ughhh…why do I feel so wretched?_

I watch her for a few moments and realize why I feel so wretched.

Yep…in the five minutes it took her to reach the building where her first class is to be, I see about five heads whip around…three boys, and two girls.

_Why does she have to be so damn hot?_

…

It's 3:25 and I am pulling up in front of the arts school. I had done a little MapQuest to figure out where exactly to pick her up..

On my Blackberry in the middle of Madison and Ethan droning on and on about how 'Break the Silence' was a 'good concept' but not 'poppy' enough for Madison's album.

_Whatever_.

I put my car into park and wait impatiently for Spencer to emerge from the building.

_Ahhh…there she is…_

_And who dat bitch?_

Spencer is walking towards my car, but her eyes are not searching me out the way I just was her.

No, they are fixed on the tall, decently cute girl she is walking with, and they are laughing, somewhat enthusiastically as they move closer to me.

I climb out of my car and lean against the side, watching intently as Spencer finally pulls her gaze from this stranger and meets my eyes. I force a smile before averting my eyes to the girl who is, oh, I'd say five inches taller than Spencer, nowhere near as beautiful, but not unattractive by any stretch.

"Babe, hey!" Spencer calls out to me as they stop a few feet from my car.

"Hey you," I respond as I bridge the distance and pull her, a little possessively to me, kissing her roughly before pulling back and casting a dull expression on Sarah, Plain and Tall.

Ok, she's not really plain, but she is tall.

Like WNBA tall.

_WTF?_

_Who is this chick?_

"Babe, this is Jordan. We have Intro to Photography together!"

EXCLAMATION POINT!

"Hey," I respond with a lack of enthusiasm that I assume is lost on no one, including pretty much anyone who is within a mile radius of where we are standing.

"Hi, Ashley. It's nice to meet you!"

EXCLAMATION POINT!

This cordial greeting is met with a half-nod before I turn to Spencer, taking her hand to pull her towards the car.

"Spencer has told me so much about you," she continues and I roll my eyes before turning back towards her.

"Really? You guys paid a lot of attention in class then, eh?"

"Ashley, Jesus. It's the first day of class. They hand out syllabuses and go through it. What's there to pay attention to?" Spencer informs me, almost haughtily as she forces me to stop my movement towards the car.

Okay, she wasn't really being 'haughty' per se, but give me a break. She just met this girl and this girl thinks she, like, 'knows' so much about me?

"Yeah," SPAT agrees, as she and Spencer share a little chuckle. "You could pretty much skip the first day altogether, save getting the syllabus. Total snooze of a day, huh Spencer?"

Oh, by the way…SPAT is my new nickname for Jordan. Short for Sarah, Plant and Tall. And I kind of like it. Just thought of it on a whim, and I am quite sure it's gonna stick.

And before I get too lost in my nick-naming fog, I am pulled out violently as I hear them both laughing and going on about some professor who apparently has a weird stutter and an even weirder taste in bow-ties.

"Alright, well we need to be going, Spencer," I interrupt as I yank on her hand again, this time with a little more fervor.

"Okay, okay, Jeez. So Jordan, I will see you on Wednesday. Save me a seat," Spencer coos as Jordan flashes her a huge smile.

"For sure! (EXCLAMATION POINT!) Nice to meet you Ashley. See ya later, Spence."

_Oh. _

_No. _

_She. _

_DIDN'T._

…

"So, it was hilarious because when she introduced herself, we realized we both had androgynous names…"

"Um," I interrupt snottily. "I don't really think that because both your names can be boys or girls names, that makes them androgynous." I yank my hand from hers and pretend to find the value in the 10 and 2 position for the first time since I learned to drive all those years ago.

"Uh…isn't that the definition of androgynous? Mixing masculine and feminine?"

"Oh, so you go off to college for a day and all the sudden you're, like, what, the authority figure on vocabulary?"

I don't even know what I am saying at this point, and I am pretty sure my attempt to sound all smart…well, just made me sound kinda stupid.

"Ashley, what's your problem?"

She's a little angry at this point, and frankly so am I.

"Nothing, SPENCE…" I retort, doing that whole 'stress the name thing' for emphasis of which I am not sure the goal. "If you and SPAT want to me all androgynous in your cool college photography class, that's cool. Maybe I'll change my name to Dick so I can be part of the cool club."

_Yep, that sentence just came out of my mouth. _

"First of all, who the FUCK is SPAT?" she…well, spats.

I open my mouth to explain the nickname, but before I have a chance, she breaks my groove.

"Seriously, Ashley, is this the way its gonna be? Cause if so, I do think Dick is a pretty fitting name for you."

I whip my head around and find two fiery blue eyes glaring at me from across the console.

I feel my own face grow hot with anger.

"Perfect. Dick it is. We'll be like the three androgynous stooges, or the three androgynous amigos. Cooool…"

_I really am a dick._

I pull the car into our parking spot at the loft and barely have the key out of the ignition before I hear the passenger door slam loudly.

I exit the car hastily and chase after her.

Yep, Ms. Cool has all the sudden realized the error of her ways.

"Spencer…hey, wait a second." I leap into the elevator and practically lose an arm before landing safely inside. "Spence…"

"You don't want me to make friends? Is that is, Ashley? You want me to roam the campus alone and miserable?"

She's crying, and I no longer feel like Dick.

No.

I feel like a complete dickhead.

"No, baby, that's not it…at all." I move so I am standing right in front of her as the elevator makes it way the ten stories up to our floor. "I'm sorry, Spencer. I don't know what came over me."

I watch her body convulse through her tears and begin to feel truly wretched.

"Spence…baby look at me."

She lifts her huge blue pools to me, and by pools I mean normally mean amazingly big blue eyes…

But currently I mean amazingly big blue eyes filled with tears.

"I'm sorry. I am jealous."

This is the honest to God truth, and I am sure my expression can only prove this emotion.

"You're jealous?"

I nod.

"You're JEALOUS?"

I nod again, this time more timidly as I note my explanation is not doing me any favors.

"YOU'RE JEALOUS?"

AND…EXCLAMATION POINT! 

This is going to be a long, LONG, night.

I am such a dick!

EXCLAMATION POINT.


	12. Metaphors

Chapter 12: Metaphors

Spencer's POV

_I could forgive her. _

_I really could._

I mean, Ashley Davies is a bit of a 'hard-ass'…

But these past few days, I have heard, and observed, her gravel more than she ever has.

She made me breakfast in bed one morning.

She bought me flowers.

She told me I was the most beautiful girl in the world…

At least seventeen times.

She gave me a shoulder rub last night while I was doing my French I homework.

She tried to massage a lot lower before I reluctantly denied her in an attempt to make my point.

Yes, she graveled more than I thought was possible for Ashley.

And that includes high school, after she did her whole 'I'm straight and going to be with Aiden thing'.

Don't get me wrong…those months absolutely sucked.

And I was sure I would never be able to forgive her…or him for that matter.

This was actually a huge part of our reconciliation.

Me forgiving her 'best guy friend'.

Her 'brother' even.

_Whatever_.

I have two brothers…one that's still here on earth, tormenting my every move.

The other, in a better place, watching over me as I continue on my life's journeys.

And neither of them, which I have slept with.

_And now I just threw up in my mouth._

Anyway, I gave her ultimatums with Aiden.

I made threats involving her never being able to see or talk to him again.

I indicated on several occasions that if she 'respected' me and our relationship, she would cut him out of her life.

And she actually tried to comply with my demands. For several months actually.

Until her 'soul brother' cornered me at the park one afternoon, begging for my forgiveness, and despite my better judgment, convincing me that he was over her, was in love with Kyla, and wanted nothing more than for all of us to be friends again.

And now I find myself in an ironic situation.

Different, mind you me.

But perhaps a bit the same.

Ashley is jealous of Jordan.

I was jealous of Aiden.

Similar, maybe…

But identical, not even.

Now, let me illustrate the precise break-down of the comparison.

She slept with Aiden.

I met Jordan three days ago, have not slept with her, and never will.

First, cause Jordan is as straight as a one dollar bill.

I, on the other hand, am as queer as a two dollar bill.

Jordan: Straight as a baseball bat.

Spencer: Queerer than a football bat.

Okay, okay, enough of the confusing metaphors.

Jordan has a boyfriend.

Spencer has a girlfriend.

A very, very HOT girlfriend.

And honestly, even if that where not the case, Jordan's a cool girl. She's smart, and funny, and pretty cute.

But I feel nothing in her presence.

And in Ashley's, I feel something alright…

Something big. HUGE even.

Yeah, I love this rotten, immature, jealous girl who is currently sitting next to me on the couch, eyeing me with the most adorably regretful expression on her face.

Turning to face her fully, I tilt my head just ever so slightly to the left, in a message I know only she could possibly ever understand.

And the relaxation that overcomes her in reaction to the tinniest little of gestures signals me that we can have a little make-up time before my Thursday, 9:30 class begins.

And an hour later, as I am hugging and kissing her goodbye, I cannot help but think that I love this wonderful, beautiful, sexy, kind and amazing girl kissing my forehead and uttering the sweetest of words as I tear myself from her embrace and head towards campus.

I'm just as happy as a lark.

Sound as a pound.

Higher than a kite.

And still, queerer than a football bat.

And hopelessly in love with Ashley.


	13. Yes Translated

Chapter 13: Yes (Translated)

Ashley's POV

"Hmmm…you still have studying to do?" I pout as I clear away the Chinese take-out I picked up on my way home from the studio and pour her another glass of wine.

Wine always gets me around French homework, and after about a month of this new college schedule, I am not remiss to this fact.

She shakes her head as she looks at me over her adorable, and also sexy, reading glasses before setting her text book down.

"Yeeeesss…I still have studying to do," she confirms as I swallow a groan in protest.

_Be supportive. _

_Be patient. _

_Don't try to distract. _

_Don't ignore your inward instructions. _

_Or…cast aside all inward instructions and distract the hell out of your gorgeous girlfriend. _

_Yep, that last thought is probably going to win out…_

"Okay, well how about I help you study, baby?"

I am sure to ooze this offer in the most seductive voice I can muster.

Which does not say much…

Anytime I am faced with serious, studying, glasses-wearing Spencer, I get just a little hot.

And tend to attempt distraction.

_Let us see how this unfolds…_

"Ash…you don't speak a lick of French babe," she reminds me, and I immediately know this might be a bigger challenge than originally planned.

Sure…Spencer needs to take some pictures?

I am a willing subject.

She needs to discuss the latest hot topic of her 'Women's Studies' class?

A willing, and somewhat insightful debater, if I do say so myself.

But French?

Yeah, slept through, if not skipped, most of that class in high school.

But I shall not be deterred.

"Ah…but mon amour, je parle le français," I pull out of my ass.

This elicits a giggle, and I congratulate myself inwardly as I sit up straighter on the couch.

"Répéter, s'il vous plaît," I miraculously continue to pull from the depths of my retention of my high school French class.

"Répéter que?" She challenges me, setting her book on the coffee table and tucking her legs underneath her.

_And I'm out. _

_Damn. _

"Uh… répéter je vous aime?" I literally guess.

"Je t'aime," she 'repete-zes'.

"Au contraire, moo frère."

"Mon amie," she corrects again, and I laugh at myself.

Man, I remember more than I think I do, not perfectly, but I am a little proud of myself, nonetheless.

"Continuer." she challenges as she moves a few inches towards me.

"Um…okay…" I mumble as I search for something.

_Anything_.

"D'accord," she corrects.

And now I am getting a little impatient.

"This is stupid," I pout as I pull her by her legs so that she is straddling me on the couch.

"Ash…I have to study, baby," she insists as she shakes her head before giving me a soft kiss.

_Ah HAH! I think I remember this one. _

"Donnez-moi un baiser."

"I just did," she giggles as she gives me another kiss, this one a bit deeper, and with tongue.

_Hah!_

"Répéter," I suggest coyly as I move towards her face again.

Laughing more loudly, she pulls back, much to my disappointment.

"Baby, you are going to make me fail French," she scolds me as she moves off of my lap before picking her text book back up.

"SPEEEENCE," I whine as she settles back into the arm rest of the couch on the far opposite side of me. "What will you EVER need French for?" I inquire impatiently. "I mean, Spanish is the only useful foreign language in this country," I recite ignorantly, racking my brain for the follow-up as to why that heavily supported statement is true.

"Oh really? Okay…" She sets her book down again and faces me with challenging eyes. "Explicar su razón."

_Um…huh?_

"Estoy esperando."

And my eyes just glazed over.

"Spencer, my point is, this whole 'learn a foreign language thing' is great and all, but when are we ever going to use it?" I raise a challenging eye at her as I begin to slowly pull my tank top over my head.

I stop just as my lacy bra is fully exposed to her and tease her a bit as I lift my shirt up and down a few times over my chest.

"Ashley, it could come in very handy someday," she responds, shaking her head as she slides back across the length of the couch and rests her body against mine, yanking my tank from my body completely.

"Oh, yeah?"

My body is immediately hot and I force myself to stay focused for the remainder of her little explanation.

"When?"

"Well…" she draws out as she traces a fingertip over my tense stomach. "What if…"

She leans down and plants a firm kiss on my lips before retracting and focusing a serious stare on me.

"What if, what?" I urge her, all the while slipping both arms around her and pulling her more closely to me, before peppering her neck with wet kisses.

"What if you…uh…and me…God baby…" her hips are now rocking into mine and I have her shirt off her body in seconds.

"What if we what?"

I am kind of focused on what I want to be doing at this moment, but still a bit curious as to what her thoughts encompass.

"What if someday…"

Low, throaty groan.

"You and me…" 

Rocking of the hips into my heated center.

"Decide to go to Paris together."

Her lips are on mine and her tongue is plunging deep into my mouth, and as turned on as I am, I actually pull back.

"You and me in Paris?" I question, pushing her back just a bit so that I can look her in her eyes.

"Well, yeah…" she responds, almost shyly as she takes my face in her soft hands. "Like on our ten year anniversary or something," she whispers before ducking her head just a bit in the most adorable manner.

"Our ten year anniversary?" I exclaim, surprising myself with the sudden increase in the volume of my voice. Making a conscious effort to lower it, I continue. "You think about us being together for ten years?"

"Well, kind of," she offers shyly as she ducks her head again.

I bring one hand up to cup her chin, forcing her to look me in the eyes.

"What do you mean, 'kind of'?" I tilt my head a bit, although it could never be as adorable as the way she does it, but it still signals the sincerity of my question.

"Well…" she says softly before giving me a sweet smile. "I actually mean, like, on our tenth wedding anniversary."

I feel myself suck in a long, deep breath, before I instinctively tighten my grip on her.

"You think about that?" I ask, unable to mask my shock at her statement.

"Well sure…I mean, we could walk along the Champs Elysees, and look at the amazing art at the Louvre…"

I cut her off with a finger to her lips.

I feel my heart thudding against my chest and my thoughts are anywhere but Paris in this moment.

"No, I mean….you think of us being married?"

I feel her relax in my arms, and that is all the confirmation I need, though hearing it would not suck right now.

"Well…of course I do," she informs me, more confidently than I had expected, and I feel my heart slow and then seemingly melt inside my chest. "Why, don't' you?"

Her expression shifts to one of insecurity and my mind races for just the right words to convey how very much I think of that exact proposition…

_All the time, in fact…_

"Baby, of course I DO!" I exclaim before pulling her against me and crashing my lips against hers.

And just when I think I will die of wanting her, she pulls back and shifts so that she is standing in front of me. She takes my hand gently in her own before pulling me so that I am standing in front of her.

Unsatisfied with my response, I open my mouth and begin to speak again.

"I mean, I'd ask you right now if I thought…."

And then I feel her finger on my lips, shushing me in the way I did her a few moments ago. I smile as I kiss her finger gently, my eyes closing tightly as I relish in how it feels to be this in love with someone, and to reach a moment of clarity…

That moment of clarity being that I have just realized that someday, in some way, I am going to marry this amazing girl standing in front of me.

No questions asked.

"Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir?"

Ok…so I cannot translate this one word for word, but I am pretty sure I do not need a text book, or an internet French-to-English translator to tell me what the look in her eyes is conveying.

"Oui."

And I think I said "Oui", or 'Yes', or 'Si'…

Or 'Oh fucking hell, Yes, OUI, SI, YES!'

YES!

YES!

YES!

All night long…


	14. A Picture's Worth

Chapter 14: A Picture's Worth…

Spencer's POV

"Okay, now tilt your head to the right a little and look down," I instruct calmly as she pulls her knees to her chest and threads the fingers on one hand through the sand.

The sun is setting in the sky just over the ocean, causing the most amazing plethora of colors to bounce off of the waters.

She does as she is asked and I snap another picture of her as her eyes lift just slightly, her long dark eyelashes practically masking completely the deep brown irises underneath.

"You're beautiful," I announce simply, earning a soft smile. I snap the camera again just in time to capture the intimacy of the moment, and then lower my camera to my side.

She lifts her eyes completely to me and we lock our stares upon one another.

"So beautiful…" I repeat, taking a step towards her. She lifts a hand to me and pulls me down onto the sand next to her.

"Let me see that," she urges, grasping for my camera.

"Uh uh…" I protest lightly as I hold my camera behind my back. "I'm the photographer," I insist, this time earning an adorable pout.

She presses her lips against said pout, and I feel myself relax into her. Her tongue traces my lower lip before she slides it into my mouth, bringing her hands up to cup my face tenderly.

I feel myself get totally lost in her sweet, wet kisses, not realizing she is about to take advantage of the moment.

As my tongue meets hers, I moan softly and press my body firmly against hers.

Her arms slide down my back, and as our kiss deepens, I feel her grab my camera and pull it from my grasp.

"Ashley!" I cry out, and she giggles as she pulls herself up from the sand and backs away from me, positing the camera in front of her eye.

"What's your assignment again?" she inquires innocently as I lean back and prop myself up on my hands, crossing my legs loosely in front of my body.

"To take a beautiful picture," I remind her.

She smiles lovingly before snapping several shots of me.

"Then turn one of these in, and you're bound to get an A," she states, dropping the camera from her face before staring seriously at me. "An A+ actually."

"Ash…" I shake my head at her as she snaps several more pictures of me sitting in the sand, smiling at her with a look that can only be described as one of complete adoration. "I have to take the picture to get the grade, silly."

"Then take one of yourself. It's the only way to complete the assignment." She crinkles her nose at me and I melt so hard I think I might sink into the sand.

"Come here," I request softly and she sinks to her knees in front of me. I gently take the camera from her hands, and position it with my left hand as I pull her to me by her chin. "Kiss me," I whisper, tilting my head, cupping her gently where her cheeks meets her jaw line.

She smiles before threading one hand through the side of my hair, and then presses her lips softly against mine.

SNAP!

"There…" I pull back and set the camera into the sand. "Now that's beautiful," I nod, earning yet another heart-stopping nose crinkle. "But that one…that's just for you and me."

…

"SO…Jordan is coming over in a bit to study for our test Friday," I inform her nervously as she clears away the last of our dinner dishes. I observe her face fall momentarily before she re-groups, so to say, and forces a supportive smile.

"What time?" she asks calmly as she leans down to kiss my lips quickly before making her way into the kitchen.

"Seven or so. She's having dinner with her BOYFRIEND, and then she'll be over," I emphasize pointlessly, knowing full well Ashley does not give much deference to anyone having a boyfriend.

_You're only straight till your not. _

She's said those words to me many, many times.

She's had boyfriends.

I've had boyfriends.

Her preferences changed back in high school when she met a girl at a party.

Mine changed when I met her.

Well, not so much changed as became clear, but you get my point…

"Super," she calls back, and I hear her turn the sink on.

If Ashley is rinsing dinner dishes, I am pretty sure she's trying to distract herself.

"Babe, you're going to be nice, right?" I ask hopefully as I hear her begin to load the dishwasher.

"When am I not nice?" she retorts defensively and I literally have to bite my tongue and count to ten.

_Um, try the minute you met her. _

I'll keep that thought inside for now.

"Ash, just be cool, okay?"

I wait for her response as I fish into my back pack and pull my _Intro to Photography_ book out.

She doesn't respond at first, and I feel my nerves kick in. I glance at my watch and note its just a few minutes to seven. Swallowing hard, I glance over my shoulder to see Ashley standing in the doorway of the living room.

And she's wearing a pair of Aviator sunglasses.

And she has her arms crossed over her chest and is leaning casually to one side, tilting her head cockily.

_What on earth?_

I open my mouth to speak but she beats me to the punch.

"Baby, I am the epitome of cool, a'ight?" She presses her lips together and juts them out.

Again, 'cockily' is the only description I can come up with to describe her actions.

I stifle my laughter at the sight and attempt to level her with a disapproving glare.

"What?" She lifts her hands up, palms flat on both side of her head, and then lowers the Aviators down so they are resting on the bridge of her nose. She squints her eyes at me and then winks. "I can be a part of the cool club, baby."

"Ashley Davies, enough!" I lose my resilience as she begins to swagger across the living room, bobbing up and down with a profound limp.

"Listen, Cat…"

And I absolutely erupt as she takes a seat across the couch from me and sinks into it, throwing her arms back and spreading them over the back of the couch before cocking her head to the side, still peeking at me from over the top of her shades. "I'm just going to keep a low-pro, a'ight? Just gonna chill, maybe strum on the old six string, you know, keep it real chill, a'ight?" She sniffs and then pushes the sunglasses back up over her eyes before grabbing her crotch and then crossing her arms behind her head.

As completely obnoxious as she is being, I am halfway across the couch to attack her when the doorbell rings. I stop just as I am hovered over her, and she sniffs again before signaling that I should answer the door.

"Take the glasses off," I command before giving her a quick kiss though my laughter.

"Ah, no, Cat. These shades are a big part of my coolness," she informs me as I turn and attempt to glare at her, one hand on the door handle.

"Ashley…take them off." I raise one eyebrow at her and wait for her to comply.

She swipes them off of her face and tosses them to the side, not abandoning her little act for a second.

"A'ight, Spence, time to let SPAT in to play with the Cool Cats."

"If you call her SPAT to her face, so help me God…" I whisper through gritted teeth, recalling when I made her tell me the origin of that ridiculous nickname.

"Hey girl!" I greet Jordan innocently as I open the door to find my new friend waiting patiently on the other side.

"What's up, Spence?" she smiles as I step to the side and allow her into the loft.

I glance out of the corner of my side to see Ashley cringing at her shortening of my name, but ignore the look on her face as I close the door.

"Hey, Ashley," she says brightly as Ashley pulls herself from the couch and smiles fakely back.

"Jordan." She nods her head coolly and says nothing more.

_Chirp._

_Chirp._

_Chirp. _

"So how are you?" Jordan asks, attempting to break the awkward silence.

I could throttle Ashley right now. Five seconds into the study session and this is all she can muster up?

"I'm good. Real good." She responds before pulling me to her and kissing my temple. You?"

_Okay, that's progress at least. _

"Great!"

_Oh God, does Jordan have to sound so peppy?_

_It's SO not Ashley's thing. _

"Cool." I feel Ashley pull from me and begin to fumble around the couch for the Aviators and I slap her hand before pulling it into my own.

"Alright, well you gals get to it. I'll be in the music room working on some music if you need me," she informs me, throwing me a bit of a seductive look before nodding her head at Jordan again and making her exit.

Once the door to Ashley's music room latches shut, Jordan and I take a seat on the couch and she pulls her book from her own backpack.

"She hates me, doesn't she?" Jordan mutters, flipping her book open to Chapter Fourteen and then raising uncertain eyes to meet my own sheepish ones.

"Of course she doesn't, Jordan. Don't be silly." I try to sound convincing but her face fails to relax. "Ashley is just a little stressed out right now. She's supposed to be finishing Madison's album and she…"

"Spencer, don't worry about it, okay? I get it." She smiles brightly before pulling her book to her lap. "I can win her over," she announces, and I bite my tongue for the umpteenth time tonight. "You just wait. Ashley and I will be thick as thieves in no time at all." She shoots me a confident look before leaning back onto the back of the couch and pulling her legs up underneath herself.

And just then I hear the strum of a guitar, followed shortly thereafter by the sound of my 'sweet' girlfriend's voice.

"The language of love…  
Slips from my lover's tongue…  
Cooler than ice cream…  
And warmer than the sun…  
Dumb hearts get broken…  
Just like china cups…  
The language of love…  
Has left me broken on the rocks."

_Jesus, how the hell to I block her out?_

I search for the remote to the stereo but it's nowhere to be found.

"But there's just one thing-  
(Just one thing)…  
But there's just one thing-  
And I really wannna know…"

_SHIT. I know this song…_

"Who's that girl?  
Running around with you?  
Tell me…  
Who's that girl  
Running around with you?"

In my frantic efforts to find a source of sound to drown out Ashley's 'rehearsal', I glance up to find Jordan staring at me with an amused look on her face.

As if on clue, the volume of Ashley's voice increases exponentially.

"The language of love!  
Has left me stony grey!  
Tongue tied and twisted!  
At the price I've had to pay!  
Your careless notions!  
Have silenced these emotions!  
Look at all the foolishness!  
Your lover's talk has done…!"

"Thick as thieves, Spencer. In no time at all…" She smiles again and I shake my head.

"Okay, so do you have your notes from today?" I shout over the now somewhat violent strumming of the guitar in the background.

"But there's just one thing…  
(Just one thing)!  
But there's just one thing…  
And I really wannna know…

Who's that girl?  
Running around with you?  
Tell me!  
Who's that girl?  
Running around with you?

"Ahem, chapter 14, right? Aperture…"


	15. Knees, Part I

Chapter 15: Knees, Part I

Ashley's POV

"You cannot stay mad at me," I inform her as I curl my body behind hers and pull her into me.

Jordan left about an hour ago, and Spencer's been 'strangely' cold since we climbed into bed.

What'd I do?

Seriously?

What? I like Annie Lennox.

Even when she was with the Eurythmics, and sported that crazy orange buzz cut, and partnered with that weird looking dude with the mullet, who was about a foot shorter than her.

So sue me for wanting to pay homage to the Diva that is Annie Lennox. She has some amazing songs…

Sure, I could have played 'Why', but tooo whiney.

'Walking on Broken Glass?" Not an acoustic guitar song…needs a piano.

'Here Comes The Rain Again?' Come on, we live in L.A. It never rains in Southern California…they tell me.

NO, 'Who's That Girl' is a funky fun song that can be turned into a sweet acoustic diddy.

That's it.

I swear.

_COUGH._

"I'm not mad at you."

_Chirp._

_Chirp._

_Chirp._

_Someone needs to step on that cricket._

"Baby…"

"Okay, I'm mad," she finally confesses as she sits up and rests against the head board before crossing her arms in a very un-welcoming manner across her chest and glaring slightly at me.

"WHY?" I protest innocently as I attempt to uncross her arms and pull her to me. "Whyyy, eyyyyy eeeyyy?"

"Ashley, stop it. you know what you were doing and you know why I'm not happy with you right now." She stares seriously at me before yanking her arms from my grasp and rising from the bed. "You cannot go one time without causing a scene with Jordan, can you?"

She is now standing at foot of the bed with her hands on her hips, disapproval all over her face.

"What are you talking about?" I hop off the bed and move around so I am standing in front of her and place my hands softly on her shoulders, cringing as she steps back and shakes her head at me.

"Who's That Girl?" She thrusts her hands in the air and gives me a look mixed with confusion and frustration.

"What? I like Annie…"

"ASHLEY, STOP IT!"

Whoa.

She's a little pissy, I'd say.

"Spencer, babe, I was just messing around. I didn't mean to cause a problem here, okay?"

My voice is low and even, though I am filled with desperation as I come to the realization that my antics have truly ticked her off.

"Ashley, I just don't know what it is going to take to convince you that Jordan is not a threat." She is shaking her head in more disapproval and looks really upset at this point.

I am starting to feel bad.

I realize I am a jealous person, and that I sometimes let that get the best of me.

But I do trust her.

I just seem to have a natural distrust for everyone else in the world.

Especially people who spend larger amounts of time with my girlfriend than I sometimes get to.

It's probably a result of my childhood.

And my former inability to stay faithful to past girlfriends…and boyfriends.

And especially my stunt with Aiden.

And I probably need therapy.

But my POINT is, I really did not mean to upset her, and staring at her from across the bedroom, it is crystal clear to me that I have done just that.

"Spencer, I'm sorry. I acted like an idiot, again." I give her a sheepish smile and take a few timid steps towards her.

I watch her expression soften a little but her hands remain on her hips.

"You're not an idiot, but baby, I am going to be friends with Jordan. We have three classes together, and I like having her around when I am at school. That's it. How can I get you to accept that?"

"Well, for starters, you could let me do that thing I was talking about the other night…"

"Ashley Davies, I'm serious!" she groans and I stifle laughter, knowing my suggestion is a little misplaced in this moment.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry. Maybe I just need to spend more time with the two of you so that I can put all doubts to rest." I give her a hopeful look, attempting to convey the sincerity in my efforts.

"You'd do that? You'd try to get to know her better?" Her hands finally lower off her hips and she tilts her head in her special way.

"I'd do anything for you, baby," I assure her, and sigh inwardly as she moves swiftly into my arms. I even earn a soft kiss for my efforts, of which I have yet to embark on.

Baby steps…

"I'm just so in love with you, baby, and I guess I just have a hard time believing that not everyone in the world would fall in love with you, too, if they spent even a small amount of time getting to know who you are."

And if my prior comment earned me a kiss, I bet you can guess what that little nugget got me…

…

"Are we really going to a karaoke bar?"

We are standing in front of the mirror, applying the last of our make-up.

And I am earning a frustrated groan.

"Ashley, for the sixteenth time, yes. We are going to a karaoke bar." She shoots me a challenging look through the mirror and I choke back any more protests. "I know it's a real stretch for you to imagine singing in front of a crowd and all," she smirks, rendering me unable to retort, even if I was not in 'suck up to my girlfriend mode'.

"Alright, alright, but remember, you asked for it," I warn her.

…

In a pleasant turn of events, Jordan's fake ID is working like a charm and we are currently sitting at a table full of cold beers.

In an unpleasant turn of events, some guy is singing a rendition of 'Don't Stop Believing', and I can only compare the sound to a cat in heat in a back alley.

And that cat is being attacked by a pack of wolves.

And the wolves are being mauled by a bigger pack of lions.

ANYHOO, I am sitting here with Spencer, Jordan, and her boyfriend Nate.

He's kind of cool, actually, and they seem into each other.

Though the nagging voice in the back of my head is telling me she's also in to Spencer, but I am working hard on silencing that idiot.

"So Ashley, Jordan tells me you're a songwriter. That's pretty cool," Nate shouts over the Animal Planet disaster.

"She's a singer, actually. She's just writing songs for others to get her name out there," Spencer boasts and I shake my head at her.

"She exaggerates," I inform him as I take a sip of my beer. "But yeah, I guess you could say I am a bit of a musician." I shrug my shoulders casually and feel Spencer's hand squeeze my thigh. "So what about you, what do you do?"

"I'm still a student. I graduate this year, though, and then I am thinking about law school. Not sure though. School kind of sucks."

This earns a knowing laugh from the only other two students at the table, and I fight to control the jealously that stirs within me.

"Yeah, I wish I had an ounce of artistic talent. I swear I'd leave this college bullshit far behind," Jordan interjects, and I note it sounded sincere.

"What are you talking about, Jords? You're an amazing photographer."

You'd have thought that little warm fuzzy was from Nate, right?

Well, you'd be wrong.

Nope, that was my Spencer.

And it earned the sweetest of smiles from 'Jords'.

_Get a room, seriously. _

"Alright, next up we have Nate!"

The D.J.'s announcement bitch slaps me out of my thoughts, and I observe Jordan and Spencer's eyes light up.

"Bullshit, you're singing?" Jordan exclaims.

Nate kisses her quickly and then takes the stage, throwing her a confident look before taking the microphone form the stand.

"This one's for you, baby."

I start to flip through the song book as the intro to Nate's song blares over the cheering crowd. Just then, his speaking voice comes on deeply.

"Once upon a time  
Not so long ago…

Tommy used to work on the docks…"

_Typical_.

"Union's been on strike.  
He's down on his luck...it's tough, so tough…  
Gina works the diner all day.  
Working for her man, she brings home her pay  
For love - for love…"

_Seriously, this is why I hate karaoke bars. It's the same songs, every single_…

"She says: We've got to hold on to what we've got!  
It doesn't make a difference  
If we make it or not!  
We've got each other and that's a lot for love …

We'll give it a shot!"

And yes, the crowd ceremoniously joins in at this point.

"Ohh! We're half way there!  
Woah! Livin' on a prayer!  
Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear!  
Woah Livin' on a prayer!"

I glance over and see Jordan staring at her boyfriend, a look of pure adoration on her face. Spencer takes my hand and urges me to sing along.

I roll my eyes and turn my attention back to Nate.

"Natey's got his six string in hock…"

_Cute._

"Now he's holding in what he used  
To make it talk - so tough, it's tough…

Jordan dreams of running away…"

_Okay, okay, it really is kind of cute, actually._

"When she cries in the night,  
Natey whispers: Baby it's okay, someday!

We've got to hold on to what we've got  
'Cause it doesn't make a difference  
If we make it or not!  
We've got each other and that's a lot  
For love - we'll give it a shot!"

And now Jordan is up, on her feet, dancing and pumping her fists in the air in support of her prideless boyfriend.

And I cannot help but smile.

And before I know it, I am singing along to 'Livin on a Prayer'.

_I know…_

"Ohh! We're half way there!  
Woah! Livin' on a prayer!  
Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear!  
Woah! Livin' on a prayer!  
Livin' on a prayer!

LIVIN' ON A PRAYEEER!"

Spencer pulls me to my feet and into her arms, and I cannot help but squeeze her to me as I continue to sing along with Nate, who P.S. is not a bad singer.

"We've got to hold on ready or not!  
You live for the fight when that's all that you've got!

"OOOOHHH! We're half way there!  
WOOOAAH! Livin' on a prayer!  
Take my hand and we'll make it - I swear!  
Woah Livin' on a prayer!" 

And despite myself, I am laughing and cheering and singing along with the crowd as Nate points to his girlfriend and finishes his song before placing the mic into the stand and smiling proudly at us all.

_Not too shabby, mister. _

We re-take out seats and Nate bends down to kiss Jordan again before sliding into his own chair and wiping the sweat from his brow.

Jordan is beaming at him and Spencer high-fives him before he turns to who I suspect he thinks his harshest critic will be.

"Not to shabby," I assure him, holding my hand up to give him my own high-five.

"Well, I'm no rock star, but I do what I can," he grins before throwing his arm around Jordan and swallowing a large gulp of beer. "But I think it's your turn, Ashley."

"Yeah, baby, you should sing something," Spencer coos as she leans in to give me a little kiss.

"Maybe," I respond cryptically as I fold a white piece of paper I have just scribbled on and take a sip of my own beer.

"Anyone ready for another?" Jordan shouts over what I have determined to be a group of sorority girls who are MURDERING 'Girl's Just Wanna Have Fun.'

_Yuck_.

"Yes, PLEASE!"

…

About a short time later, I am not sure what beer we are all on. I am actually having fun, and despite myself, am starting to think Jordan might not be so bad.

"Ashley!"

_Oh shit. _

"Ashley, is there an Ashley out there? Ashley, you're up girl!"

I see Spencer's eyes widen in excitement, and I slam the rest of my beer.

Shot of courage.

_And oh, GOD, what was I thinking. _

I stumble to the stage and take the mic in my hand.

I glance over at our table and see three faces staring back at me in anticipation of what is to come next.

"Okay, so I never do this, but this song is going out to a certain beautiful blond sitting right over there…" I point to Spencer and note her grin grow into a full-on, tooth-filled smile. "Baby, this song is how I feel about you." 

I hear a collective "Awwww" ripple through the crowd, and clear my throat as the intro comes in.

And I watch Spencer's face go blank as the recognition of the tune I have selected registers…

"I love myself, I want you to love me,  
When I feel down, I want you above me…  
I search myself, I want you to find me,  
I forget myself I want you to remind me !"

I begin to strut around the stage, not breaking Spencer's dumbfounded stare as I break into the chorus.

"I don't want anybody else…  
When I think about you I touch myself!  
Ooh I don't want anybody else…Oh no, oh no, oh no…"

I step off the stage and walk to in her direction, licking my lips before breaking into the second verse.

"You're the one who makes me come running…  
You're the sun who makes me shine…  
When you're around I'm always laughing…  
I want to make you mine!"

Her hand is over her mouth, but I can see the amusement twinkling in her blue eyes.

I am right in front of her and the rest of the bar fades away, even despite the hoots and hollers I am earning from my production.

"I close my eyes, and see you before me…"  
Think I would die If you were to ignore me…  
A fool could see just how much I adore you…  
I get down on my knees I do anything for you!"

And yep, you guessed it.

I am on my knees, my eyes squeezed shut, the microphone tilted to the side as I begin to gyrate up and down.

"I don't want anybody else…  
When I think about you I touch myself…  
Ooh I don't want anybody else…  
Oh no, oh no, oh no!

I love myself, I want you to love me…  
When I feel down I want you above me…  
I search myself I want you to find me…  
I forget myself I want you to remind me!

I don't want anybody else!  
And when I think about you I touch myself!  
I don't want anybody else!  
Oh no, oh no, oh no…."

And I am on my feet, the crowd going nuts at this point. I trace my finger under Spencer's chin before turning back towards the stage. Hoping back on the stage, I place the mic in the holder and grasp it with both hands before turning a serious but seductive stare back on her.

"I want you,  
I don't want anybody else,  
and when I think about you I touch myself…  
OO OO OO-OO Ahhhhh!"

I don't want anybody else…  
When I think about you I touch myself!  
I don't want anybody else….  
When I think about you I touch myself!  
I touch myself!  
I touch myself!  
I touch myself!

I honestly do…

I touch myself!"

And I let my voice trail off before blowing her a kiss.

And the crowd goes wild.

And the look on her face, while in reflection over my song choice could be one of total mortification, is actually one that signals that we may be finishing our beers and heading out very, very soon.

And I think she might get down on HER knees and do anything for ME… 


	16. Loco

Chapter 16: Loco

Spencer's POV

"I like it," I inform her as she sets her guitar down and glances shyly at me.

"Really?" She bites her lip adorably and a faint blush creeps over her tanned cheeks.

Ahhh, my Ashley is back to her nicely browned self.

Don't get me wrong, we've spent some good bedroom time since her 'confession' at the karaoke bar, but in between 'that' and my classes, we've also spent some QT down at the beach working on our tans.

Not that it hasn't been a much more challenging task for me to preserve my summer skin tone.

Ashley seems to be a bit of a hypocrite when it comes to preventing skin cancer.

I'm expected to apply no less than a 30 SPF at all times.

Oh, and a 50 to my face.

But despite this protection…being my overly-protective girlfriend and her obsession with UV ray protection for me only, I've managed to stay a nice brown into the early fall season.

So back to present.

Ashley has just played me a song she is about to pitch to Madison and Ethan in the morning, and it was really good.

What am I saying?

Good does not even begin to do it justice.

It was amazing.

She's so unbelievably talented, and I wish she had a little more self-confidence about her song-writing abilities.

She's certainly not lacking confidence in any other arena, God love her.

"Ashley, it was amazing. Play it again, please?" I give her a reassuring head nod and a soft smile, curling my legs up underneath me and relaxing back into the couch, preparing myself to be swept away again by her sultry, beautiful voice.

She strums her strong fingers over the strings of her guitar and flashes me a blinding smile before starting back into the first verse.

"She searched for those wings that she knew  
That this angel should have at her back…  
And although she can't find them  
She really don't mind,  
Because she knows they'll grow back…  
And she reached for that halo that she knows  
That she had when she first caught her eye…  
Although her hand came back empty,  
She's really not worried  
'cause she knows it still shines…"

She closes her eyes tightly and her voice rasps in just the perfect manner as she breaks into the chorus.

"I can't promise that I'll grow those wings  
Or keep this tarnished halo shined…  
But I'll never betray your trust  
Angel mine…"

She opens her eyes and locks her brown eyes on me, and I feel myself grow lost in them.

"I search all the time on the ground  
For our shadows cast side by side…  
Just to remind me that I haven't gone crazy  
That you exist and are mine.  
And I know that your skin is as warm and as real  
As that smile in your eyes…  
But I have to keep touching and smelling  
And tasting for fear it's all lies…

I can't promise that I'll grow those wings  
Or keep this tarnished halo shined…  
But I'll never betray your trust  
Angel mine…"

I watch in awe as her fingers stroke the strings in a beautiful solo, her eyes closing tightly in concentration as her fingers glide gracefully over the neck of the guitar.

She's truly amazing.

And this song is not meant for someone like Madison.

Don't get me wrong…I do like Madison these days.

She's grown up, and she's actually become a good friend to us both.

In short, she's not a raging bitch like she was most of High School.

But this song, this song begs to be sung by Ashley…

"Last night I awoke from the deepest of sleeps  
With your voice in my head…  
And I could tell by your breathing,  
That you were still sleeping,  
I repeated those words that you had said…

I can't promise that I'll grow those wings  
Or keep this tarnished halo shined  
But I'll never betray your trust  
Angel mine…"

She smiles before setting her guitar down again.

And I am positive the smile on my face is not going anywhere anytime soon.

"Ashley…" I slide across the couch and wrap my arm around her back before placing a long, soft kiss on her lips. "It's absolutely beautiful. I don't know what else can be said."

"You think Madison will like it?" She asks nervously, way to unsure about just how perfect her song really is.

"You want my honest opinion?" I nuzzle into her neck before pulling back and staring hard into her timid eyes.

"Ummm…of course I do. I think…." She bites her lip again and I place another soft kiss in an effort to soothe the damage she is probably doing to those perfect pink specimens.

"It's not Madison. It's too beautiful and too heartfelt. It's you, Ashley, not her." I nod slowly and attempt to convey to her how serious I am about this opinion with my expression.

"But I have to have a song ready by tomorrow, Spence." She closes her eyes and leans back into the couch and runs her fingers through her messy brown curls. "I don't have anything but that song."

"I don't care. It's not the one to give her. You've given her way too many gems of yours. Tuck that one away for when it's your turn to shine." I pull her into my arms and begin stroking her face and back soothingly. "I mean, I cannot imagine that song with synthesizers and a poppy beat. She'll destroy what it should be." I kiss her lightly on the top of her head and feel her relax deeper into my arms.

"I know. And you know she'll have to change the 'she' to a 'he'. Ewww…."

We both giggle at the realization that Ashley cannot really truly write from the heart for Madison and for the pop music audience that will likely follow her.

No, I think Ashley's days as a muse for Madison's pop career are reaching their end.

"So think…what defines her life? What does MADISON care about?" I lean back and force her to look at me, dedicated to helping her workshop some new ideas so she can come to bed and I can show her what it is **I **care about.

"Boys."

"Ewww…"

"I know," she replies flatly.

"What else?" I grab a piece of paper and one of her dull pencils and start jotting down a list.

"Clothes."

"Better, but not sure how you can pen a great song about 7 jeans." I raise an amused eye at her and coax her to keep trying.

"Hey, ZZ Top sang about tight fitting jeans!" She protests, and I giggle and shake my head.

"Keep thinking."

"I don't know…she's freaking crazy, Spence!"

I burst out into laughter at this very true statement. "Yeah, she's loco alright."

And for reasons I have yet to understand, her eyes light up at this statement.

"Loco…hmmmm…you might be on to something, baby…"

And she's got that sparkle in her eyes that signals to me that she's got a brilliant idea.

…

"They LOVED it!" She cries as she comes bounding through the door the next evening.

I am curled up on the couch, parlez-ing some serious Francais in preparation for my test on Friday, but I set my book down and rise to greet her and congratulate her properly for what I assume was a successful day.

"I knew it," I respond simply before taking her face in both hands and kissing her firmly.

"Hey you," she whispers as she rubs her nose against mine.

"Hey," I smile back before pulling her lips to mine again. I begin to pull back, but she holds me still and pulls me closer into her body.

"Where do you think you going?" she coos as she grasps me by the back of my head and begins peppering my face with warm, wet kisses.

I feel my knees go weak, and almost as if she senses this happen, she wraps her arms firmly around my back and holds me up while she begins assaulting my neck.

"Uhhhh…baby…I just…mmmmm…."

_What was I saying? _

_Oh yes._

_Her song. _

"Ash, I just want to hear all about your meeting," I inform her as I take her by the hands and pull her down next to me on the couch.

She pouts a little but then her eyes grow wide with excitement.

"What can I say? They absolutely loved it!" She is grinning from ear to ear and my heart bursts with pride for her.

"I had no doubt," I reply confidently, giving her hands a quick squeeze.

"Yeah, they're going to re-work it just a bit. Make it first person instead of third, but other than that, Ethan thinks it's going to be the next big dance club hit. Can you believe it?"

Her excitement is contagious and I feel myself grow giddy as I clap my hands and throw my arms around her in a warm hug.

"My lips are devil red, and my skin's the color of mocha. I will wear you out. Livin la vida loca!"

"Whoo Hoo!" I jump from the couch and begin dancing in front of her, urging her to continue singing so she can get a preview of what her big hit is going to inspire.

And she's on her feet, pulling me into her, grinding her hips into mine as she continues to preview the re-vamped version for me.

"Upside, inside out I'm livin' la vida loca!  
I'll push and pull you down, livin' la vida loca!  
My lips are devil red and my skin's the color mocha!  
I will wear you out! Livin la vida loca, Come On!  
Livin la vida loca, Come on!  
I'm livin la vida loca!"

She spins me around the living room a few times before pushing me back towards our room.

"And just what do you think you're doing?" I tease as I stumble over my own two feet. She grabs my hips quickly and steadies me before crashing her lips into mine.

"I will wear you out!" She sings as she pulls my shirt off my body and tosses it to the side, before pulling me to her again and sucking roughly on my neck.

I laugh out loud before fumbling to rid her of her own shirt.

"You're crazy, baby," I inform her as I feel my pajama bottoms being lowered to the ground.

And in one swift move, she pulls me up so I am straddling her hips.

She carries me to the bed and throws me back onto it before shimmying out of her tight jeans.

And as her eyes grow to a shade darker than mocha…I'd say espresso is more like it…she climbs onto the bed and slides her body on top of mine.

I moan loudly as she presses herself into me, trailing her tongue from my collar bone and up my neck. She is breathing heavily, and after a few more strokes of her tongue on my neck, I feel her hot breath in my ear.

"Crazy about you, baby."

I flip her over and remove her panties quickly before sliding down the length of her body. I watch as she parts her legs and props up so she can watch every move I am about to make.

And as I run my tongue through her entire length, I moan loudly as I take in her familiar scent and her tantalizing taste dances through my mouth.

_And once you have a taste of her, you'll never be the same…_

A/N: The first song (since I tend to forget to give the shout outs) Is "Angel Mine" by The Cowboy Junkies. And Ricky Martin clearly owns "Livin La Vida Loca".

Also, not to sound needy, but I do appreciate the reviews. I think if YOU think that my stories are worth reading, a good review will help others to check them out. I know people are reading cause I get the alerts that people are tagging my stories. So take a second and tell me what you think…if you are reading and enjoying. Or even if you're reading and not enjoying…


	17. Hold On

Chapter 17: Hold On

Ashley's POV

I glance at the clock and note, for the third time this week alone, that it's after ten and Spencer is not home yet.

No, Spencer is not lying on the couch with me, talking about our respective days, kissing me, and forcing me to decide whether or not we are going to go into our bedroom to sleep, or to do other things…

NO…Spencer is working in the darkroom at school, trying to finish her semester project, which apparently is a portfolio of her photographs. As she has explained, her final for _Into to Photography_ is based on a compilation of her semester long work, and she is currently focused on developing the pictures that she is planning to submit.

And it has occupied most of the last couple of weeks of her life.

Translation: It has taken her away from me.

And homey don't play that.

I can't cook.

So that sucks.

And in turn, I have had take-out most nights since she's been working on this project.

Oh, and I hate cleaning.

So that REALLY sucks.

The loft is a pigsty.

And while I 'love myself', I'd rather her love me. Cause I don't want anybody else. And it's not nearly as fun to…

Touch myself.

So that sucks the most.

I send her a text, asking her if she has any clue when she'll be home tonight, before reluctantly changing into my jammies and getting ready for bed.

As I sink into our big, lonely bed, I hear my phone buzz from the nightstand.

_Baby, I am sorry. Maybe another hour? I love you. Don't wait up if you are tired. S. _

_Don't wait up?_

_DON'T WAIT UP?_

_ARGGGHHHH!_

She knows I am incapable of 'not waiting up'.

I cannot sleep until I know she is next to me.

_Pathetic? _

_Maybe. _

Although as I flip on the television, and relax back into my pillow, I feel my eyes grow heavy.

_Oh, hell yes! _

It's the _Friends_ episode where Carol and Susan get married.

Finally, an episode worth sitting up for!

And total bummer that Spence is not here to watch it with me.

I pull the covers up over my waist and grab my phone again, checking for an update from Spencer.

Nothing.

My eyes grow even heavier as I fluff my pillows a little to keep myself awake.

_NO, not like that. _

_Get your mind out of the gutter, people. _

Anyway, it's not like I have not been working my ass off lately, too.

Between waiting up into all hours of the night for her to get home, and working on finishing Madison's album, I am lacking a little shut eye these days.

And homey REALLY don't play that.

Maybe I'll just close my eyes for a few minutes…you know, just to give them a little rest.

…

Spencer's POV

I tip-toe into our bedroom and undress as quietly as I can.

I glance at the clock on our nightstand and note it is after one in the morning.

I feel my heart sink as my eyes adjust to the darkness and I see Ashley curled up against my pillow, her face pursed in concentration, as if she's having a very serious dream.

I pull on a pair of boxers and a tank top, and slide in next to her. Pulling my pillow from her arms, I replace it with my body. I feel her stir a bit as I place a soft kiss on her forehead.

I watch as her eyes flutter open and lock on mine. She looks confused and a little disillusioned as I pull her to me. I turn onto my back and pull her into my arms, gently rubbing her back as I inhale deeply into her hair.

"Don't wake up, baby," I softly urge her as I place a few more kisses onto her forehead.

"What time is it?" she groans, and I swallow hard before responding.

"It's after one, sweetheart. I'm sorry…"

She turns her head to glance at the clock and I see her frown slightly before turning back and nuzzling her face into my neck.

"Long night, huh?" She notes, through a dramatic yawn.

Though I actually don't think she's being dramatic. I think she's actually really tired.

"Yeah, but I am making progress. Just a few more weeks, babe, and we'll have like a month before I start classes again."

I lower my head so that I can look at her. Her head is still on my chest, but she is staring sweetly up at me.

She yawns again, more loudly this time, before lifting just enough to kiss me. I smile into her kiss and thread my fingers through her hair.

"I don't hold you enough," I inform her as I pull her into my chest and wrap my arms more firmly around her body.

"What do you mean? You hold me all the time," she assures me lovingly as she pulls her knee up and rests it between my legs, snuggling even deeper into my body.

"Not really. You always hold me." I continue to rub my arms up and down her back and rest my lips on her slightly sweaty forehead.

_It's true. _

I don't know what kind of roles we have fallen into, but feeling her lying in my arms, her head on my chest, and my arms wrapped protectively around her, I come to the realization that most nights, when we sink into bed, watching our _Friends_, talking about our days, that I am in her arms, and not the other way around.

And it makes me feel guilty.

As if I don't already feel guilty enough for forcing her to spend the greater part of the last couple of weeks eating dinner alone, communicating with me mostly by phone, and fighting to stay up to kiss me goodnight…this epiphany that Ashley does not get to lay in my arms, feeling comforted and loved, in the way always she does for me…

Well its wrong.

"I like holding you," she assures me as she places a few light kisses to my collar bone.

"Do you like me holding you?" I inquire, slipping my hands under her t-shirt so I can feel her warm skin on my finger tips.

She sighs and lifts her head to meet my stare.

"I love it," she announces, leaning up to capture my lips in a long, tender kiss that leaves me breathless, and causes a stirring in the place her leg is currently resting against.

And as I roll her gently on her back and slide my body completely over hers, resting both arms on either side of her body, I silently vow to do two things:

Work harder to get home earlier at night so I can spend time with the beautiful brunette who is currently kissing in an way that signals to me that she may not be going back to sleep anytime soon.

AND

Hold Ashley as much as she holds me.

It's only fair. And it really, really felt so good…


	18. To Kill A Mockingbird

Chapter 18: To Kill a Mockingbird

Ashley's POV

So her semester is finally over.

Her first semester of college, and she passed with flying colors.

Okay, her grades have not been officially released, but I know my baby, and I know how hard she has been working.

And I know she passed.

With flying colors.

I am packing the car with our luggage.

We are going home to the Carlin's for Christmas.

And I am tucking my present for her tightly away under the seat of her 4-Runner.

It's going to be a very, very…

VERY good Christmas.

"Hey, lover. You ready to hit the road," I hear her whisper in my ear as I shut the back of her SUV before turning to face her.

And the tingles that surge through my body remind me that it is going to be a long few weeks at 'Casa De Carlin'.

I turn fully to pull her into my arms and her lips meet mine immediately.

And as her tongue plunges in my mouth, I can't help but wonder…

And I force the fact that I just pulled a Carrie Bradshaw moment from my mind…

But I still can't help but wonder…

Will Spencer and I not be able to have sex the entire time we are sleeping in her childhood bed?

And worse…

Will I not be allowed to sleep with her in that childhood bed since we are not, like, married?

Oh, sweet God above, get your tongue out of my mouth and let the flood that just erupted in my nether-regions subside….

"Baby…"

She pulls back from my arms and looks quizzically at me before realization sinks in.

"Huh…" I mutter as I shake my head a few times before fumbling to pull her to me again.

"Ash, don't worry. I cannot wait to fuck you senseless under my parents' roof."

She levels me with an assuring stare and I drop the car keys clumsily before retrieving them and nodding towards the passenger seat.

"Let's go."

…

I ease the 4-Runner into the Carlins' driveway, before throwing a nervous look in her direction.

She shakes her head and chuckles before bringing one hand to her lips and kissing it reassuringly.

"Ash…really? My mom has been asking about you for weeks…months even."

She hops out of the car upon finishing this announcement and moves around to the back of her car.

I pull an unsteady breath in before exiting the car and joining her, helping her pull our luggage from the back.

"What time is it?" She inquires, rather oddly, if I do say so…

"Uh, 8:45." I respond as I retrieve the last of our things from the car and move around so I am standing next to her in her parents' driveway.

"Okay, so we have about two hours and fifteen minutes before my parents are ready for bed, and I am figuring out what I need to shove in your mouth to stifle your…"

"Spencer! Ashley! You made it!"

_Two hours._

_Fourteen minutes._

_I think I can make it…_

…

"Mom, we are less than an hour away!" Spencer reminds Paula as she pours another glass of wine and wipes her tears away.

"Oh, honey, I know but…"

Paula chokes back more tears before glancing sideways at Arthur, who is shifting uncomfortably on the couch and stifling a yawn.

"But we just miss you…both of you," Paula adds as she smiles at me, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and pulling me into a dramatic hug.

You would have thought we were coming back from Paris…

Where I am seriously considering moving to if this keeps up…

"Girls, it's so good to have you home. Your mom and I miss you every day," Arthur interjects before yanking his wife from the living room couch.

_Your mom and I…_

I feel a flood of warmth, but then sadness overtakes me at the sentiment.

"We miss you, too," I half lie as I stand to pull Paula into a warm embrace.

Don't get me wrong…love Mr. and Mrs. C…but for the sake…

"Mom, we are here for a week and we love you like crazy. Dad, we love you, too," my blond counter-part slides in at the perfect moment.

Perfect cause Paula has started to sob.

And I am really fucking tired.

"Ok…so the sheets on your old bed are clean."

_Um…that was Paula. _

And…um…she did not follow it up with 'Glen is in Paris visiting Chelsey so, Ashley, his room is ready for you'.

HOT DIGGITY DAMN!

…

"You know what I always wanted to do back in high school," Spencer coos seductively as she slides between the sheets, both of us washed and brushed and ready for bed.

Feeling her thigh slip in between my legs, I moan slightly and turn my face to look fully at her.

"If it is anything like what I always wanted to do in high school, we are SO on the same page," I murmur as I take her face in my hands and begin peppering her cheek and neck with wet kisses.

_We never had sex in her room. _

Well, we tried, mind you me, but Paula Carlin ruined that moment when she drug me kicking and screaming by my hair, half naked, out of the very room we are now laying in…again…

Half naked.

And OH.

MY.

GOD.

My body is reacting as she shifts her weight and rolls on top of me.

"We never fucked in my childhood room," she announces as she rips my tank top from my shaking body."

"Uhh….No…No, we never did," I agree.

…

And seven hours later, as I hear the birds chirping and see the sunlight begin to creep into Spencer's childhood room…

We finally finish 'fucking'.

And by 'fucking', I mean making sweet, then rowdy, then soft, then sensual, then aggressive, then tender, then fucking ridiculously hot and passionate love to one another.

All the while never uttering a sound that could have urged Mrs. C to never let us sleep in the same room together under her roof again.

…

"Do y… realize … much I …. you?" 

I pull her warm and sweaty body to me as the mockingbird outside her window strengthens the sound of his song.

"What?"

I cannot hear her over that damn bird.

"Do you ha.. … idea … much … I ..ve you?"

Her voice is louder but between my exhaustion and the piercing hoots and hollers of that bird, I still am not sure what she is saying.

"Baby…I can't hear you."

I pull her more tightly against my bare back and shiver as her warm breath hits my ear.

"Tell me…u…ll…rry….someday."

"I'll what someday?" I groan as I turn to face her fully.

And I am met with her beautiful but serious blue orbs.

"Never mind…" she sighs, before placing a long, sweet kiss on my swollen lips. "I hope I …er have to…it again."

Jesus…WHAT?

I am going to fucking KILL that mockingbird.


	19. Last Christmas

Chapter 19: Last Christmas…

Spencer's POV

"So…when do you want to exchange presents?" she whispers in my neck as I fumble to put my clothes back on, the smell of bacon wafting from the kitchen, alerting me that the rents are up and that at any moment, there could be a knock on the door.

"On Christmas morning, silly," I respond with a smirk, knowing full well Ashley has the patience of a 5 year-old and probably wants her gift at this very moment.

"But that's two whole days away!" She moans as I toss her tank top and shorts to her and rise from the bed.

I stifle a giggle and turn to her as I pull a t-shirt over my torso. She pouts a bit as my stomach disappears for the next fourteen hours or so…

"Babe, it's CHRISTMAS. We should exchange our presents on Christmas morning."

We had this same debate last year, but I am not surprised we are having it again this morning.

"Fine," she groans as she rises from the bed and heads to the bathroom to brush her teeth.

"Howrr…bout…ee…oo…one…rsent…toite…"

_SPIT_.

Even through her mouth full of foamy toothpaste, I know exactly what she said.

"Okay, ONE! Meet me in the kitchen!" I shout as I open the door and start to leave the room.

"Spence, WAIT!" she calls out and I turn to see her standing in the doorway of the bathroom, her head tilted slightly right, a needy look on her face.

"What babe?"

"Come here…" she coos, opening her arms to me.

I smile and walk the distance of the room to her, allowing her to pull me firmly against her body. She gives me a soft kiss and then pulls me tighter into a sweet, tender hug.

We stand there for a while, swaying just slightly, her arms wrapped firmly around my waist, squeezing lightly here and there, my arms just as firmly around her back, my face buried in her neck.

_Mmmmm….it feels so nice. _

"I love you, baby," she whispers before giving me a longer kiss and releasing me from her arms.

"I love you too, Ash." I nod seriously and give her hand a quick squeeze.

"Be down in a minute," she promises, and I give her a quick peck before making my way down the stairs to find my mom and dad standing in the kitchen, whipping up a mouthwatering breakfast.

"Morning, hon," my dad smiles before leaning over to kiss my cheek.

"Hi Dad, hi Mom," I smile as I glance over their shoulders to see what's cookin'.

"Good morning, sweetie. Where's Ashley?" My mom inquires as she stirs the eggs carefully.

"Just getting changed and stuff. Can I help?" I offer as I begin untwisting the bread tie.

"No, we have it, sweetheart. How about you pour a cup of coffee and have a seat." My dad flips the pancakes masterfully before winking at me.

"Yes, sweetie. You've worked so hard this semester. Let your father and I wait on you for a few days," my mom smiles as she hands me two coffee mugs.

_Aw…how sweet._

"Okay, I don't think I can argue with that!" I beam as I pour two cups of coffee, leaving one black for Ashley and adding some cream and sugar to my own.

I place Ashley's mug on the bar in front of the empty stool and slide onto my own, propping my head on my hands to watch my parents at work.

They are quite the team, handing ingredients back and forth, moving effortlessly around the kitchen as they continue preparing our breakfast, sharing loving smiles and winks.

At one point, my dad bends down and gives my mom a loving kiss before truing to grab the orange juice from the refrigerator. It was so simple, and yet my heart filled with love for them both in this moment.

_What would I do without them?_

_Both of them…_

I shudder a bit, remembering how they almost split up around this time two years ago.

And about this time last year, Ashley and I almost did as well.

Flashback.

We are at Greys.

Christmas break has just begun.

And Carmen is here.

My heart dropped into my stomach when I saw Carmen approaching us, shaking her hips confidently and smiling at me.

And my heart dropped even further when I saw the look on Ashley's face.

My mind racing with thoughts of how to best control the situation, I stand up and place myself in between my girlfriend and my ex.

I see Ashley rise out of the corner of my eyes and feel her move in behind me.

_Shit_.

"Spencer, you're looking good," Carmen oozes, displaying even more confidence than the little sashay she put on as she approached.

"Yeah, she is," Ashley retorts possessively and I feel her move to my side and throw her arm around my shoulder, pulling me flush against her.

"Hi, Carmen," I reply shortly, searching the bar for the nearest exit.

Ignoring Ashley's presence completely, she continues, all the while looking me up and down seductively.

"So is this that chick that cheated on you and went all hetero?" she inquires, the smirk on her face growing wider as she takes in Ashley's furious reaction.

I feel Ashley's arm begin to shake, and I glance at her out of the corner of my eye.

Her face is beet red and her teeth are gritted together so tightly I am worried she may crack one.

"Carmen, shut up."

First of all, I never told her Ashley cheated, because technically we were broken up when she went 'all hetero'.

Second, Carmen has no right to judge Ashley's treatment of me. Not after what she did…

"You got a problem, bitch?"

And that would be Ashley.

And her arm is no longer wrapped around me.

No.

In fact both of her arms are at her sides, he fists clenched in tight balls as she takes a step towards Carmen.

"Nah, no problem. But hey, I have this really hot friend, LUKE," she emphasizes. "Yeah, he's right over there. Perhaps you can go get acquainted so I can pick back up where I left with this hot blonde all those months ago,"

"Carmen, SHUT UP!" I shout as I see Ashley lunge towards her. I grab her fully by the waist and pull her back, tightening my grip as she tries to wriggle free.

"Ashley, no, come on," I urge her calmly as I continue pulling her backwards, before taking her by the hand and yanking her towards the bathroom.

Crashing inside, she yanks her hand from my grasp, and turns to face me.

Her face is redder than before, and she is trembling with anger.

"What the FUCK, Spencer?" She practically screams as the bathroom clears out quickly.

"Ash, calm down, babe. She's not worth it," I assure her as I reach out to try to calm her down.

"Not worth it, eh?" she spats as her face shifts from anger to cruel sarcasm. "If she's so 'not worth it'," she continues, using air quotes for emphasis, "then why did you even date her?"

Is she really questioning what I did after what happened between us last year?

"Ashley, it's ancient history, and there is absolutely NO reason to drudge up the past at this point."

We've never really talked about Carmen, and I am sure she has wanted to know as little about what happened between us and I have about what happened between her and Aiden during our break-up.

"Did you fuck her?" She spats coolly as she steps back and leans against the sink.

"Ashley…" I protest as I squeeze my eyes shut, feeling my face begin to grow as red as hers is.

"Did you FUCK her?" She repeats more loudly this time.

"Ashley, stop it," I command, losing control of the volume of my own voice.

"DID…YOU…FUCK…HER?"

"NO I DIDN'T FUCK HER, BUT YOU SURE AS HELL FUCKED AIDEN!"

Her face goes blank, and I feel hot tears pouring from my eyes.

"Spencer," she attempts, her anger subsiding and panic filling her eyes.

"NO, you know what, Ashley? FUCK…"

And I bite my tongue.

_Don't say it._

_You love her, despite the fact she is being cruel and hypocritical._

_Don't say it. _

She flinches a bit, and then runs her fingers through her hair before pushing herself from the sink and moving towards me.

I hold my hands up defensively, forcing her to stop dead in her tracks.

"You know what, Ashley. It's been a process for me, to forgive you. To forget how you abandoned me after Clay died. To forget how five minutes after I told you I needed space, you were in HIS arms."

I am crying steadily at this point, and I see the tears begin to fall from her eyes at this point as well.

"But you proved yourself to me, and I fell in love with you all over again. Hell, I never really fell out of love with you, Ashley."

I watch her face fall and her head lower to the ground.

"But despite the fact that you tore my heart out of my chest, threw it on the ground, and then jumped up and down on it, I forgave you, gave my heart back to you, and put my trust fully back into to you. And this…"

I thrust my finger towards the door, indicating I am referring to the Carmen incident.

"This is how you repay me. By questioning me, making me feel like some sort of whore? Like it would have somehow wronged you if I HAD slept with her? All the while, you were allowed to do whatever you damn well pleased, including sleeping with the ONE person that you KNEW would hurt me the most?"

I can hardly breathe at this point, and Ashley looks as if she's been slapped in the face.

"No, ASHLEY, I didn't FUCK her. I barely kissed her, because somewhere in the depths of my heart and soul, I knew you were it for me. And on the off chance that you came back and could prove yourself to me, I didn't want anything or anyone to come in between the greatest, truest more pure love I'd ever know."

Her face is in her hands and she is sobbing at this point.

But I don't feel bad for her.

I feel bad for myself, for sacrificing everything to be with her and having her treat me like this.

"And for the record, I don't sleep with people who physically abuse me…just apparently those who are emotionally cruel to me."

Her head whips up at this announcement, and her swollen reddish-brown eyes find my equally swollen reddish-blue ones."

"What do you mean…" her voice trails off as I watch it all register.

"Nothing, Ashley," I whisper as I turn towards the door. "Forget it, okay?"

"Spencer, wait!" She grabs my arm firmly before instinctively loosening her grip, her eyes growing tender. "Baby, did she…did she hurt you?"

Her eyes are unsure and filled with pain.

"Ashley, I told you, it's ancient history and I really don't want to dig up the past anymore," I inform her flatly.

But I know her, and this explanation will not satisfy her.

She gives me a long, sad look before bolting from the bathroom.

I follow her and watch her make her way across the bar to Glen, who is standing at the bar, whispering into Chelsey's ear.

I watch as she pulls him aside and they engage in a heated conversation.

And I know exactly what confirmation she receives from him as she turns towards me, tears flowing from her eyes as she shakes her head at me and squeezes her eyes shut.

I start towards her but she is gone in a flash. I reach Glen, and the confusion on his face tells me just what I need to know.

"You never told her?" He half questions, half states as I lean against the bar and shake my head.

"Shit, Spence. I'm sorry. I just figured…"

"It's okay, Glen. It's not your fault," I assure him as he hands me a glass of water. Chelsey moves around and grabs my hand sweetly.

"What happened, Spencer?" She asks softly, her kind eyes displaying sympathy as she takes in my disheveled appearance and tear stained face.

"Carmen happened. Again."

It's all I can muster up, and I feel the tears welling up again. Just as Glen is wrapping me in his arms, I hear shouting from across the bar. Pulling from him, I turn to find Ashley yanking Carmen towards the door by her hair.

"Oh, fuck!" I shout as I race towards them.

Glen is hot on my heels and shoves past me in time to pull Ashley back from Carmen, who takes a fistful of her long, black hair with her.

Before I know it, we are all being ushered out the door into the night air by the staff, a crowd forming around us, taking in the scene.

"I should have you arrested, you bitch!" Carmen shouts as she rubs the area of her head where Ashley practically scalped her.

"You don't have the guts," Ashley spits back, Glen's hold tightening around her as she attempts to lunge at Carmen again. "Anyone who would lay their hands on someone as sweet and wonderful as Spencer is clearly a coward."

Carmen face drops, and embarrassment sweeps over it as the crowd grows silent and strangers' faces turn to her with disapproving glares. I hear a soft murmur begin to sweep through the crowd as they acknowledge what has just been revealed.

I feel humiliated myself, but I am more concerned with Ashley and if she really just got herself in trouble with the law.

"That what she told you?" Carmen smirks as she shakes her head at me. "Such a lying little cry-baby," she finishes with a cruel chuckle.

"She's never lied about a thing in her life, you stupid bitch. Well, save the time she told me you 'aren't that bad'."

Carmen glares at me and then Ashley again, Glen continuing to hold her back as her cheeks grow redder and redder.

"Whatever you say, straight girl," Carmen retorts snidely. "I'm out of here. Good luck, BOTH OF YOU."

And with that, she disappears into the night.

The crowd begins to dissipate, leaving Chelsey, Glen, Ashley and I alone in front of the club.

Glen finally releases Ashley and she walks a few feet from the club, rubbing her face and then threading her fingers through her hair. I can see she is still shaking, and my I feel a stinging in my chest.

Glen pulls me to him and gives me a long hug.

"You okay, little sister?" He whispers before pulling back and staring me in the eyes.

"Yeah, I'm okay. Thank, Glen."

He nods before glancing over at Ashley, who is standing with her back to us, her hands on her knees, her body convulsing.

"You want a few minutes?" He asks, understanding what has gone on and knowing what I probably need.

"Yeah, you mind?" I smile at Chelsey who returns the smile and grabs Glen's hand.

"Come find us when you're finished. I'll take you guys home, okay?" He urges, and I smile gratefully at him.

They disappear into the club, and I turn to face Ashley. She is still standing with her back to me, but she is upright at this point.

I take in a long, shaky breath before starting towards her.

Sensing my presence, she slowing turns to me, and my heart breaks when I take her in.

Tears are pouring from her eyes, and her face is scrunched in what can only be descried as agony.

"I'm so sorry, baby. I am so, so, so sorry," she chokes out as sobs rack her body.

She pulls me into her arms and buries her face in my neck, her sobs becoming violent.

The hurt and anger in my heart resulting from what happened earlier are not completely gone, but I cannot help but hold her tightly to me, my arms rubbing soothingly up and down her back, my lips kissing her temple repeatedly as she goes limp in my arms.

"I will never, never, EVER treat you like that again," she manages to choke out before pulling back and taking my face in her trembling hands.

I allow her to pull my face to hers, resting my forehead against her own, my heart bursting with love for this selfish, jealous, temperamental, passionate girl in my arms.

"No one will ever lay another hand on you again. No one will never hurt you again. I'm so sorry. I am such an asshole…" Her voice trials off as her lips crash against mine.

She's not off the hook, and she WILL know exactly why her actions were wrong and almost cost her…

Well…

Me tonight.

But right now, in her arms, her soft lips against mine, our tears mixing and falling together down our cheeks, I know…

This Christmas is not the one I am going to lose her.

And it's not the one she will lose me.

…

End of Flashback.

"Good morning, Carlins!" I hear her chirp as she takes a seat next to me at the bar just as my parents have begun plating our breakfast. She spots the mug of black coffee sitting in front of her and I see her smile before taking it into her hand before turning to me.

_Thank you, baby_, she mouths before taking a small sip.

_God, I love this girl. _

Last Christmas is all the sudden a distant memory as I take her hand and lead her to the kitchen table.

And as my parents place two overflowing plates of food in front of us and join us, beaming at us both like adoring parents, I slide one hand under the table and give her thigh a soft squeeze.

Last Christmas, I gave her my heart…

For good.

And thank God, the very next day I decided not to take it away.


	20. Christmas Eve

Chapter 20: Christmas Eve

Ashley's POV

"Alright, gang…who wants more hot cocoa?" Arthur calls from the kitchen at the three women huddle in the living room, Spencer and her mom on the couch, me sitting on the floor in front of Spencer, her hand placed tenderly on my shoulder.

"Only if we can have more Peppermint Schnapps," Spencer requests as her mom giggles and downs the rest of her 'cocktail.'

Paula is a bit of a lightweight, I surmise, as she high-fives her daughter.

"Yessss, honey, make us another round," she somewhat slurs, and I giggle inwardly.

"Jesus, ladies, really?" Arthur responds, poking his head around the corner to be met with three serious stares.

"Arthur, its Christmas!" Paula scolds him and he gives her a sheepish shrug.

"Sorry…Golly, you lushes, really?" He corrects with a twinkle in his eyes.

We all laugh at the failed attempt to behave himself on this, the holiest of nights.

Spencer squeezes my shoulder lovingly before Arthur reappears with the bottle of Schnapps. He puts a healthy pour into each mug and then a few heaping spoonfuls of cocoa mix. He trots back to the kitchen and is back in a few seconds with a tea kettle of hot water.

After the drinks are properly stirred, he slides into the free lazy-boy and raises his mug.

We all join him as he clears his throat.

"To another Carlin family Christmas…well minus some Carlins and with the addition of a Davies." He winks at me before continuing. "But Ash, you're one of the family now, so help you God."

"Arthur! Christmas!" Paula levels him with a glare and I hear Spencer chuckle.

"Sorry, God," Arthur 'apologizes' as he thumps his chest a couple times with a closed fist before pointing at the heavens.

This causes me to truly lose it, and I cannot help but turn to catch Paula's reaction.

She attempts another glare but is soon crumbling with laugher along with the rest of us.

"SO, Ashley, one of the great Carlin family traditions is to open one gift on Christmas Eve." He beams at me and I feel a little giddy, like a child almost, at the thought.

"Okaaay…" I draw out, excited but unsure as to which gifts I should contribute.

"So, Paula and I got you both a few things, but we have already selected your Christmas Eve gift."

He throws Paula a wink before rising and walking over to the Christmas tree. He leans down and fumbles with a few packages before selecting two and walking towards us.

"Ashley, this one is for you, and Spence, this is yours," he beams as he places two perfectly wrapped presents in both of our hands.

I feel my heart leap up into my throat.

They bought ME a gift?

They possibly bought me more than one gift seeing as Arthur has announced this a few moments ago.

I mean, I guess he could have meant they got Spencer a few things and me just this gift.

But it really doesn't matter.

Sitting here, in the middle of this cozy living room, sipping warm cocktails, with my girlfriend's hand on my shoulder, and being fully accepted by her family…

He could have handed me a stocking with a lump of coal and it couldn't kill the high I am on right now.

"Arthur, Paula, gosh…you really shouldn't have…" I whisper as I finger the silver bow adorning my gift.

"Nonsense, Ashley. It's Christmas, and we love you, just like you were one of my own."

I swear I feel my heart stop in this moment.

My eyes fill up with tears immediately and I turn to face Paula, the person who uttered that last sentence, and am met with the warmest eyes and the most sincere smile I could ever imagine.

That is until I pull my stare from her and meet the only person in the world who could make me even happier than Paula Carlin just did.

Spencer just nods her head at me and tilts her head slighlty to the right.

I choke back the tears that are threatening to fall, and shake my head.

"Wow…um…thanks…thanks so much." I choke out.

"You haven't even opened it yet!' Arthur reminds me, and I laugh lightly.

I continue to finger the bow and the shiny red and green wrapping for a few more seconds.

"Well…OPEN IT!" Arthur commands, but his eyes twinkle just the same.

"Dad, kinda bossy," Spencer teases and he just sticks his tongue out at her.

He should thank his lucky stars he's not Glen.

"Alright, alright," I laugh as I swallow for good the lump in my throat.

I slide the bow off and carefully pull apart the wrapping, careful not to tear it anymore than I have to.

A small, white box awaits me and I feel my hands begin to tremble as I lift the lid.

_What on earth could Spencer's parents have bought me? What do they think I like? _

As I finally lift the lid, I adjust my eyes on the contents.

It's tickets.

Like concert tickets or something.

But to what?

I lift the tickets out of the box and focus on the black print.

**The Philharmonic Symphony**.

And my mind is swirling with all the reasons this gift is perfect.

And the tears I fought so hard to avoid earlier win the battle.

I glance up and find Arthur's eyes first, looking unsure, as he appears to be holding his breath.

I turn next to look at Paula, and note the identical look upon her face.

"It's…I…um…wow…"

_Jesus Ashley, really? That's all you can come up with?_

"Well, Spencer sort of mentioned that your dad, well…" I hear Arthur's voice break just a little and I am overwhelmed. He clears his throat and continues. "That your dad really loved the symphony, despite being a rock star. And she said you've never been. So…"

And I am on my feet in seconds, crashing into him and throwing my arms tightly around his back.

I am crying steadily now, and he wraps his strong, fatherly arms around me and squeezes me tightly.

"Thank you, Arthur…" I choke out. "It's so thoughtful."

He pats my back lovingly as I pull from his embrace before turning to Paula, who is absolutely beaming at this point. I slide down onto the couch in between she and Spencer and take both her hands into mine.

"I've never been…" I repeat Arthur's words and she nods in acknowledgement.

"I know, Ashley," she nods in understanding.

I mean, its not like I cannot afford the symphony. I could probably afford to BUY a symphony of my own.

But it was my dad's secret love, something he often talked about doing with me, and something he never did before he…

"And honestly, you two need a little culture," she teases, easing the tension in the room, caused by me and my stupid emotions. "I mean, the crap you two blare on your I-Pods sometimes…" She smiles and shakes her head as we all erupt into laughter for the umpteenth time tonight.

"Our music is awesome, MOM," Spencer protests, and I turn to her, aware for the first time in minutes that she is even in the room.

And trust me, that NEVER happens.

I lock my eyes on her and crinkle my nose, making sure she knows how much I love this gift, her family, and most of all her.

She must have somehow, at some point, told her parents about my dad's unexpected love of the orchestra, how I was always waiting for him to take me, to teach me about a music that wasn't rock-n-roll, and to share that part of his life with him.

And how I missed out on all of that because he…

"Spence, you're up."

Arthur's announcement yanks me out of the funk I was about to slide into, and I hug Paula quickly before we all turn our attention onto my girl.

She literally rips her package open.

Apparently this is not as big a deal to her as it was me…

Throwing the wrapping aside, she tears the top off her own white box, and pulls two similar looking pieces of cardboard-like paper from it, looking perplexed as she glances from her father to her mother before reading the print for a second time.

"Two tickets to the Philharmonic Symphony?"

She looks utterly dazed.

"And guess who's coming with you?"

Paula and Arthur are grinning from ear to ear…

…

After several more 'Peppermint Patties', as Arthur has informed us is the proper name, I rise and excuse myself for a minute.

I ascend the stairs and enter Spencer's room. I find my duffle and dig into it.

Finding what I was searching for, I head back downstairs…

To find…

Paula and Spencer taking a shot of Peppermint Schnapps.

And I couldn't make it up if I tried.

"Um…what did I miss?" I inquire, casting a sideways glance at Arthur, who is shaking his head and pulling his fingers through his curly black hair.

"Absolutely nothing," he informs me flatly as I smirk and turn to watch Paula wipes some stray liquor from the side of her mouth.

_When did Paula Carlin become such a lush?_

_And why am I being such a square?_

"C'mon, Ash, do one!" Spencer encourages me as she pours a shot and hands it to me.

_Is this really happening? _

_Am I getting drunk off of fucking Schnapps with the CARLINS?_

"Only if Arthur joins me," I insist and she nods enthusiastically as she pours him a shot as well.

"Oh no, not this guy," he protests as she thrusts the shot in his face.

"DAD! Don't be such an old fogey."

_AND…now it's on. _

You DON'T call Arthur Carlin and 'old' anything.

I give him a challenging look as we clink our shot glasses together.

And just as I raise my own to my lips, he does something that takes us ALL by surprise.

He sets his shot glass down, grabs the bottle, and takes a long, hard slam.

I mean, he swallows a few times, and keeps right on chugging.

I slam my shot down and feel my eyes immediately sting.

And some ten seconds or so later, he places the bottle back on the coffee table with a long, dramatic 'Ahhhhhh'….

"Jesus Christ, DAD!" Spencer cries in disbelief.

"SPENCER CARLIN, IT'S CHRISTMAS! FOR GOD'S SAKE!"

And we all whip around to face Paula, stunned.

And the loudest burst of laughter I think I have ever heard fills the cozy and festive living room.

…

Steadying myself on the floor, I wipe the tears from my eyes, remembering I have something for…well…them...

"So, um…Paula, Arthur, since it's tradition and all…I have a gift I'd like you both to open."

I feel Spencer's hand find its way back to my shoulder and it sends tingles through my whole body.

I cannot remember the last time I felt this way on Christmas.

I'm overwhelmed.

"Now, Ashley, the tradition is for the kids. You don't have to give us anything!" Paula exclaims as she covers her mouth with one hand, almost looking giddy, just as I must have all those moments ago.

"Well, your kids are just rotten then, cause you should get a gift on Christmas Eve as well," I say, attempting to look at Spencer in disapproval.

But one look at her adoring face, and I melt into a full-fledged grin.

"Here, open it together…" I urge as I hand the present to Paula. Arthur smiles at me as he lifts himself from his recliner and moves around so he can slide in next to his wife.

"Well, OPEN IT!" I mimic his earlier insistence and he laughs as he throws an arm around Paula, who has started to un-do the wrapping.

I watch as the pull a long, flat box from the paper and lift the lid.

And I could never have anticipated what would happen next.

Paula's hand goes to her mouth again, and tears fall immediately.

Arthurs lifts his head and gives me the third sweetest look I have seen all night.

"Oh, Ashley…" Paula's voice drifts off as she pulls the frame from the box.

It's a photograph, in case the frame part didn't give it away.

And it's of Arthur, Paula, Glen, Chelsey, Spencer…and Me.

On Spencer's graduation day from High School.

The frame is silver, and across the bottom, in simple cursive, reads Family.

Aiden took it, bless his bone-headed heart.

And I certainly thought it was perfect when I had it developed.

But I didn't know until this moment, watching Paula cry as she traces the glass with a finger, and watching Arthur beam back and forth between the three women in the room…

Just how perfect it really was.

…

"I love you," she whispers as we crawl into bed, finally putting the Schnapps away for good and saying goodnight to her parents.

"You do?" I tease as I pull her to me and kiss her forehead.

"Of course I do…but after tonight, with my parents...baby I love you so, so much."

And I'm mush.

I capture her lips in a long, passionate kiss and run my fingers through her long, blonde hair.

"I love you, too…soo, soooo, soooo much." I reply. I feel her grind herself into me and attempt to roll on top of me.

"Wait!" I announce and hear a profound groan as I roll out form under her and rise from the bed.

"Your ONE present on Christmas Eve time!" I announce, watching the frustration on her face be replaced quickly with excitement.

"Yay! Okay…you first!" She exclaims as she juts her flat palms out at me.

I laugh loudly as I fish into my duffle. "I assume by that you mean, I give YOU yours first," I tease as she nods through a toothy grin. "Yeah, I figured."

I slide in next to her and place a gift bag in her awaiting hands. It has a snowman on the front and is filled with red tissue paper.

Spencer loves snowmen.

I mean, I've never actually seen one, seeing as snow is not a common occurrence her in L.A., but I know she made her fair share back in Ohio, and she does love her some old-school Frost The Snowman Christmas Special…and dammed if she doesn't sing that song all the freakin time.

"Mmmm, what is it?" she inquires, her huge blue eyes filled with anticipation as she begins yanking the tissue paper from the sack before reaching her hand inside.

And her face goes blank.

And then I see the recognition I was hoping for.

And then I see the excitement I was really hoping for.

And then I see the lust I was really, REALLY hoping for.

As she pulls the gift from the sack, she glances back and forth between the 'thing' in her hands to me.

"But we have one," she starts, and I nod.

"But its not this big…" she continues, and I nod again, biting my lower lip.

"Merry Christmas?" I raise an eyebrow.

She fiddles around with the 'gift' for a few minutes.

I sit uneasily on the edge of the bed.

"Um, my turn?"

And next thing I know, I am on my back…

And I never get my Christmas Eve present…

Well…not the one wrapped in Spencer's own duffle.

But I got so, SO much more.

Merry Christmas…HOLY SHIT!


	21. Christmas Morning

Chapter 21: Christmas Morning

Spencer's POV

Sometimes I cannot believe the things we do to one another.

It's amazing and hot and sensual…and it blows my mind.

We are lying here in my childhood bed, Ashley's Christmas Eve present tucked neatly in my nightstand drawer, and our bodies entangled tightly as the first light of morning begins to peek its way through my window.

We are both still naked, and a bit damp from the previous night…and morning.

I pull her more tightly to me and kiss her flushed cheek softly, feeling her stir a bit.

"Merry Christmas, baby," I whisper, earning a grin from her as she lifts her head up from her pillow and opens her eyes.

"Holy shit," she whispers back, and I giggle, trying to erase the night's events from my mind, knowing we have to get up soon and meet my parents downstairs, and that taking any trips down that memory lane will render me unable to do anything but fumble into the nightstand and pick up where we left off.

I sit up straight and pull the cool sheets up over my chest. I watch her flip on her side and prop herself up on one elbow, eyeing me almost greedily as she reaches out to stroke my arm.

I shudder under her touch and cock my head to the side to gaze lovingly down on her.

She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen, lying there with messy brown curls, her eyes sleepy but content.

I love her so much.

So very, very much.

And it scares and excites me, all at the same time.

I sometimes wonder how to express how much I love her…how much I cannot imagine my life without her.

I cannot tell her adequately how beautiful she is, how hot and sexy she is, and I just don't think I will ever have the words that will come close to describing what she does to me.

It's almost frustrating.

"You think Santa came?" I tease as I run my fingers gently through her messy locks.

"Well, I don't know about Santa, but I sure as hell did," she smirks and I laugh out loud.

"Ashley…" I groan as I shake my head at her.

"What? I am sure Mrs. Clause ain't got nothin' on you, babe." She wiggles her eyebrows at me and I laugh again before leaning down to place a long, soft kiss on her smirking lips.

"I love you, Ashley Davies," I inform her, changing the tone quickly.

I hear her moan and watch her eyes close before they slowly flutter open again and lock on me, her expression serious.

"I love you, too, Spencer Carlin. So very, very much," she responds and I feel my heart melt. "Sometimes I get frustrated that I cannot tell or show you just how much."

_Amazing_.

…

"Merry Christmas!" My dad's voice booms through the entire downstairs as our freshly showered and properly groomed selves find our way downstairs to greet my eager parents.

We still are in our pajamas…a Carlin Family tradition…but we agreed that the smell of sex is a quite obvious one and we'd better attempt to wash it off of us before sharing Christmas morning with my parents.

"Merry Christmas, Dad," I reply warmly as I kiss his cheek before moving to my mother, who is sitting at the bar, sipping on a cup of coffee. "Merry Christmas, Mom," I continue as I hug her warmly.

"Merry Christmas, darlings." She returns my embrace before standing and pulling Ashley into an equally warm hug.

Ashley beams at me from over my mom's shoulder and I hear her mumble a sweet reply. She pulls from my mom and moves to my dad, who pulls her into a bear hug before kissing the top of her head.

"Thanks for letting me be here," she whisper shyly to him and he just laughs and shakes his head.

"Sweetheart, you shouldn't be anywhere else in the world," he beams.

I watch Ashley's expression drop for a millisecond, before a sincere smile finds its way back to her mouth.

I know where she just went, and I reach out to squeeze her hand, signaling just this, before I make us both a cup of coffee.

"So, looks like you girls have been somewhat behaved this year, cause Santa left a few presents under the tree for you both!"

I roll my eyes discretely before handing Ashley a steaming cup of black coffee.

My parents still insist, although I am the ripe old age of 19, that Santa Clause still exists and that some of the gifts under the tree are from him.

And as I see the light in Ashley's eyes intensify at my father's announcement, I am reminded yet again of just how precious such crazy traditions can be.

Fighting the urge to kiss her, and knowing that my parents would probably not mind, but not being entirely ready to display such affection, I shoot her a wink.

Just then, the phone rings.

My mom literally jumps out of her chair and runs to the phone.

"Oh…I bet it's Glen!" She exclaims excitedly, and although I know my big brother is a jack ass at times, I feel the same excitement overcome me at the thought of hearing from him this morning.

"Hello? Glen, son, Merry Christmas!" She cries, and I fight the urge to cover my ears. She fumbles clumsily for the speaker button and in seconds I hear my brother's voice over the line.

"Merry Christmas, guys! Chelsey's here!" he announces and we all huddle tightly around the receiver to hang on to every word.

"Hi, guys. Merry Christmas. Or should I say…Joyeux Noel!"

"Hey Chels," I respond first, realizing how much I miss them both at this moment. "Joyeux Noel to you, too!"

I hear her giggle and then hear Glen mumble something incoherently. "So guys, we set an alarm so we would call just at the right time. Dad, you have cinnamon rolls in the oven. Mom, you are in your reindeer pajamas with a cup of coffee. Spence, you have rolled your eyes a million times at their insistence that Santa came. And Ashley…I'm just sorry girl."

I hear Chelsey's laughter in the background blend with the rest of ours as if she's not oceans away.

"Well, Glen, did you predict that we're all a little hung over this morning because of your parents' new-found love for everything peppermint and schnappsy?" Ashley cuts in, glancing amusedly around the room.

"Say what?" Glen protests and I erupt into another fit of giggles. "Mom, Dad, seriously. I head off to Paris for one little holiday and you go and get all cool on me? Man, Ash, the must really love you."

And I feel silence cast upon the kitchen at this statement.

"We sure do, son. In fact, if you want to stay there in Paris, Ashley makes the perfect replacement for you."

That would be Paula Carlin, and I am not sure the smile on Ashley's face could get any bigger.

"Yeah, we love her like crazy. And my GOD does she smell better than you, son."

That would be Arthur Carlin, but the smell dig he just threw at his son is lost upon both Ashley and I, as I observe her blink back tears.

Clearing her throat, she smiles at me before leaning towards the receiver again.

"Sorry, Glenny Boy," she continues. "Apparently good looks, personality and hygiene are a big plus around here."

I only hear the beginning of Glen's protests, and barely make it through Chelsey's replay of her first semester of art school. And as Glen and Chelsey start into the details of their time in Paris, I am gone.

All I can concentrate on is MY girlfriend, standing between my parents, both of them with their arms around her, all three of them hunched towards the phone, laughing and trading knowing glances, having the most normal conversation imaginable with my brother and HIS girlfriend.

And I miss my brother and Chelsey.

I really do.

But on this Christmas morning, the only person I can see and hear…

Is Ashley.


	22. Knees Part II

Chapter 22: Knees Part II

Spencer's POV

So Christmas break was pretty awesome.

Between the Peppermint Schnapps and the call with Glen and Chels, the wonderful food and constant laughter, the amazing gifts both given and received…

Oh yeah, and speaking of…the fun Ashley and I had in my childhood bed…

I'd call this years' Carlin family Christmas a smashing success.

I've never felt closer to Ashley.

I've never been more sure that she and I are meant to be. That we are meant to spend our lives together.

Watching her interact with my parents.

Watching her eyes light up every time they expressed in their own little ways that she is fully accepted into our family.

It was amazing.

We are so perfectly connected at this stage in our lives that I am positive we are past the rough times.

We are solid, and as I ease into the second semester of college, I am so excited to continue to build my life with her as we both continue to work on our futures, both professionally and personally.

_Fast-Forward three months…_

"Ashley, knock it off, okay?"

"Knock WHAT off, Spenc-ER?"

Why does she find it necessary to stress the 'er' of my name when we are fighting?

I mean, I am Spence, or babe, or baby, my personal favorite.

But when we are arguing, I am all the sudden Spenc-ER.

It drives me crazy.

I throw up my hands in exasperation and toss my text book loudly onto the coffee table, glaring at her all the while.

"Are you happy, Ashley? Is this what you want? For me to flunk out of school so I can be you little housewife?" I feel my voice falter at the last statement, while fighting to keep my composure.

"Yes, of course, Spenc-ER. That's all I've ever wanted," she bites back and I cringe at her continuous use of my full name, with her special Ashley touch.

"Then get off my fuckin' back, Ash-LEY!"

_There, how's that feel, sweetheart?_

"You know what, Spence? I have been nothing but supportive of you. I've eaten more meals alone than I ever signed up for when we started all of this. I fall asleep hugging your pillow instead of you more nights than not. And I swear to God, Jordan sees more of you than I do," she throws in, for 'good measure'.

Though I am a little happy to hear Spence fall from her lips.

Shaking this thought from my head, I rise from the couch and join her in the kitchen.

"Is this about Jordan, AGAIN?" I shake my head in disapproval after she fails to tell me just how wrong I should be.

I wait a good ten seconds more for her to assure me that she is not still insecure about my friendship with Jordan, and when she continues to fail to give me the reassurance I need to confirm that she trusts me, as she should, I storm from the kitchen, fumbling for my purse and keys.

"Maybe I should just fuck her Ash. I mean, never mind the fact she is straight, practically engaged, and does nothing for me. Maybe if I just fucked her, then we can finally confirm all your deepest darkest fears that I, too, am capable of sleeping with someone else I am not in love with. Would that make you feel better?"

I turn to face her as I sling my purse over my shoulder.

And find her standing facing me, silent tears falling down her face, which is contorted in a look of pure and total pain.

I feel my heart sink for a moment, but stubborn Spencer will not loose this battle.

"Where are you going?" she whispers softly, and I contemplate throwing my purse down and running to her.

But I don't.

"Out."

…

"Well, I am a freshman at UCLA. Studying photography," I tell her, taking another sip of the vodka she has bought me.

Her.

I bet you are wondering who this 'her' is, aren't you?

Well, she's a pretty attractive brunette. One who came up to me almost the minute I sat down at the bar of the _Cherry Bomb_.

My favorite dive bar near campus.

Did I mention she has reds streaks in her bangs?

Well, she does.

How funny, huh?

"Photography? Wow, that's cool. What made you get into taking pictures?"

She's interested.

VERY interested, if you know what I mean.

And I'm drunk, pissed, sad and not thinking clearly.

Recipe for disaster.

"Well, I used to want to be a film-maker. Back in high school, I shot a few movies. I actually was friends with a girl from MTV. She was a film-maker who shot a documentary about my brother…Clay. See, he died. Was shot in a drive-by on prom night…"

Her eyes grow wide with shock and sympathy as she orders us another round.

"So I worked with Lily a little. She helped me with my senior project. And it was pretty good. But, I don't know…taking pictures to me…it's more of a challenge. You know, you have to capture the story in a shot…and I guess I like that challenge."

I grab the fresh drink the girl has set in front of me.

"Thanks…um…"

"Cassie," she reminds me, for the third time.

"Right, Cassie, sorry." I smile sheepishly and take a long sip.

"Well, I am sure you know how to capture quite the story. I bet you are very talented." She smiles and winks at me as she pulls from her own glass.

"Oh…I don't know. I am decent, I guess. UCLA has some amazing professors so I am learning a lot. My girlfriend is a musician so I guess there is a lot of creativity flowing through our house. It certainly helps."

I watch her eyes fall for a second before she re-groups and rubs my arm gently.

"Your girlfriend, eh?" She smirks a little before continuing. "And where is this girlfriend now?" She raises a challenging eyebrow at me and I feel my heart sink to a new low in the pit of my stomach.

"At home. We had a fight," I inform her flatly as I finish, way too quickly, my present beverage.

"What about?"

"Um…well…" I shake my head and wrap my hand around yet another fresh cocktail that…

_Ummm…_

_What's her name again?_

_Catherine has purchased for me. _

_Wait. That doesn't sound right…_

"School takes up a lot of time, you know? And I guess I haven't really, like, been there, as much as she would like."

"She sounds selfish." She levels me with a knowing glance.

But she does not know anything.

"No, that's not it," I assure her, feeling suddenly defensive and possessive of my baby.

"Oh yeah? Spencer, you are in your first year of college. Some might say this is the toughest year of the whole experience. She shouldn't be making it even harder on you."

She sits back a bit, confidently, as she pats my arm again before leaning close to me. "If you were my girlfriend, I can guarantee that not only would I NOT be giving you shit for doing what it is you have to do, but you would not be sitting all alone in a bar, talking to a stranger when you should be talking to me."

I watch her tuck a piece of her red bangs behind her ear, melding with her brown curls, and I have two thoughts.

She's right.

And…

Ashley.

"I have to go," I announce as I begin to pull myself from the bar stool.

"Wait, Spencer…where are you going?" She rises and places her arms tightly on my upper arms, holding me in place.

"I need to go home…" my voice trails off as the brunette in front of me disappears and all I see is Ashley.

"Aw….come one. We were having a good time," she tries to convince me, and I shake my head.

"Thanks for the drinks," I tell her politely as I fish in my purse and throw a twenty on the bar in front of her belongings.

"Hey, it was my treat. I don't want your money. I want you to stay…just a little longer," she whispers as she starts to lean in towards me.

And as her lips get dangerously close to mine, I close my eyes, take a deep breath…

And pull back quickly before averting my eyes towards the door.

And again…

All I see is Ashley.

But this time, in the flesh.

…

"Baby, open the door, please!"

I pound on the door of our loft, after failing miserably to get my key to work.

That's what happens when the chain lock is firmly in place from the inside.

"Go to your parents' house, Spenc-ER. Or better yet, go back to the Cherry Bomb. Maybe that less attractive version of me is still there!" She shouts through the crack in the door.

Her voice is shaking, and I can tell she is crying.

And my heart is breaking.

"Baby, please just let me in. I know that looked terrible, but honey nothing happened. Please let me in so I can explain," I beg as my own tears come pouring violently from my eyes.

"I know what I saw, and I know how I feel. How I've been feeling for months."

"What have you been feeling for months, Ash?" I inquire, as calmly as I can, my faced pressed against the door, my body crying out for her.

"You're tired of me. You want something new."

And silence overcomes the small distance between us.

_Something new? _

_GOD NO._

_I only want her. _

"Ashley, I only want you! Baby, just let me in so I can talk to you face to face. How could you ever think that? Let me in! Please!" I pound my fists more forcefully against the hard wooden door and cry out in despair.

Partially because it really hurt.

But more because I cannot believe she would ever think I wanted anything, anyone, but her.

After a few more minutes of silence I hear the chain jingle and practically fall on my

face as the door opens.

I regain my balance and bolt inside before she can change her mind and shut me out again.

I slam the door shut behind me and secure every lock on it before turning to come fully faced with her.

And I want to die.

Her beautiful face is streaked with black mascara, her eyes bright red, her hair in disarray.

"Honey, let me explain," I beg yet again as she turns her face from my stare, only to have it crumble completely.

And without a second thought, as if my legs are not even connected to my body, I fall to my knees, and grasp desperately at her hands.

Pulling both hands tightly into my own, I crash my face into her legs and cry so loudly I startle myself, and her as well.

I feel her pull her hands gently from mine before resting them on each side of my head.

I try to form words, but my body is so wracked with sobs that my labor is fruitless for several more minutes.

She begins threading her fingers through my hair and I can almost make out soothing words dropping from her lips.

Using every ounce of strength I can muster, I pull my head up and find her staring down at me, her eyes filled with sadness and concern as she shakes her head a few times and more tears fall from her eyes.

I remain on my knees and grasp for her hands again. Pulling them tightly against me again, I clear my throat and force words up from my throat and into my mouth.

"Baby, first of all, that girl…nothing happened. I mean, she tried, but all I could see, all I could think about…was you…" I begin and I watch her eyes slam shut as more tears squeeze out.

Gripping her so tightly I could probably bruise her, I continue.

"And baby, I don't know what you think has been going on in my mind, but I can assure you, the LAST thing on earth is that I could EVER grow tired of you. The only thing that tires me about you, is how much sleep I lose thinking about you. Even when you are right next to me. It's not enough. I want you, and only you…forever."

I watch her face soften a bit, a few more loose tears escaping the corners of her eyes, as she sinks to her knees and pulls her hands from mine to replace my hands with my face.

"I hated that…seeing you with that girl…her so close to you…" Her eyes squeeze shut again and I pull her body to me tightly.

"I know. Baby, it was nothing. I was drunk and she was just…there. That's it. I don't even know her name. I didn't kiss her. And all she did was confirm to me that I needed to go home to you."

Her eyes flutter open slowly and she returns my embrace.

And we remain, kneeling on the ground, clutching one another tightly, tears falling freely, before we kiss one another desperately.

"I'm so sorry, baby," I choke out as I pull myself reluctantly from her lips. "I'm sorry for not being home more. I'm sorry you eat alone, and go to bed alone. I'm sorry I ever made you doubt my love for you, for a single second. Cause baby, I would die without you. I really would." I grab her face and force her look me hard in the eyes.

"I'm sorry for not being supportive. For making stupid assumptions. I am sorry for locking you out of OUR home." She kisses me hard before pulling back. "This has all just made me realize…"

Her voice trails off as her eyes close again, her face contorting with pain much like before.

"Made you realize what, Ashley?" I whisper as I stroke her cheek, urging her to open her eyes and look at me again.

"That I will do anything…" Her voice trails off again and I cock my head to the side, signaling to her that I don't understand, but I really want to.

"That I will do anything to make sure that I never lose you. Baby, I'd die without you too. I need you to be with me. Forever. I can't be with anyone else. You are it for me, Spencer. And just those few hours without you, not knowing where you were or who you were with. They just confirmed it for me. I want to marry you and spend my whole life with you."

I take in a long, jagged breath, before pulling her back into my arms.

We've been through so much together.

Good times and bad.

But Ashley Davies is it for me.

And I want to marry her too.

Someday.

"Well, then…" I kiss her lightly on her lips and rest my forehead against hers. "Then someday, you'll ask me. And I promise, I'll say yes."

I feel her body relax into mine as our lips find each other again.

And we stay there, on our knees in the middle of the loft, kissing and holding each other, until our knees give out, and we are forced to pull ourselves up and move to our bedroom.


	23. I Wrote This For YOu

Chapter 23: I Wrote This For You

Ashley's POV

"I wrote a song for you."

I force my eyes to meet hers as she lies on her side, her body glistening, her eyes tired but suddenly interested.

"You write me all sorts of songs," she reminds me and I chuckle, nodding in agreement.

"I know, but you have never heard this one."

Her eyes grow wide with excitement as she sits up and pulls the covers up around her body.

"Well play it for me, babe," she urges me. "But first, you have to tell me what it is about."

I smile shyly, acknowledging inwardly that this girl knows way too much about me.

She knows that each word that falls from my lips as I strum my guitar actually comes from somewhere, from something.

"Okay…" I draw out, rising from our bed, only to return a few moments later, dressed in a tank top and boy shorts, my guitar in tow.

"So I wrote this back in high school, after we first….well…got together, so to speak." The last part of my announcement fades into a whisper, and I observe her sit up even straighter.

"After we first what?" She teases, and I laugh softly as I begin to tune my guitar.

"After we first…you know…" I glace up at her through my lashes, and continue to strum and twist until the tuning is just right. "And then we spent the next few days together at school, and I don't know…after that…we were in hiding, for months…but all I wanted to do was…well…just be with you. And I guess I didn't care about anything else…"

She reaches out one hand and rests it upon on of my crossed knees. I feel her squeeze me tenderly, and I sigh before beginning to strum my guitar slowly.

"So this, Spencer Carlin, is what a girl feels after making love to you for the first time, and realizing that everything she ever knew just flew out the bedroom window, and her life changed for good." I smile at her, hoping to express exactly what I am feeling, what I was feeling that night, the next morning, and the days, months and years to follow…

And then I sing to her, the song I wrote for her, many years ago…

A song that she has never heard, until now…

"Sworn to secrecy, I might go after school…  
She was an angel, I saw her swimming there…  
I am in such a mess, I can`t cope without this…  
She just teases me, pretends she can`t see me here…"

_And I am transported back to the days of skipping school, taking Spencer to the beach, diving into the surf, locking my love for her away as she flirts with boys, barely able to cope, until she tells me her deepest, darkest…no…brightest secret…_

So let me go out there…  
I can breathe fresh air…  
Lie with you all night…  
Just let me love you…  
Just for a while, want to…  
Be with you all night,  
Be with you all night,  
Until I fall asleep…

Until I fall asleep…

Until I fall asleep…

Until I faaall asleep…  
Just let me be here…  
I won`t tell anyone…  
I Don`t want to wake up

I Don't want to wake up…

_And I go back again, to the night we let ourselves go, how I didn't want to fall asleep afterwards, but knowing if I did, I would wake up next to her, in a new and better way, and how I wanted to crawl into bed the next morning, and just shut out the world, for just a little bit longer…_

The blind lead the blind, so why can`t I find my way?  
This could be Heaven, but I don`t know where I am…  
I am too frightened, to come out from behind here…  
My body is aching, it feels like it`s wearing me…

_And for the next several months, I felt like the blind leading the blind…knowing I had actually found heaven, but not knowing what it meant or where it might go, and being absolutely terrified, with my body aching for her all the time, and feeling worn out…physically and emotionally…_

"So let me go out there…  
I can breathe fresh air…  
Lie with you all night…  
Just let me love you…  
Just for a while, want to…

Don't want to wake up…

Don't want to wake up…  
Just let me fall asleep…

Just let me fall asleep…

Just let me fall asleep…

Just let me faall asleep…  
Just let me be here…  
I won`t tell anyone…  
Don`t want to wake up…

Wanna wake up…"

_And now, sitting here, watching her watching me, as I set my guitar down on the floor next to the bed, I know now that the insecurities I felt when I wrote this song all those years ago, are gone. _

_Cause she will let me lie with her all night, love her, not just for a while, but until I fall asleep, and then again when I wake up. _

_I no longer don't want to wake up, in fear that when I do, it will all be over. _

_Now I am okay with waking up, cause I know that even after I wake up, we are no longer the blind leading the blind. _

_We are no longer sworn to secrecy. _

_We are no longer teasing one another…unless it's in the good way. _

_We see one another perfectly. _

_I still no longer can cope without this…but I can fall asleep knowing I don't have to._

"Ashley, do you know how much I love you? Do you know how much I want to show you right now?"

Her blue eyes have grown dark as she pulls me on top of her.

And as all clothes are shed, and our bodies connect, deeply and sensually, I focus on letting her show me how much she loves me.

And though I don't want what we are doing to ever end, what a great feeling to not be afraid to fall asleep afterwards.

A/N: For those of you who do not know the song, download Snow Patrol's 'An Olive Grove Facing the Sea, and listen to it as you are reading this chapter, starting with when Ashley starts singing. Hopefully the guitar solo fills her thoughts.


	24. Toes

Chapter 24: Toes

Spencer's POV

"I'll be home in twenty minutes, baby," I promise her as I pull my car onto the freeway. I turn the radio down a bit so I can hear her better.

"Okay, babe. I have dinner ready. And I thought we could just veg out and watch movies all night, drink some wine…and stuff…"

Her voice grows raspy towards the end of her announcement and I feel myself grow excited, in many ways, at the prospect of spending a long night in with her.

"Oh yeah? What kind of stuff?" I tease, hearing her chuckle in response.

"Just stuff…" Her sexy voice trails off and I feel my foot press harder on the gas peddle as I cruise down the freeway towards our home.

"Well, Miss Cryptic, I like stuff. Be home very, very soon." I smile widely as I see the sign for my exit and veer off.

"I love you," she states simply and I risk a very hefty speeding ticket as I fly the final seven miles home to her.

Walking through the door, I find her sitting on the couch, a pizza box sitting on the coffee table, a bottle of red wine open and breathing and the room lit softly with candles.

"What's all this?" I question with a smile, taking her in as I drop my backpack next to the couch and slide in next to her.

She is wearing a skimpy black tank top and black boy shorts, her hair is pulled loosely on top of her head, and as she opens the pizza box and plates a couple slices of pepperoni and hands them to me, I cannot help but think the only thing that looks truly delicious is her.

"Thank you, baby. I am going to change real quick. Be right back," I inform her before leaning down to kiss her tenderly on her lips.

"Hurry," she urges, pouting slightly as I peck her lips again and disappear into the bedroom. I undress down to a skimpy pair of hot pink panties and a tight, white tank, shedding my bra, and pulling my own hair up onto the top of my head.

_Sometimes our long hair gets in the way when we…_

_Well, you know. _

I make my way back into the living room and re-take my seat next to her, sliding in next to her as she hands me a glass of wine and lifts a slice of pizza up to my lips.

I lick my lips seductively and take a large bite as she cups my chin gently.

"Mmmmm…delicious," I assure her, earning a nose-crinkling grin. I chew and swallow my bite before lifting a slice to her lips. She nibbles it coyly before taking a substantial bite. After she swallows it down, she pulls me into a long, hard kiss.

"Uh, uh," I teasingly scold her. "I'm still hungry," I inform her as I pick lean towards her, begging for another bite.

She laughs softly, but complies with my request. We feed each other a couple slices each, washing most bites down with the warm, red wine.

After we are sufficiently full, she closes the pizza box and takes it to the refrigerator before grabbing a second bottle of wine and returning to the couch. She pours me a healthy glass and then fills her own.

Raising her glass, she urges me to do the same. She clears her throat gently, before speaking.

"Here's to you, beautiful. I am so proud of you and how hard you have worked this semester. I know I have been a bear at times…" I laugh loudly and shake my head at her.

"Baby…" I begin to protest but she cuts me off with a finger in the air.

"Now hang on. I know I have been a bear, and you have been downright impossible even more often…" She throws another nose-crinkle at me and her eyes sparkle as she clinks her glass to mine. "But honey, we are really making this work. And I am so happy to have you here with me."

I clink my glass against her again, and tilt my head, showing her all the love and adoration I am feeling for her in this moment.

"I love you, Ash," I interject and she nods before shaking her head.

"I love you, too, Spence. So much." She takes my glass from my hand and pulls me to her, threading her fingers through my hair, causing goose bumps to rise so intensely through my scalp that I am sure my hair just grew an inch.

Crashing her lips against mine, she drags her tongue over my lips and enters my mouth, eliciting a throaty moan from me.

Not wanting to rush a thing, she pulls back and lies back on the couch, pulling me on top of her, allowing me to rest my head on her chest. She finds the hem of my tank and slips her hands inside. She scratches her fingernails gently up and down my back and I sigh and shudder beneath her touch.

"What do you want to watch?" She inquires as she reaches for the remote and flips the television on.

"You, standing in front of me, slowly shedding those sexy black shorts and top."

I pull my head back and allow her to lift her own head and stare up at me.

"Not yet, baby. We have all night. I just want to lie here with you. I just want to be with you, to feel you, just like this," she informs me and she smiles lovingly before placing a tender kiss on my lips.

"Okay," I respond simply, and snuggle into her as she finds the latest episode of the _Real World. _

She continues to caress my back as we laugh and make fun of the idiots on the screen. We talk here and there about our days and make plans for the rest of the weekend.

Maybe we'll meet the gang out tomorrow night for dancing.

We'll likely go to my parents' for Sunday dinner.

We'll try to hit the beach, do some surfing and sunbathing in between it all.

And most importantly, we'll just be…

As her fingertips continue caressing me, she pulls my tank top up higher and begin tracing slow circles on my lower back, moving up slightly to the area between my shoulder blades.

"Hey…"

"What?" I ask and turn to face her. I wiggle by back a little against her fingertips. "Don't stop…"

"You didn't even notice, did you?" Her brown eyes droop a little and she pouts her lips.

"Didn't notice what, baby? I noticed you are not tickling my back anymore if that's what you mean," I tease and wiggle by back again, signaling her to keep going.

"I am writing you a little message. Close your eyes and try to figure out what I am writing." With that, she smoothes her hands over my back like she is clearing her tablet and begins slowing tracing letters across my back.

_I l o v e y o u s p e n c e_

Her fingertips cause the hair on the back of my neck to stand up and goose bumps to form all over my torso.

This reaction would be the same for the next thousand times we play this little game.

I smile and turn to face her. "I love you Spence," I announce, quite proud of myself for figuring it out the first time through. Her pout disappears and she smiles widely, satisfied that I am finally playing along.

"Good job, love. Ok, here's another." She clears her tablet again.

_T u r n o f f t h e t v_

Same goose bumps and butterflies in my stomach from her touch.

_Turn off the t.v._

I repeat her note inwardly, pleased with my ability to make out the letters so easily. I give her a look that tells her I like where that message might be leading, pick up the remote and flip the t.v. off.

Turning to face her, I push her down so she is lying on her back on the couch. Pulling her tank top over her head so that her flat, tan stomach is fully exposed, I slowly begin tracing my fingertips across her abs.

_N o w w h a t ?_

As I trace the question mark, I let the end of my finger drag down into her boy shorts. Picking my finger up off of her skin, I pointedly place the dot at the bottom of the question mark right at the top of her pelvic bone.

Her brown eyes darken a bit, and I can see her body shake slightly. I re-position myself so that I am hovering above her. I draw a second question mark on her stomach, doing the same exact number with the dot, this time raising my eyebrow and waiting for a response.

She slowly pulls my tank top over my head, and clears her tablet again, only this time making my bare stomach her tablet in consideration of the position I was now in.

_W i l l y o u m a k e l o v e t o m e ?_

She stole my question mark move. Very clever of her…

I clear my tablet and write three capitol letters on her stomach.

_Y E S_

Smiling widely, she pulls me to a standing position and grasps my hand securely as she pulls me into our bedroom.

We stand and look at one another for a few moments, the lust in our eye mirroring one another as she pulls me into her arms and kisses me with so much passion I think I am going to pass out.

She pulls back and strokes my cheeks lovingly.

"Lift," she instructs me and I raise my arms above my head. She pulls my tank top up over my head and tosses it on the floor.

"Lift," I repeat and her tank top shortly joins mine on the floor.

"You are so beautiful," she whispers, and even after all this time, I blush fiercely as she stares at my naked torso.

She wriggles out of her black boy shorts and I have my pink panties off in seconds. She takes a few steps towards me and we both groan as our naked bodies come flush against one another.

I feel my knees hit the bed and scoot back, pulling her down over me. We shimmy a little so that I am lying against the pillows, and her body rests down on top of me. We begin a long, heated make-out session as her body slides up a bit and then down so that she is straddling my thigh, her warm center resting against my own.

"Oh, God, baby, you feel so good," I assure her as she pulls one thigh up so that she can slide deeper into to me. She begins to slide up and down my body and our bodies meld tightly together.

"Wait…" I breath out, and she pulls her head up and looks down at me, confusion overcoming her beautiful face. "Not that, not just yet," I request, and she nods her head before pulling her lower body off of me and resting on her side next to me.

"We have all night," she agrees before bringing her hand up and stroking her fingers over my chest before teasing my straining nipples lightly with her fingertips.

"Mmmmm…yeah, like that," I urge her as she takes one nipple firmly between her fingers and begins twisting and pulling on it, earning another moan.

My hips begin to gyrate slowly as she moves back and forth between my breasts, bringing both nipples to hardened peaks beneath her touch.

I duck my head and immediately take one of her breasts into my warm mouth, feeling her body tense at the sensation, and then licking slowly, swirling my mouth around her already hardened bud before moving to the other one.

"Does that feel good? I inquire as I lift my eyes to find her staring down at me, her eyes heavy with lust as she nods her head and cups the back of my head, pulling me harder onto her breast.

Needing no more encouragement, I begin licking and sucking more roughly, pulling her body more closely to me as her fingers continuing working my own breasts.

We are both moaning and panting loudly at this point, and I feel her slip her thigh between my legs, confirming what I am sure she already knew.

I am so wet for her, and I need so much more.

She rolls me on my back and pushes my thighs apart with her knees, tracing her fingers down my sides, dropping warm wet kisses on my chest, rib cage and down my belly until she lands on my hip bone. She licks across my pelvis and then settles in between my legs, pulling them up and resting them over her shoulders as she continues licking down the insides of my thighs, alternating between kisses, bites and licks until she is hovering over the place that is on fire for her.

"Baby, now…" I grasp her head and pull her into me, crying out as her tongue laps my entire length several times before circling the bundle of nerves that is throbbing for her.

"God, you taste so good baby," she murmurs against me as she picks up the pace with her tongue, causing me to buck my hips up into her. I feel her tongue slide down lower until it reaches my entrance, before sliding inside, causing me to moan deep from within my throat.

"Oh, Ash, yes, baby," I encourage her. She trusts into me a few more times, and then, to my delight, I feel her tongue be replaced with two fingers as her tongue moves back up and presses into my hardened nub. She moves it around in hard, flat circles as she begins thrusting in and out of me, making me writhe beneath her as she fills me perfectly.

As my walls begin to restrict, I realize I want her up here with me, I want her to be there with me. I want to feel every inch of her pressed into me.

I loop my arms hands under her arm pits and pull her gently. She gives me one strong hard lick before sliding her body up the length of mine. Finding my lips, she thrusts her tongue into my mouth, and I groan as I taste myself on her mouth.

She skillfully slides herself between me, scissoring our thighs before pulling her lips from mine.

"Baby," I whisper and she smiles before beginning to slide against me. I feel her wetness envelop my own and I grasp her back desperately. "Oh, baby, you are so good." I slide my hands down her damp back and find her tight ass. Grasping it firmly, I pull her deeper into me. She loops one arm under mu thigh and pulls it up, allowing her to push deeper into me.

"Spencer…" she moans before pushing up onto her knees. She lifts my leg up and tosses it over her shoulder before resting back down on me. I am still lying on my back but she is know kneeling, her knees on either side of one thigh while my leg is lifting high over her shoulder.

I gasp in shock as she grinds down onto me. I am sure this position is allowing her to grind more deeply into me than we have ever been able to and I am loosing all control as she pushes down and slides up, increasing the friction between our bodies with each thrust she makes.

"Shit, baby, what on earth are you doing to me?" I cry out, causing her to groan so loudly that I almost come completely undone. "Uh…harder…" I beg and she begins sliding deeper and harder over me, panting and moaning, our bodies slipping and sliding so intensely that I know its only a matter of seconds.

I let my leg rest fully on her shoulder which allows her to slide her hand down and reach behind me, thrusting two fingers into me as she slides deeper and harder. "Oh, fuck, you feel so amazing," she whispers through gritted teeth.

"Oh, Ashley, baby, I'm going to cum!" I cry out, and with a few hard slides against me, I feel myself explode beneath her, my hips lifting to maintain the contact as much as I can until I feel her shudder above me. She cries out in ecstasy and we continue to move against one another until her strength gives out and she collapses on top of me, my thigh falling to the bed, her body coming to rest fully on top of me.

Her mouth hungrily finds mine, and we kiss deeply and wetly until we realize we are barely breathing.

I feel her forehead collapse fully into the crook of my neck and our bodies slowly still until all that can be heard is shallow breaths and murmurs of contentment.

"Oh, God, baby, that was…" And I cannot find the words.

"I know…amazing," she finishes for me and I nod against her chest. "I swear to God, I felt that from my head all the way down to the tips of my toes," she whispers against my cheek before kissing it lovingly.

"Mmm huh…" I agree, before snuggling into her chest and pulling the covers over us. "You made my toes curl," I inform her, and I hear her laugh into my neck.

And just before sleep finds us both, I whisper into her ear…

"Just remember, baby. I will say yes…"

THE END.


End file.
